I feel like im a bad mom

Brandy - posted on 03/26/2009 ( 102 moms have responded )

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hi im a stay at home mom and wife..i only have one son who is 5 months and 3 weeks..anyways this past week every one in my home has been sick my son thomas and husband james are doing good now but i spent the week taking care of them not me(thats what moms do )but i feel like a bad mom because i want to ask for a BRAKE ...in the past ohmost 6 months i have been away from my son for no more then 10 hours and that was not at one time it was an hour here and hour there..i love him soo much i dont want to be away from him for a long time but sum times like today i just want to run away for a night.but i dont want people to say im pushing my kid on them or im just think of my self not my baby

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Heather - posted on 03/29/2009

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I used to be a stay at home mother too. I had the husband and 3 kids!! You should in no way feel like a bad mom for needing a break. I never got a break, and now I'm divorced!!! You start resenting the people around you for not OFFERING!!! It's hard work being a mother, whether you work outside the home or not. My best advice to you, is take a night at LEAST once a month. I personally would say 1 night every 2 weeks, and just go out with girlfriends. Go out to eat, see a movie. Get your hair done. Get a massage.... Just do something for YOU. I know it sounds almost...wrong.... but don't even think about your husband or your son when you're out. Just focus on you, and relaxing. They will make it a few hours without you!!! You deserve it!!!

Julia - posted on 03/28/2009

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Quoting Danielle:



We all need some ADULT conversation with out SpongeBob playing in the backround... TRY IT... you'll see how needed it was and you'll make time to do it more often. Your not a bad mom... we need time for ourselves too!! Good Luck!





This is fabulous! Even at this moment SpongeBob is playing...



You're right though, even when we have friends over for me, with children's shows playing in the background it's that lingering knowlege that it's still kids' time. When you forget about yourself everyone else will too. There's that saying that you have to take care of #1, and that's you. When you put yourself on the back-burner for too long, you might even forget who you are.

Brenda - posted on 03/28/2009

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Every mom needs a break!  Don't feel bad for wanting one at all.  Take an afternoon or morning and arrange to have a friend babysit or leave him with your husband!  I've been a SAHM since I got pregnant this time, and there is nothing wrong with wanting to get away for a while.  Yes, our children are very important to us, but so is our sanity!  I recently started graduate school and I used to work part time, and to be honest, the main reason (aside from getting a better job of course) is that I get out of the house and away from my son (soon to be sons).  We all need time to ourselves to recollect our thoughts and it has nothing to do with how much we love our kids.  Raising kids is a stressful thing to do, no matter the age, and sometimes, we all need "me" time without anyone pulling on our pants or yanking on our hair or yelling "mama I want you!" (my son's favorite saying lately).  To think of your baby you have to think of yourself.  The better you feel, the better you feel around the baby.  Never feel bad for wanting alone time, sometimes it can do a lot of good!

Jodi - posted on 03/26/2009

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Honey you're not a bad mom, you're a human mom! I'm a SAHM to 3 boys ages 5 1/2, 4, and 1 1/2. As much as I love my boys and I love staying home with them, there are days that I would cheerfully kill someone in order to go pee by myself. Why don't you see if there is a MOPS group around you. We've got one here and I love it! Once a week moms get together and let the kiddies play while you get some grown up time. Usually once a month or so we have a "childless" lunch. We get someone to watch the kids in the next room while we have a mommies only lunch.

Kelly - posted on 03/26/2009

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Absents makes the heart grow fonder. You'll be a better mom when you do take a break. You'll be rested and refreshed and ready to roll again. Moms are much like rechargeable batteries if you don't charge them when they are low they just wont work.

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Brittany - posted on 10/12/2012

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no u are not a bad mom everyone ,even moms, need a break. dont listen to what anyone else says sometimes you just need to pamper yourself to make you feel better. i completley understand where u are coming from exspecially when everybody in the house is sick. i hope you get a break soon it would be good for you good luck..

Keriane - posted on 10/12/2012

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im 27 and im a stay at home mum to my 8 month old boy and as much as i love him,i feel so alone.i live out in the sticks and all my mates live away from me.and the thing is,they wont make any effort to come and see me.im the one who's expected to do all the running around for everyone all the time.it just feels like everybody else comes first and im just well and truly thrown on the backburner.i dont even know who i am anymore.i just feel like im mum and slave and thats it.dont get me wrong,im very grateful for all the thing ive got e.g a healthy son,a roof over our heads,food on the table but that still doesnt change the fact that im sad and lonely.ive been bullied all my life and feel like such a failure.i worry every day that my son will turn out like me. please help me someone??? :(

Stephanie - posted on 04/01/2009

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Im the same im a single mum, im with my son 24/7 ive a great family that helps out in talking him if i ever need a break (father is not around), but when people do take him i feel guilty especially if ive nothing planned like a nite out, i try to get out once a month with friends or even a girlie nite in, but if i really need a break someone will take him for but i feel really guilty but i always remind myself and people are always reminding aswell that if i need a break he must need a break aswell, it will help him as much as it helps me.. So never ever think your being a bad mother everyone needs a break once in awhile, it doesnt make anyone a bad person, i know its hard but just try and enjoy it, cause you dont what a child either that wont go with anyone when you really need them to. Good luck and enjoy it.. x

Brandi - posted on 04/01/2009

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Everytime I start to feel guilty about spending time away from my daughter I remind myself of a few things. First, lots of people love her and she needs to spend time with them, without me, for lots of reasons. Second, I want to teach her, by example, that she is worth the time to take care of herself. If I don't take time out for me and my needs, then that's what she'll learn. It's hard, but worth it!

Kerry - posted on 04/01/2009

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You are by no means a bad mother. It is important for a mothers to have time to themselves. It is just as important as making sure parents have quality time alone. I feel that is where the father comes in. He should step up and help you out. I feel bad asking someone to babysit in order for me to go out. I feel like they think that I do not want to be around my son. This is not the case. I love my son more than anything in this world, but in order for me to be the best mother I can, i need to be able to have some time to myself or time for me to go out with my friends. Just because we are mothers does not mean that we lose who we are as a person.

Jacki - posted on 03/31/2009

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I don't think that makes you a bad mom at all. We all need a break every now and again.



I have been very fortunate to find some "me" time since my son's been born. Even if it was just going to WalMart for groceries all by myself. Being able to get away and recharge my batteries made coming back to my husband and son much more enjoyable.



Even just soaking in a bath for a little while will make you feel so much better. There are many ways to get some personal time, without spending money or leaving home. Dedicate even 30 minutes to doing something you enjoy and not having to worry about the baby or your husband...and that will help them have time to bond too.

Even though you're a mom doesn't me you aren't entitled to a break once in a while. :D

Michelle - posted on 03/31/2009

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Same here but her dad doesnt barely work and when he does he never helps with bills, diapers, food, anything. Right now is my break and I am having a hard time during the day because I go to sleep around 1am and then he wakes us up around 6am. He has no curtisy or manners. He wont be quite in the mornings.

User - posted on 03/31/2009

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I am also a stay at home mom and wife. We live over 300 miles away from our closest family member. I have never been away from my son for more than 10 hours at a time once in a great while. In the past 7months, I haven't been away from him for more than 4 hours at a time...outside of his sleeping. 2 weeks ago I lost our babysitter due to medical issues no longer allowing her to watch our son. I live in a very rural area so it is hard to find a babysitter to begin with!! Some days I feel like I am a bad mother myself, especially when my son is having a bad day and I can't make him happy. My husband works 6-7 days a week 12 hours a day. He gets home, eats, and goes to bed...not much of a help with our son. My break is late nights when everyone is sleeping and dishes are done, toys are picked up, laundry is folded...

Michelle - posted on 03/31/2009

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I believe everyone here knows how you feel, I know I do. I was a working mom until the economy kicked me in the butt. Now for the time being I am a stay at home mom. I have a little girl who is on top of me daily. I need time to myself but rarely get it because her father wants to see her but doesnt want to actually take care of her. So I will try to go take a shower and less than 5 minutes later (right after I get the water turned on and I step in) there he is with her asking "are you done?" I cant even use the restroom without having to drap her along. So there is days I need a break and thats when I call my friend up and ask her if we can come over so that I can visit with her and so that the girls can entertain themselves and I will have a small 2-3 hour break. Your not a bad mom. It happens to everyone.

Michelle - posted on 03/31/2009

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I believe everyone here knows how you feel, I know I do. I was a working mom until the economy kicked me in the butt. Now for the time being I am a stay at home mom. I have a little girl who is on top of me daily. I need time to myself but rarely get it because her father wants to see her but doesnt want to actually take care of her. So I will try to go take a shower and less than 5 minutes later (right after I get the water turned on and I step in) there he is with her asking "are you done?" I cant even use the restroom without having to drap her along. So there is days I need a break and thats when I call my friend up and ask her if we can come over so that I can visit with her and so that the girls can entertain themselves and I will have a small 2-3 hour break. Your not a bad mom. It happens to everyone.

Algerine - posted on 03/31/2009

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I'm a stay at home mom as well, and for the past couple of weeks my husband and 3 children(ages 2 1/2, 3 1/2 , and 5) have all bee very sick, so I completely understand where you're coming from. I seriously needed a break. I went out for two hours and whe i came back i was refreshed and less stressed about handling household duties. Taking a break in no way makes you a bad mother, so please dont feel like one. i feel that a mother taking a break(shopping,nails,movie, etc.) is actually healthy thing in a family. it allows you some much needed me time to gather you thoughts and unwind, so then you can give you family 100% of yourself. hope this helps.

Stephbleau - posted on 03/31/2009

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Don't feel bad! You are not a bad mom cause you want a break, it is completely normal, I am a single mother of 2 and I work and spend the rest of my time with my children and my doctor told me that it wasn't healthy for me to spend all of my time working and taking care of my kids because I need time for myself and to have time where I am me and not just a mom. You need that to! You need time to me you and not just a mom and wife. I know it sounds selfish but it will help with you mental health which is so important to your family. I hope you feel better about this cause your not bad for feeling this way!

Lisa - posted on 03/31/2009

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hunny every mum needs me time even if it a chta on the phone 2 a friend while bubs is asleep. my god i must b a horrible mum my daughter is nearly 3 and every 3 wks i go out with the girls and just let loose cause being a mum is the best job but its a 24/7 thing  and can b stressful and if mummy is stressed so is the rest of the family lol... so take time 4 ur self u deserve it

Singkop Desiree - posted on 03/31/2009

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I know exactly how you feel...but hey, there's no such word as SuperMom...coz we all have our limitations..I feel like taking a break myself..It would be nice to just go away from the usual routines..to just lay down and read while u listen to the sweet jazz songs for a couple of hours. What make me upset most of the times though is the fact that my husband doesn't seem to understand this need..i mean, it's like he expects me to do this because i am a mother and a wife...this is my responsibility, i know..but i am also a person who has needs and wants and dreams...I don't know if any of u feel the same..but sometimes...I wonder what life would be like...if I didn't get married...and have children...and still doing all the things I love doing when I was single...I love my daughters, I really do...and I know U love ur son,too...so, don't think of yourself as a bad mom..because you're not...You are only human...with certain needs and dreams..and yes, you...we, moms, are entitled to A BREAK..or else we might crumble and fall...and in no time we'll be perfect candidates for the loony bin..LOL...All we have to do is to install this idea to the brains of our beloved husbands..Now, moms...installing this idea is a very tough job... ;-)

Pooja - posted on 03/31/2009

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you are human! you need a break, i used to feel this way with my 1st baby....do it all and then get overwhlemed by it all ...you need a few mins, if not more, of just me time. it si important to just relax and get away, even if that means going chores outside the house, by ur self. hand over your son to your husband and go take a long shower or go for a walk, you will feel wonderful :) hang in there....we all have these kinds of days!

Sharon - posted on 03/31/2009

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Don't feel bad. Every mother needs a break sometime. Sometimes to be the best mom you can be you need a break.

Sarah - posted on 03/31/2009

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every 1 needs a break some time i should no lol with a five yr old with autisum and a 8 mth old son im always tied and there wake up time is 6 i need just 1 night that i just want 2 sleep without worrying about the kids waking ect but its hard when no babysitter and my b/f working all hrs so i understand where ur coming from its not selfish its common sence

Amanda - posted on 03/31/2009

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i UNDERSTAND HOW YOU FEEL, I AM A STAY AT HOME MOM, AND I RUN MY OWN DAYCARE OUT OF MY HOUSE. I TAKE CARE OF MY OWN KIDS, AND OTHER PEOPLE'S KIDS. I HAVE A 5 1/2 MONTH OLD AND 6 YR OLD, AND THEY ARE OBTH ALOT OF WORK, I RECENT;Y BLEW UP WITH MY HUBBY TELLING HIM I WANT SOME ME TIME, AND I DESERVE IT. I DO EVERYTHING AROUND HERE, AND WETHER I CAN HANDLE IT ALL OR NOT, I SHOULD NOT HAVE TO AS I AM NOT A SINGLE PARENT, AND I DID NOT MAKE THESE CHILDRN ALONE. I THINK YOU SHOULD TALK TO DAD, AND I THINK YOU SHOULD GET SOME ALONE TIME, AND SOME TIME ALONE WITH YOUR HUBBY BUT DON'T LET ANYONE MAKE YOU FEEL BAD, WE ALL NEED A BREAK, THAT'S WHAT KEEPS US SANE!!!

[deleted account]

I know how you feel and it is hard. Do you have family that live close? I had my parents watch mine 1st overnight at 6mths and man it was so nice. If your not ready for overnight try a day and even if you just sit at home or take a bath. You need that to be a good mom your time to relax and take care of yourself. don't feel bad it is neccessary maybe every 2 weeks or so someone can take him for the day so he can have grandma or pa time or just daddy time which is great bonding for him too. good luck and take YOU time.

Sarah - posted on 03/31/2009

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i know how you feel my husband is gone for 7 days at a time and when he comes home he has things to do outside so im with my baby all the time i love her to death but sometimes i just need a break so i totally know how you feel i dont' think that its bad i have noticed the once in a blue moon that i do get to be a way i come back and feel like a better mom cause im rested happier and alot more patient

Holly - posted on 03/31/2009

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So, not only is it CRUCIAL for you to get a break every now and then it's REALLY important for your chlid. taking time for yourself  is the only way your child will get the confidence to know that you can go away for a little while and you will come back. If you don't get him used to it now when he goes to school or god forbid there's an emergency he will be a mess.  Making your child comfortable with others (not strangers but people YOU feel confident to leave your child with) will make him more confident.  be secure that you are worth taking a break. it will relax and rejuvenate you. 

Holly - posted on 03/31/2009

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So, not only is it CRUCIAL for you to get a break every now and then it's REALLY important for your chlid. taking time for yourself  is the only way your child will get the confidence to know that you can go away for a little while and you will come back. If you don't get him used to it now when he goes to school or god forbid there's an emergency he will be a mess.  Making your child comfortable with others (not strangers but people YOU feel confident to leave your child with) will make him more confident.  be secure that you are worth taking a break. it will relax and rejuvenate you. 

Rebecca - posted on 03/31/2009

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I was the same way.my husband kept telling me we needed a brake and i wouldnt have it but I finally left my son with my parents when he was almost two. He did great and i woke the next morning wondering why i hadnt asked for help sooner!every mommy need a night for herself and its not gonna make you a bad mom.I get sad now because my son refuses to come home with me on the weekends when we hangout with my family.he has actaully stayed the past 3 fridays with my parents!

[deleted account]

Girl, Mommas need breaks too. Have your man take him for a bit while you cater to yourself. You're NOT being selfish. You can't be all that your little man needs if you're not all there...and trust me, there is NO checking out when you've got a family. It's ok to recoup after a tough week of sickness, business, a couple of rough nights...whatever the case may be, moms do a lot! We need DO need a break every now and then, and it's OK to do so. If you can't get out of the house or don't have enough money to, make your bathroom your spa. Light some candles, close the door and lock it, and take a nice long, hot bath. When I do this I tell my husband and my daughter, "Mommy is needds privacy. NO ONE is aloud to come into this bathroom unless you're bleeding from the ears or on fire. If I don't get a break to myself for a while, I will explode." That usually works. Or you can take a little lunch break by yourself, go tot the library, paint, go to a movie alone or with the girlfriends...there's a plethora of ideas for "time with self" that don't include Baby/Child. And trust me, most people have been there and will not mind sitting for you. Hope this helps!

~Brandi

Shannon - posted on 03/31/2009

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it's not bad parentin...our doctor always tells us we need time without the kids...we haven't had a day/night without our oldest for a long time...and now with us havin 2 it's harder to get away....usually the only time i get to myself is in the shower or when i go to work...hubby is doin the stay at home dad thing, so i can work...i hate bein away from my kids, but they recomend that every parent do it so they can get themselves back and it helps them not to be so stressed out.....we would have my hubby's mom watch our kids but she can only handle our daughter for an hour alone and my mom has no problem with them.....but we live 45min from our families so it's a little harder....

Kimberly - posted on 03/30/2009

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It's not bad to need a break. Everyone does, especially after being sick and taking care of everyone else. I'm a full time student and I work a few hours more than I'm in class, so my son stays with my mom, who loves being a stay-at-home grandmother. You can imagine that I hate missing anytime with him, but even I have to have break when I have my son for long periods of time. Part of that comes from me having to reverse bad habits my dad has allowed to take root, but it's normal. Doesn't make you a bad mom at all, just a tired one who could use some mommy time.

Becky - posted on 03/30/2009

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Hey!!! Just want to let you know, you're not a bad mum. What's best for mum is best for baby. Me and my kids dad split a while back, and recently we've started putting a good system in place. As he doesn't work, or contribute a lot, we decided he can contribute by having the kids for a few nights every month. It gives me a chance to just be me for a few days. I don't know your situation sweetie, but if you've got no willing relatives, maybe just as one of your close friends to act as babysitter. If they're a friend they'll understand you're not passing baby off at them, even offer them something for it, and go and have a night out. That way you can just be you for a night. Friends will do friends favours, that's what friends do! And you'll feel much better for it, your friend will be happy to see you happy, and baby will be pleased mummys happy!

Bridget - posted on 03/30/2009

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That doesn't make you a bad mom @ all. I felt that way also when my babys were younger. Until one day I woke up and I was a mess. I was depressed, stressed to the the max, and felt horrible. I then came to the conclusion that in order to be a good mom you have to..HAVE to take breaks. I try to get some time away weekly. Daily if possible, even if it is just a 5 minute breather walk. Staying at home is no easy task. Our husbands have to understand that when they leave work and come home they get a transition period. If you stay at home you don't get that time to unwind and recooperate.

Lisa - posted on 03/30/2009

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You should not feel like you're a bad mother for wanting a little break. I think sometimes, mothers need a break to keep their sanity. And by the way, I can tell your a good mother, your son is adorable and looks well taken care of.

Helen - posted on 03/30/2009

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PLEASE don't feel like this!! I'm the opposite! My mum has my little boy for 1 day and one night nearly every week!! I really need my time away and feel so much more able when I get back. I love my boy more than life, but I know that without breaks I'd be less patient and possibly in a bad mood!! TREASURE any time to yourself!!!

Kris - posted on 03/30/2009

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I think that everyone needs a break. It's not bad to think that. Sometimes us moms just need some "mom" time :D

[deleted account]

We all feel this way. Don't be hard on yourself. I only have one child too and she is now five years old. I'm also a single mom so it's even harder for me to get a break. What I do is take her to the playroom at the gym for an hour or so a day and I work out. It's a nice break for the both of us. You have to put yourself before anyone. If you're not happy you're not doing anyone any good.

Melissa - posted on 03/30/2009

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hello stranger ...i really do understand.....i have 3 and i just gave birth to a new born hes 2 months now....and i feel like that 2 ...so many times....
so what i do is i go take a walk or .....i shut my self in my bathroom and take a bath ....and put all my appliances on (washer ...dryer...)and hot water ...that relaxes me so much i get out of that bathroom very much relaxed....
but don feel bad if you ask for help or some one to sit for you ...
it s okay .....its goo dto ask for help 1once in a while...

Bethany - posted on 03/30/2009

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You are in no way a bad mother, nor are you being selfish with thinking you need a break. You definitely do. If you don't take a break, you put your husband and child at risk of lashing out at them. You HAVE to get away and have some time for yourself. Each and every mother understands this and will be happy to take over for you to give you the time you need. My husband and I have discussed this because it is a necessity for me to get away from the children. You have to have some adult time. Take a night once a month for yourself. Go out with some friends or just by yourself. I have gone out all alone and it is just as refreshing as going out with friends. The time away from children recharges your batteries and makes it so you're able to care for your family better. Have the discussion with not only your husband but your friends and family as well. Let them know that you are feeling a little cooped up and you need to take some time out for yourself. If anyone disagrees, they need to step in your shoes for a week. You deserve time away. Taking care of a family is a 24/7 job. You don't get to relax. I hope you get to take your "me time" soon!!

Bryanna - posted on 03/30/2009

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I have a girl come in once a week for 2 hours shes 18 I pay her 10 bucks and hour, I usually run, or go to the gym, shop. Anything that will clear my head and make me come back and focus only on my daughter. I don't have a husband or boyfriend that will take her. If you are finding it hard there is no reason you don't deserve that.

also you can join a gym that has childcare, that way your are getting healthy and also your baby is getting socialized.

GOOD LUCK!!! you need a break take it!

Sarah - posted on 03/30/2009

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every one needs a break.ive been a single parent since my son was 2-3months and after a few months i really needed a break.i didnt want to ask for any help but he's almost 2 now and his pa (my dad) has him for one night a month and he's now in childcare twice a week.this gives me a little break but at first i felt REALLY bad not being with him.just remember if you dont take care of yourself (that includes having a break),then you wont be able to look after your family as you would like to.dont ever feel guilty!!

Wendy - posted on 03/29/2009

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You know your limits-baby's are hard work-I ask for breaks all the time! You'd think I was a TERRIBLE Mom ;) Knowing when you need a break and not over doing it IS doing something for your baby as well as you. You have to take care of yourself so that you can take the best kind of care of him.

Christi - posted on 03/29/2009

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I ‘m a working mother (Home day care) I have three sons the youngest 6 months and two military dependents making my total children 5, Plus 3 who come every day in addition. I tell you this to say just where I am coming from as an understanding mother. It took me a long time to learn and I am still learning, the way to being a GOOD mom is doing your very best and trying your hardest. My hubby is teaching me when my personal needs including time for me are not meet my children do not see the best side of me but the exhausted over frustrated side of me that becomes unfair to them. So take time for you. Take a hot bath. Take a nice swim, play bingo or just go shopping or to dinner alone or with your spouse you'll return refreshed and wonderful for your baby.

[deleted account]

i got an i dead for you tel the grandparents to take jim for that night or even a weekend thats what i do :) iit helps!!

Nicole - posted on 03/29/2009

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You deserve a break! If I were you I would not be afraid to ask someone you trust for a little break. I believe that by getting to spend a little bit of time away from your kids actually makes you a better mom because then when you are with them...you are so happy to be with them! A break is refreshing and every mom deserves a break form time to time. Hope this was a bit helpful. And admitting you need a break is normal, don't feel like you are a bad mom. I was actually surprised when I read this post because I was expecting to read somehting about being frustrated with your children or something worst....so you are a great mom!!!

Emma - posted on 03/29/2009

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hiya my names emma im a single mum too 1 (jake) hes 3 this year, everyone needs a brake hun at some point. i work 3 nightsa week and thats my brake but i have'nt really got any family members around to help not hasmuch has i like. dont feel bad just because you want the night off and im not being nasty but think yourself lucky you have someone there with you, best of luck hun x



 

[deleted account]

Take a break. You have to for your own sanity. When you come back to your child, even after two hours, you will feel refreshed and ready to be a mom again.

Sarah - posted on 03/29/2009

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my lil boy stayed at his nan's when he was 6 weeks old, I desperatly needed a break so finally decided to take the help that was offered like my health visitor told me too. I had a worse nights sleep then what i would have had if i had him but i felt so much better the next day. He is 11 weeks old now and every saturday night he stays with his nan and grandad, gives me a break and gives my mum and dad quality time with him. there is nothing wrong with having a break, you will find that you are more relaxed and have got more patience if you have the break that you deserve

Amber - posted on 03/29/2009

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This is totally normal. You DO need a break you are a human. I have 3 kids and had them constantly so much that I had a nervous breakdown. You can only take so much. A break from your child doesn't make you a bad mom..it can make you a better one. You won't be so frustrated when you come back. Go to the gym or to the mall. a few hours will make a huge difference. You HAVE to think about yourself too. Any mom will tell you that. If someone thinks you are a bad mom or pushing your kid off on them must not have kids :)

T_cjones108 - posted on 03/29/2009

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every mommy needs a break! i stay at home with my 8.5 month old boy and i love it but i do work 2 days a week and they are short shifts but its nice to get out and talk to other adults. plus every thursday i go to a mommy and baby group for lunch and theres a topic to talk about too :) i found that helps, hes with me but theres always someone there who wants to hold a baby and gives you time to eat ur lunch :) plus i meet up with all my girl friends and sometimes we go for coffee after !! do u have family close by?? my inlaws have taken my boy over night on saturdays sometimes!! (3 times since he was born ) its time with their grandson and most of all DATE NIGHT :D and sleeping in!!! dont feel like a bad mommy for needing a break ur and awsome mommy for noticing YOU NEED the break :D

Tasha - posted on 03/29/2009

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Sweetheart, your not a bad mom!! EVERYONE feels like that sometimes!! Actually, I get that feeling at least once everyday!! My daughter is two months old, and she goes EVERYWHERE with me because my husband is afraid that he'll hurt her because she is so tiny. I get really frusterated because she is soo demanding!! I know that she is my first and thats why i'm still adjusting, but my husband also works 12 hour shifts!! I dont do anything for myself either because when she lays down for a nap, I try to get a load of laundry done, or load the dishwasher. Dont feel bad about wanting a night away, I often feel that way too. My husband and I did come to an aggrement though. We call it "an hour of silence" . When he gets home, and relaxes for a bit, I can tell him I need my "hour of silence". What that means is that I get an hour to myself to go in my room and read a book, take a bubble bath, whatever as long as it is for me and not about the house or anything else and he takes care of our daughter. It really helps me relax and rewind, and plus it gives him some quality time with our daughter!!!! Maybe this would work out for you and your family?? It has done wonders for me!! Good luck sweetheart, and remember that it is good to reconize your own needs and relize that your more than a wife and a mom, YOU'RE YOU!! If you dont take care of yourself, who will????

Penny - posted on 03/29/2009

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I totally understand how you're feeling. As my boy usually stay over my mum place during the weekend. I have this gulity feeling. Will my mum think that i am pushing my baby to her or what? But, i checked with her before. She said that it's fine and she totally love taking care of my baby for me during the weekend. And becos of her, i am able to get rest during the weekend. Spend sometime alone with my hubby.
Most importantly is communication. Check with your relative or friends if they are available to babysit your child for awhile. While you go spend sometime alone with your girlfriends or hubby.
Don't worry, this feeling is perfectly normal. You won't be a bad mom just becos you take a few hrs off from your baby.
Take Care!

Kellie - posted on 03/29/2009

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haii im a 22yr old single mum of a 2yr old n a 1yr old its crazy at my house but when i wanna brake i feel so bad aswell in the end its best for boh me and my girls because it gives us all a braje from each other.........

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