I just need a little advice

Letisha - posted on 09/10/2009 ( 5 moms have responded )

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my sons father wont help its just me in him i have nobody i have to quit my job things are so stressful wat should i do please help me fellow moms

5 Comments

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Leah - posted on 09/11/2009

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Try to remember that it's all for him. I divorced my husband when my second child was just six weeks old, my daughter was 20 months without a job or place to go. I was fortunate enough to go to my moms and get back on my feet. He was never involved from the day I left. Now, five years later I have a job I love, my kids are happy and healthy, and I just bought my first house.

This too shall pass... breathe hun, breathe. Trust yourself. You will find a way to get through this and be the bets mom your son could ever have!

Best wishes!

Nikkita - posted on 09/11/2009

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Quoting Lauren:

 He quit every job once child support was taken out. THEN he moved to a totally different state thinking this was going to help him get out of it and he was wrong! They found hiM!



This is so sad, but at the same time it is HILARIOUS! Sometimes guys can be sooo stupid!  As a matter of fact, it sounds like something that the father of my child would do as well. It's like if they can find every job you go to, you don't think they'll find out out of state too?! WTF?! Thanks for the advice though Lauren. That's something I need to do as soon as my baby gets here.

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Go get wic and go to your local family social services and get all the benefits you can... make sure you have his social.. if you don't no biggie they will find him. If you get tanif- this is emergency money that will act as child support. Once they find him, they will track him with every job he has in the US. My ex husband left me and my son and thats the first steps I made. He quit every job once child support was taken out. THEN he moved to a totally different state thinking this was going to help him get out of it and he was wrong! They found hiM!

Nikkita - posted on 09/10/2009

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I'm still pregnant, but I only hear from the father of my child between 1-4am. He never answers my phone calls, or responds to my texts. I send him appointment times and addresses, but he never shows up. And when he does call me, he talks bs thens wants me to come over there to spend the night with him. He doesn't want to be there for me or our baby. However, he says that he still wants to be together, but I only hear from him once or twice a month. So, although my baby's not here yet, I understand what you're going through.

Melissa - posted on 09/10/2009

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I completely understand!!! My son's father only comes around when it's convienent for him... financially and emotionally. He went from January to the end of July this year without even calling our 5 year old!!!! It was heartbreaking to hear my son ask why his daddy didn't love him enough to call or see him..... his dad's excuse was "LIFE GOT HARD SORRY" --- he couldn't understand why I didn't accept that as an answer because as you well know.... just because one parent can't be there for the child physically or finanacially... it doesn't eliminate the problem! The other parent ( YOU and I) have to pick up their slack and find a way to give our child whatever it is they need. It's just what a responsible parent does.... babysitting is a part- time job....PARENTING isn't. Unfortunately, besides taking him to court for child support..... there isn't much you can do about him not helping.... except TAKE HIM TO COURT!!!! Alot of the child support issues can be handled without an attorney... of course an attorney helps but YOU can do it on your own.....I have! I'm a single mom of two kids... I have since worked my way through college (in my last semester) .... I have had to do without to provide for them...but a mother does what she has to do for her child.... REMEMBER: You never know just how strong you are until Strong becomes your only option!!!

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