How do I have a career and stay at home more?

Erica - posted on 06/17/2009 ( 2 moms have responded )

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I am really struggling with this lately. I like my job and my career, but I can't stand the guilt of being away from my toddler. Today he came home with a major goosebump, and I can't help to think that it wouldn't have happened if he had one-on-one with me vs. one caregiver to the four kids. How do I deal with this?

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Heather - posted on 06/17/2009

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I think that it is a constant struggle with moms! Do we stay home, do we work?? Then whatever we decide, we are constantly second guessing ourselves!! It is really like being stuck between a rock and a hard place!! I have four children and was a stay at home mom for 7 years up until about 4 months ago. We needed the money. I am now babysitting during the day and then working a few nights a week as a manager at Gymboree. The discount is great, and I get out of the house for a while. When I was home I struggled because I felt that I should be bringing in some money. Now that I am working I struggle with the fact that I am not at home!! I think that you have to find the right balance for you and your family. Some women that I know, HAVE to work to stay sane! They love their kids, but need that time away. I feel too that you have to remember that even if you were home, he could have gotten hurt. You need to remember that it is the quality time that you spend together, not the quantity!! I have noticed that I am now, slowing down, to play, to read another story, to sit and eat breakfast with the kids. When I was home full time, I was juggling a million things....laundry, cleaning, cooking, facebook. Now, I feel more involved with the kids. You need to find your balance!! Take care, and don't be so hard on yourself!!

Samantha - posted on 06/17/2009

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Try talking to your boss and see if you can work part time, or maybe from home several days a week. If you don't need the job, no else can raise your child better than you can. I currently stay home with my 3 kids and I really like it. When they get a little older I might find at least a part time job to keep me busy with other things. Think about what is best for you and your family.

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