How do I get my 2 year old son to STOP hitting other kids?

Alison - posted on 08/27/2009 ( 3 moms have responded )

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My 2 year old keeps hitting other kids at playdates? We have tried spanking him, time out and having the other kids hit him back... Nothing is working. Any suggestions.... I really need help.

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Alison - posted on 08/27/2009

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I agree looking back now... I did confuse him.... I was just trying things to see what would work. Now I am hearing it from other moms though one of my good friends that they are getting tired of the hitting. I need to do something fast. I really don't want him to lose friends.

Tracy - posted on 08/27/2009

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Quoting Pamela:

Hi Alison

This is what i do with my 2yr old who is doing the same. Every time he goes to hit or does hit I get down to his level tell him no with a strong voice (not yelling) and then redirect him to another activity. If you can redirect him before he hits someone he will hopefully forget about hitting others. Most children hit out of frustration so if you can work out whats making him frustrated it should be easy to modify. You can try time out but he may be too young to understand whats happening. As for hitting him or getting others too that defeats the purpose of the lesson you are trying to teach him because you are telling him that hitting is not ok by hitting him which is sending a very mixed up signal to him. If you know what i mean. Hope that helps



I agree with this completely. You can't tell a child not to hit and then hit them. They don't understand. Also, try to give them a solution if there is a problem. Such as saying something like, I know you are mad that I said you couldn't [...] but instead of hitting me, I would like for you to say ...  . I give my 2 yr old daughter the tools to express herself. When she's upset with me, she'll say "I don't like the way you are talking to me Mommy, don't talk to me right now". Depending on the sitution I react accordingly, as to if she is saying it to be fresh or not. You have to be consisant with how you handle the hitting. With my daughter, when she swings at me, she gets put in time out and has to wait for a buzzer to sound before she can get up and then we talk about it.

Pamela - posted on 08/27/2009

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Hi Alison



This is what i do with my 2yr old who is doing the same. Every time he goes to hit or does hit I get down to his level tell him no with a strong voice (not yelling) and then redirect him to another activity. If you can redirect him before he hits someone he will hopefully forget about hitting others. Most children hit out of frustration so if you can work out whats making him frustrated it should be easy to modify. You can try time out but he may be too young to understand whats happening. As for hitting him or getting others too that defeats the purpose of the lesson you are trying to teach him because you are telling him that hitting is not ok by hitting him which is sending a very mixed up signal to him. If you know what i mean. Hope that helps

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