I lost my mom to become a mom....

Maja - posted on 04/16/2009 ( 21 moms have responded )

7

4

0

Hi everyone,
My name is Maja. I have a 5 month old boy - Adam. Three months ago I lost my mom to cancer - she fought it for almost 5 years... so I truly believe that Adam was sent to me to help me cope with the situation... not to mention that I lost my job while on FMLA...

I'm hoping to meet some new mom's in my area and just get back into getting around people as that was kind of hard when taking care of my mom, working, and the whole life situation.

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Myra - posted on 04/18/2009

1

13

0

When I lost my mum (cervical cancer) I was engaged. It happened 6 years ago and I terribly missed her. I was a bit low when I walked down the aisle coz she's not around. I was literally looking around the church hoping to find her watching me....but she's not there. Whne I gave birth to my daughter, I am still looking for her, thinking that she will "pop" in to give me support.....I still hope that she's around so she cna advice how to be a great mom like her. Still wishing to see her so I can formally introduce my husband and my daughter. Until then, it will be just a dream.



Children will push you to stay strong. I wish you well.

This conversation has been closed to further comments

21 Comments

View replies by

Ana - posted on 07/03/2013

2

0

0

I'm so sorry for your losses and I can relate, whatever that is worth. My mother severed relations with me two years ago and I haven't heard from my mother or step-father, who raised me from the time I was three, since then, not even to congratulate me on the birth of my daughter. The birth of my daughter is the best thing that has ever happened to me. She is absolutely incredible. But I have felt the loss of my family more deeply since her birth, and sometimes I feel so sad and alone. I helps to know some of you have experienced something similar - moms without moms who are still alive. Thank you for reading and I wish you all the very best.

Joni - posted on 04/21/2009

22

25

4

My mom died when I was 8. I now have a 7 month old daughter, who looks just like her :) My mom's name was Mari Beth, my daughter's name is Bailey Elizabeth, but wwe call her Bailey Beth :) She always jabbers when she is by herself, we have decieded she is talking to Grandma :) Just think of it the way I do. Your son will ALWAYS have someone there with him. I know my mom is always watching Bailey Beth:)

Alexandria - posted on 04/18/2009

2

0

0

Hi,
I lost my mom in 2004 and got pregnant with my first a month after she passed. It was so hard to deal with not having my mom around. My mom had brain cancer and battled it for 2 yrs.

If you need help with anything message me anytime.

Felicity - posted on 04/18/2009

4

10

0

Im sorry to hear about your mum. My grandfather died just after I was born so I never knew him but my mum told me a million stories about him to me and he got to see my mum as a mother and she tells me how proud he was of her without saying a word.
The lovely thing about a new generation is the life line never ends and a part of your mum is within your baby boy, and the mothering love your mum gave to you will be reflected in the mothering love you give to your son.
xxx

Jennifer - posted on 04/17/2009

2

2

0

very sorry about the loss of your mother. i too have lost quite a few loved ones to cancer as well. my fiance' grandmother just passed in feb of pancreas cancer. we are doing the relay for life marathon next month to raise money for the cancer society.you should look into the walk and do it for your your mom there is probably one in your area. if you dont want to walk you can purchase a luminere to burn in memory of her too. good luck with your new little one!!!

Gabrielle - posted on 04/17/2009

3

25

0

Hey Maja, I am so sorry for your lost and I feel your pain. I was 8 months pregnant, living in Maryland when my mom passed away from cancer in Ohio. I was 2 cent. dialated and was not allowed to travel to Ohio for her showing or funeral. I fully believe that my son (my second child) was sent at that time to help me cope and be the wife and mother that I needed to be. Without my little guy, I don't think I would have survived. My mom passed on the 19th of August, and I gave birth 6 days later. I noticed you said your in WI. I am now living in Kenosha. Feel free to drop me a line any time you need to talk. My heart goes out to you sweetie. Congrats on your beautiful baby boy!!

Maja - posted on 04/17/2009

7

4

0

I want to thank you all for great support and all the responses. This time is SUPER hard for me as I've been through all of my mom's treatments, surgeries... I was her caregiver as she didn't speak English very well. My mom was everything to me, she was my best friend. I know that she "visits" Adam (my son). One time at night, when he was asleep, I know she was there watching over him, b/c my dog was terrified to go into his room.

Again, Thank you all for great support.

Nikki - posted on 04/17/2009

74

20

12

wow that's a lot to deal with i lost my grandma in 2007 the day after Christmas she suffered from Alzehimers. That morning she died at around 10am and at 3:00pm i went to the hospital for my first ultrasound and found out it was going to be a baby girl. I cried and named the baby Emma Anne after my grandma. The sad part is everyone knew in September I was pregnant and around Halloween my grandma said take care of my great grandchild cause I wont be around to see her. It's hard but you got your buddle of joy i beileve when someone leaves the world we are blessed with someone in there place--ood luck with everything by the way i live in Ripon Wi and have family in Cederberg wi as well as Brookfield wi.

Amanda - posted on 04/17/2009

4

24

0

I'm so sorry about your loss. Something kinda like that has happened to me. On June 17th of 2008 my grandpa passed away from cancer that he had gotten from fighting in the war in vietnam. In November of 2009 I discovered that I was pregnant and due June 15th, two days before the date of my grandfathers death. I truely believe that God is sending my family and I this baby to fill the void that my grandfather left when he died. Needless to say, my son will have his great-grandfathers first name as his middle name. Landon Curtis Sledge; I just wish my grandpa was here to see him.

Rebecca - posted on 04/17/2009

11

6

0

I believe children are a blessing indeed. When I was pregnant with my son, I lost 2 very important people to me. I was closer to my great grandma than anyone else in the whole world. She was the one person that was like a friend and a parent all in one. She passed away just 16 days before my son was born, and her service was 3 weeks after his birth. I felt almost at peace while rocking my son to sleep in front of her urn and picture. Like I was finally introducing them.

I am sorry for your loss though. I know all too well what you are going through.

Jocelyn - posted on 04/17/2009

64

11

10

I'm so sorry for your loss. I also lost my mother in law to cancer in August. She passed away 2 months before my sons 1st birthday and I agree with you that my son did help us to get through the hard times! She was only diagnosed 2 1/2 months prior to her passing away and we spent every single day with her in those months. I was the only one in the family that wasn't working so I became her caregiver up until we had to put her into a hospice to have 24hr nurse care.

It's a daily battle dealing with the loss of a loved one and so far I don't think it's gotten easier we've just learned to deal with it a bit better!

I started working from home because I found after she passed away I didn't know what to do with myself...I went from running around all day to doing nothing and couldn't handle it!

One thing I've learned is never take life forgranted and to hold onto those around you because you just never know when they won't be there anymore.

Charith - posted on 04/17/2009

3

24

0

I am sorry to hear about your loss, I know what you are going through. When I was 21 I had my 3rd child and then got temporary custody of my 8 year old sister, 3 weeks later our mother passed away and her dad has pretty much dissapeared and only comes around when he wants. Since then I have had another child and gotten married to my childrens father. It has been 7 years May 21st and I still miss her as much today as the day she passed. I don't think it ever gets easier but I do look at my son and remember the last memories with my mother. I remember how much she loved us all and I know because I had my kids to take care of that it helped me cope with everything. We do remember my mom on her birthday and the day she passed but baking her a cake and sending a balloon to her in heaven. I started this to help my 8 year old sister cope with it all and now my kids all love to show grandma that they are thinking of her on these days as well. If you need someone to talk to just message me.

Kate CP - posted on 04/17/2009

8,942

36

758

Did they fire you while you were on FMLA? Cause legally they can't do that...

I am so sorry for your loss. It's so hard to lose some one that close to you. Personally, I believe in reincarnation...soft of. I think Adam will have a spirit like your mother's and you will see her in him every day. I wish you the best of luck on your new adventure through parenthood. *many hugs*

Connie - posted on 04/17/2009

7

4

1

I am sorry about your mom...my mom almost died last summer and for a moment I thought she was. In that time I felt so alone and scared, so I cant imagen how you feel. To have a baby on top of all that ....your a strog person, I dont think I could have handeled that. Feel free to add me to your cercle or facebook .....Im from VA...you

Chrissy - posted on 04/17/2009

2

16

0

sorry to hear about your mom. something like that happened to me also. on february 3 2006 i delivered a still born baby. i was 37 weeks and the cord was wrapped around him. i was the toughest thing i had ever gone through. the day after i had him i was still in the hospital and i was on the phone with my husband and he says to me let me call you back i smell something burning. i was like great first i just lost my baby and now my house is on fire. so when i finally talked to him later he said the hot water heater caught on fire in the basement. and the just the way the basement was set up the whole house probably would have went up in flames and of course none of the batteries were working in the smoke detectors. so if i wouldn't have been in the hospital on the phone with him we would have probably been sleeping at home and never even known it. my oldest son was 3 at the time. so they say everything happens for a reason and i believe that. not even 3 months after we lost our baby boy brayden i found out i was pregant with my daughter natalie. and she looks so much like the baby we lost.

Mapule - posted on 04/17/2009

8

1

2

Hi,im really sorry about your loss hope you manage to get your life back on track and may your little angel grow and see many more blessed years.God be with you always.

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms