I"m a single mom and I fear that depression is setting in

Cesci - posted on 10/30/2013 ( 5 moms have responded )

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I am 38 and I have two wonderful children. My daughter is 9 and my son is 6 and he was diagnosed with autism 3 years ago. These last 7 years have been very very hard on me. I lost my little brother, my grandparents died, my marriage ended (that was actually a great thing because he was abusive). The highlight was finding this great guy who I was completely in love with who end our relationship after almost 2 years because he decided that kids were to much to handle (doesn't help that I have to see him every day at work).

Recently my mom moved out because she found a new relationship and I now have to short sale my house because I can't afford the payments. Due to my marriage any close friend I had are gone. I have no support system, I have found myself actually reaching out to my ex boyfriend but he instead tells me that he is dating now.

I have started working out but I am always exhausted. I don't know what to do. I'm really tired of my same routine but I have no help, my family is always busy doing their own thing.

I'm hoping that I can get some really good advice that I am able to actually do. Because I'm on my own I really am not able to go to a councilor.

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Thando - posted on 10/31/2013

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I have been there. Time to pamper yourself! ask a friend or family member to watch your babies. Take a long bath or nap or even stroll through the mall. Anything you liked doing before the babies. When I am cranky I tend to lash out and feel even worse cause I know my babies don't understand. So I wake at 4 every week day and pretend to be 21 again. ha ha ha, funny but it works. I drink tea in silence and do a bit of exercise if the babies are still sleeping. Sweating also helps me get stress out. Pamper yourself, pretty lady! YOUR WORTH IT

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Jane AJ - posted on 11/04/2013

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The only courage that matters is the kind that gets you from one moment to the next. (Mignon McLaughlin)

This is not good advice that you can actually do.
But I just would like to pat you to escape from your deep sorrow.

Cesci - posted on 10/31/2013

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Hi Michelle,

Your right they weren't my friends to begin with. I had tried to reach out them after my separation, they are all married and now I'm not, so after a few non returned calls I realized they weren't friends.

I am taking your advice and I'm looking for a support group so I can start making new friends and just have a few moments where I don't here "MOM" all the time :).

Thank you

Michelle - posted on 10/31/2013

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Have you thought about getting a boarder in to help you with the house?
Does your ex husband pay child support? Do you have any court orders in place with the children's Father?
You can't rely on your family for support, you need to find the balance for yourself. I was a single Mum for 5 years without any support from family so it can be done.
Why have your close friends gone because of your marriage breakdown? If it's because of no longer being married then they weren't true friends to start with.
Find a Mother's group or some other school Mum's that you get along with. Have coffee dates and build up relationships with the other Mums.
There are heaps of ways to expand your friends and support base, you just need to go and find them. They won't come knocking on your door.

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