i dont know what to do i need help :( finally snaped on abusive boyfriend(baby father) and i got charged. Now he is threatening if i dont take him back ..the courts will give him full custdoy is this true?

User - posted on 03/03/2013 ( 2 moms have responded )

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My daughters father my recent ex was abusive in every way for almost 3 years ..one of those guys that has a double personailty can be soo charming and manipulating but can also be a monster..almost everyday i was put down or called names ..and was assulted in some way or anther at least a hand full of times ..from beign spit on to my face being grabbed being pushed against a wall..smacked a few times and once i was hit really hard in the mouth/jaw...i know ppl may wounder why the hell it even got to this point or why i stayed with him :( there have been break ups i have kicked him out plenty of times i have left him but came back or let him back ..he used my daughter against me saying i was being selfish and only thinking about myself he has never been abusive or mean to her its just me who he abuses in some way or anther :( he can be two ppl like i said i have been fooled so many times he makes promises like getting therapy and then didnt..anyways im assuming you see the picture here last saturday i caught him looking on craigs list for a mistress i got upset and confronted him and he flipped out an argument started and i kept asking him to leave as our daughter was sleeping . He wouldnt leave and continued to yell at me and call me names i couldnt take it anymore so i grabbed my hair gel off my dresser and throw it in his direction ..i was not trying to cause him harm just wanted the noise to stop . it hit him in the eye brow a small container of hair molding gel it gave him a lil goosebump n bruise i got scared and ran out the door i was shocked it hit him ..he didnt come after me i came back in and heard him on the phone he called the police and they came to my house and arrested me just as my 17 month old daughter was waking up from her nap :( i was horrified and devastated i could not believe after all the things he had put me through and done to me i was the one who ended up in the back of a cop car :( Now he is threatening me if i dont take him back that he will take me to court and win custody ...Im sooo scared iam soo stressed out my daughter is eveyrthing to me this man makes me fear everything ..now c.a.s is comign to my house in a couple days and i have court in 5 weeks ..can he take my daughter from me because i finally stood up to him ? will he win custody because of that? pls help :( i have no idea what to do i need advice ?

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Anita - posted on 03/03/2013

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Wow honey I am deeply sorry that you are going this kind of thing. I think that someone who can help you would be Legal Ad they are free to call and will answer any questions that you may have. No matter what do NOT take him back do NOT show him fear even though that can be hard. Do what you have to do to show that you can raise your child that came out your body with no worries about doing so. If you can give your child food, shelter, and everything else they need I see no reason why you would not get your child. He would have to go to the courts and prove that you are an unfit mother and in order to do that he needs more prove then just you snapping on him. He is a abusive therefore that shows that he is the unfit parent if you have reports of the abuse then that will look good for you in court. Again I am sorry. I hope that I was some what helpful I would love to keep in touch with you through this so that you do not have to do it alone please message me if you need anything I will do my very best to help you.

Ndugga - posted on 03/03/2013

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Had u told anyone about him? A friend,neighbor or relative? They could testify that he has always abused you and you were just defending yourself. Goodluck

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