husband(father of children) not very attentive to children

User - posted on 03/15/2010 ( 5 moms have responded )

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Is it okay for the father of my children to not spend very much time with them( I guess compared to the time and activities that I do)? He also is very hard on them at times and yells a lot. it is starting to affect our marriage and I really find him very unattractive when he does these things. Sometimes I just wish they had it better as far as a dad goes. Any one else going through this?

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Betty - posted on 03/15/2010

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I'm sorry for your situation. My husband is a great dad. I don't think it's okay to yell at a child but sometimes a parent just needs to yell and guys tend to be harder on kids. When my husband is too hard on our girl I just tell him afterward(when our daughter isn't listening) how I think the situation should have been handled, he doesn't always agree but it makes me feel better and it's better than holding onto the anger. Sometimes if I will step right in and defend her but only when I know I really need to(like if it's a girl thing he just can't understand). He is very hands on and does a lot for his daughter, he's bit too hard on her from time to time but he is also very loving and fun. Just remember to notice when he is being a good dad too.

Lynsey - posted on 03/15/2010

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My daughters father sometimes yells at my daughter or tells her to shut up when shes crying instead of finding out whats wrong with her. It only makes her more upset and it hurts me. They just dont have enough patience

User - posted on 03/15/2010

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Thanks Bekka but it has been pointed out and he has told me that it is bull shit, so I don't think that there is any reasoning with him.

Bekka - posted on 03/15/2010

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my partner isn't over attentive either, my daughter is only a month old mind you. I think most men don't have the patience with young children that mothers do. I find it annoying when i need that little extra hand and do not get it, I would talk to your husband about the yelling, and just say to him that if it gets to much, just to walk away, I myself would rather take over and attend to the kids then have them getting upset. Perhaps all he needs is the attention brought to his behaviour, as he may not know he is being so overbearing until it is pointed out. :) good luck!

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