help with biting! my 2 year old son keeps biting my 11month old daughter. how do i stop him?

User - posted on 09/29/2009 ( 9 moms have responded )

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i dont think he means to do it as hard as he does because when she crys hes genuinely upset and instantly says sorry. but hes done it so hard that hes left teeth marks on her arm and its bruised, im scared to show her arms in public incase someone rings social services. ive put him on the naughty step and bit him back (not hard enough to leave a mark though) but he doesnt seem to get it. i think its when they play fight he starts getting a bit to rough and bites her, not meaning to do it so hard. hes not a violent child and is normally really well behaved so i dont know why hes suddenly started biting or how to get him to stop. help!

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Brandy - posted on 09/29/2009

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All kids get angry at times. The biting is a natural defense mechanism. Just remind him that it hurts her and relate it as many times as you have to, to when he is in pain from something. The frustration is normal. The terrible twos and threes I would say are starting.

One thing I wouldnt do though is make excuses for him. He sounds like a very capable little boy. You just have to be relentless in your discipline, no matter how frustrating it becomes. Good luck

User - posted on 09/29/2009

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he has got a good memory and hes not angry, hes not got an anger issues, he doesnt bite out of anger, he hardly ever has a tantrum and he knows hes done wrong because he trys to apologise for his mistake. when he bites her he says sorry straight away (without being told to) and then tells us that emmas upset because he bit her so i think he just gets a bit rough when they play, but i cant be there to watch him constantly incase he trys to bite her. but i dont know how to teach him that he mustn't play to rough and bite. its frustrating for me because i know that he knows hes doing wrong and hes a very clever little boy and grasps things really quickly so i know he can do it, i just dont know how!

Brandy - posted on 09/29/2009

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First off, he is two, and trust me, what he normally does is out the window. My son, now 7, also had a problem with biting. Make sure you talk to him about how much it hurts and relate it to sometime he has gotten hurt. If he has short term memory then the next time he gets hurt mention how his biting his sister feels the same way. If you can get him to develop some empathy (hard at this age really) then it will help.

I would continue with what youre doing though. Sometimes it just takes some time. I lightly bit my son back a couple times. He got the hint after awhile.

Try to give him another outlet for his anger and guide him in that direction. Best of luck!

Stephanie - posted on 09/29/2009

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I work in childcare and its typical to see this.....Sometimes we find that their molars are trying to come in...other times its something they link with playing and don't realize it hurts until the other child crys....We usually end up carrying a teether with us and every time they bite we pull them aside and have them bite the teether for a little bit....

Stephani - posted on 09/29/2009

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well if biting him didn't work.. then maybe try and sit him down and explain to him what was done wrong and have him tell you what was done wrong and keep repeting it till maybe it helps... :)

Colleen - posted on 09/29/2009

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this may sound a little harsh but try some hot sauce next time he bites ... tell him that's what he'll get if he bites again ... just a drop or two ... i'm sure he won't like it and won't bite again ... i personally don't think biting the child to show that biting is wrong would be appropriate ... it's like killing people to show that killing is wrong ...

Stephani - posted on 09/29/2009

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what kellie said... if nothing else has worked after no's... then bite him back and let him feel what it is like to get bit... it sounds harsh but sometimes things are... and you have to learn the hard way... even if you are little.. don't be afraid to teach him the hard way... it will help him in the long run :)

User - posted on 09/29/2009

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i dont think its mean to bite him back because he needs to learn that it hurts and hes only gonna learn from experience of being bitten but i dont think it fair to bite him back because hes so upset that hes done it, he tells us that hes done it and he trys to make emma feel betta and comfort her with a hug and a kiss so he knows hes done wrong but he doesnt mean to, so i feel bad for biting him back when its an accident. but hes done it 7 times today!

Kellie - posted on 09/29/2009

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i had the same problem and some people might think this is mean but after trying everything one day i finally just bite him back not hard, but he didnt like it and has never bite since

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