I'm so sorry

Andrea - posted on 11/29/2013 ( 1 mom has responded )

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Hey Ladies,

Although I'm older than you I wanted to write something because my heart was touched by all your comments. I had a tubal ligation when I was 27, my husband was contemplating being "fixed" when I found out I was pregnant. They all thought it made sense for me to have it done since I was scheduled to have a c-section. Deep down I didn't want to do it, but wanting to be pleasing to husband I chose logic or heart. I'm 41 now and still long to have more children, I looked into adoption, foster care and at the end the closest I could get to fulfilling that longing was an exchange student for a year and running a home daycare. The bottom line is my husband didn't want anymore and disagreement has been a struggle for many years. Seems strange that a woman can go get an abortion without anyone's consent, but they can't get their tubal ligation reversed without there husbands consent, but that's not the topic here. I just wanted to tell you if you are young and can get it reversed, then do it. I have yet to meet a caring mom that ever regretted having their child once he or she was placed in their arms. Raising kids is hard but it's worth it. And if you happen to be on here and you regret it and know your husband will not agree to changing that...I want to say something to you that no one ever said to me...I'm so sorry. I know how that feels and you are not alone in your sadness. Some choices we can change, some choices we can't and done unfortunately are no longer ours to make. I pray that you will not resent your husband (if you do) and are able to forgive him standing in the way of a tubal ligation reversal. After 14 years my husband said to me he was sorry, although I appreciated it, it's too late to fix what we did. Don't wait if you have a willing husband. I have had nothing but female problems since that decision, emotional sadness and resentment...I guess this is my way of trying to let it go and help someone else to change it if they can while they still can. Love to all of you.

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Andrea - posted on 11/29/2013

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Sorry, this was in reference to the "regretting your tubal ligation" conversation...I'm new and didn't realize the discussion had already been closed.

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