Help! Problem with LYING

Renee - posted on 10/13/2009 ( 4 moms have responded )

39

0

0

My 5 year old daughter lies all the time.. about little things like whether or not she did what she was told, whether or not she washed herself in the shower.. all sorts of things, big or small. She knows whats right and what's wrong and she knows not to lie, but she still does it and she knows when she gets caught, she gets punished.



I've tried spanking, I've yelled at her, I've tried the calmer approach and took away privileges and toys ------ but nothing seems to be working. What can I do to teach her correctly? I am known for having a bad temper and sometimes I just absolutely lose it when I've told her the same thing over and over and over and over and over.................... I feel so bad after I yell/hit I always apologize to her. But that's another issue that I have to deal with.. my anger/temper.



HELPPPPPP!

4 Comments

View replies by

Renee - posted on 10/13/2009

39

0

0

Thanks Jessica.... I will try this too.. we have a rewards chart at home that I haven't put to use yet. I hope SOMETHING gives.......

Renee - posted on 10/13/2009

39

0

0

Jennifer ------ this sounds so similar. My daughter's teacher also just asked me to come in last week to tell me that she's way ahead of the other kids and they want to have her take a test to see if she could skip a grade. Could there be something to this?? Smart kids and lying? I mean they obviously know what to do and what not to do....... I need answers!

Jessica - posted on 10/13/2009

8

9

0

I know EXACTLY how u feel. Even tho my son is younger than 5, he stills lies and purposely does things to make my upset.



Ive done all the above as well, yelling spanking, the calm approach...and usually he either just crys until he gets something he wants, hits back, or smiles at me like im the fool! haha...



but always try to avoid hitting/spanking (believe me, im still working on that one...i HATE repeating myself when they know better)...it just teaches them its ok to hit, and making your child cry never feels good. Try timeout if you havent tried that yet...give them 1 warning, then if she continues to do it, say ok its the timeout chair, and make her sit their for the time equal to her age.



Also (something ive picked up on supernanny and seems to work pretty well so far), try a reward system! Mine is a small chart of stickers...my son LOVES stickers. There are 10 blocks on his chart. Whenever he does something good (ie goes potty, cleans up his dinner plate) he gets a sticker put into the block, whenever he does something really bad, the sticker gets removed. When he fills up all ten blocks with stickers, he gets his choice of a new movie or a special candy (he LOVES chocolate). And the best part, he usually chooses the candy, so i save money! haha. And as they get older, you can change the prize chart. Give them chores and duties to complete, etc. No lie, find time to watch this show...ive learned so many good things from the show. Whether its to benefit me and the way i parent, or to help my son. Its a great show. Either way, just take it day by day. Hope this helped.

Jennifer - posted on 10/13/2009

29

38

2

i actually have been going thru this with my 9 year old daughter. what makes it frustrating fo rme is lying about stupid things (not that there are good reasons to lie).



i got school involved and was even more confused to find out she is doing amazing in school and teacher wants to test her to put her in gifted program. her behavior just hasn't been adding up.



everyone i have talked to says this is a way kids test limits. they test to see if they can wear you down. stay consistent is the most important thing. if you say you are going to give a consequence for doing something-follow thru. the first time you don't they know they are making headway. also, i suggest positive reinforcement. it's seems a little silly at first, but lay it on thick as i like to say. if she demonstrates good behavior, take notice and tell her (i.e, if she says thank you tell her, that is so polite and great use of manners-GOOD JOB!) It may be a way to get attention too. let her know that she gets just as much attention from you-if not more when she makes good choices.



hope this helps!

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms