I'm Tired and feel alone, motherhood is harder then it looks, anyone relate?

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Kiara - posted on 07/28/2013

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Definitely agree about bring tired and alone! My fiancé works two jobs and I'm constantly home alone. I move 1200 miles away from family four months ago & he's the only person I know here.. Also it's hard to make friends being a stay at home mom with no car and no job. :/

Sandra - posted on 07/08/2009

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You know being a stay at home mum is tough! I have twins that are turning 1 in 3 days! Its hard...u never know wat mood they will b in..if u will be able to get the housework done...the cooking done. My kids are in a routine now where they have two 2hr naps and thats my time to clean up and to have some alone time....even still there are some days when i go crazy...you just clean up and its a mess again as soon as they wake up!!! You love the kids dearly but there is a desperate need for time alone/with ur spose. I have 2 friends that i keep in touch with and it doesnt seem like enough! even to go out for an hour is like heaven...u miss the kids and when u come home u feel refreshed and calm which is better not only for you but the hubby and also the children!! Hope everything is goin well...

Mykediva - posted on 03/22/2013

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I quit my stressful advertising job so that my husband and I can get pregnant. I still do makeup gigs on the side but majority of my time, I am alone with my now 3 month old child. I am breastfeeding and cloth diapering. So my day pretty much consists of feeding, facing pee and poop, laundry and some other chores. I am lucky though to get a break once a week when the cleaning lady comes in. My husband lets me stay at my parent's place once in a while so that I can rest more. My mom, aunt and sister help out but since I breastfeed, I still can't be far from my baby that much. I reserve my pumped milk for when I have a gig. Anyway, I know it sounds like I have no right to be tired because of my breaks BUT I am tired. I love my baby to bits. But sometimes, I get so exhausted and overwhelmed that I feel like I am going to puke. Still, I put my brave face on and just cherish the positive side of motherhood. Although, I just wish that people around me say, "poor thing" when I tell them I'm tired instead of asking me, "why are you tired???"

Jessica - posted on 07/08/2009

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Being a mum is a very thankless job and constantly leaves you tired with no time for your self, I had to laugh at my self the other night my youngest 19 months old was not settling and finally about 1030pm she went to sleep so there was i with my bowl of water razor and towles shaving my very hairy legs and underarms while studying for Nursing exams that are coming up and trying to organise someone to cover a shift for me at work so i can be at my eldest daughters 5th birthday. It was nearly 1am when i finally went to bed and then was up at 5.30am to begin the day all over again. I ended up with PND after my second and the only thing i can say is thank god i have a husband who actually listened to me and helped me out when i have needed it. I had a melt down recently and was sitting on the kitchen floor crying my eyes out and at the end of my rope. I had hit my wall. My husband sat down next to me and asked me what was wrong. I explained that i couldn't do it all and that i had hit the wall and couldnt get over it. My husband leaned in gave me a great big hug and said don't worry i have a four wheeled drive and i will knock that wall over then it won't be there anymore. I couldn't help but laugh. It hasn't always been this way and it took me to say to my husband one day after he had arrived home and exclaimed that i have been home all day and should have cleaned the house. I had a 4 month old and was pregnant with really bad morning sickness, so didn't really feel up to cleaning. When he said that to me i was livid and said to him that if he thinks he can do a better job then he can try and i grabed my hand bag and keys and drove out. He soon realised that being home with the kids by your self is a hard job and you need that time to your self and with adults some times just to have a decent conversation sometimes. Keep talking and make sure you keep talking about what you are feeling whether or not he is listening to you. Write how you are feeling in a journal and rationalise everything through this. Good luck with this.

Amanda - posted on 07/07/2009

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Yeah I know a lot of people who lose friends because of the mom thing. Lucky for me I didn't have many to begin with so I didn't have to lose much. If anything I have gained friends since I got pregnant, in other moms. It's interesting that you said you had PPD and a little boy. I read somewhere that younger mothers who had boys were more likely to get PPD. Maybe since you did not go to the doctor about it, you are having some of those feelings again? And anytime:) That's what these things are for!

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User - posted on 08/17/2013

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im twenty now and married....I mother of one right now but have less than 3 weeks before my lil bundle arrives....im stressed out and feel completely trapped in my own lifestyle.. I fell in love instantly with a guy who is 9 yrs older than me...we connected instantly...I never wanted kids but he wanted to so I hopped on bored and figured I've got experience with babies and kids of all ages...well soon enough I was pregnant and had a girl who is now 1 yrs old I felt alone because I was always stuck in the house and he always worked...he expected me to work, cook, clean, and watch his friend child ... I cant be around kids 24/7 I snap and breakdown and lose my mind...well we got married that same yr....later in early 2013 I find out im 3 mnths prego and im panicking cuz I know I cant handle this im depressed tired of being a mother a lover and wife...I havent had alone time without my child around me or with someone always needing something.... I wanna go to school, travel, work, hang out with my best friend or go out for a little while and jut relax and not rush to get home or go out just me and husband and not worry about money problems or other things that cause me and him to argue so much.... he wants 4 kids and im breaking down and crying every nite cuz I hate my life its more than I bargained for

Alexandra - posted on 07/08/2009

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I think Any mom can and does relate. We all get a little lonley. I am having trouble adujusting to my role as a SAHM. I feel like I need to be super mom and get everything done and have every dish clean and every t shirt put away. Its just not possible, and it ok. I have a new found Faith and it helps me get threw everyday. Just keep your head up and tommorow is a new day! :)

Jennifer - posted on 07/08/2009

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yeah we were having a really difacult time and now we have time to talk about all the little things that aren't so important for the kids to know or hear :) and great to have adult talk. talking to my 4 year old all day can drive anyone crazy so :)~

Jessica - posted on 07/08/2009

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That is a great idea and definately one for the freebies. Nothing better than actually having a decent conversation with your spouse.

Jennifer - posted on 07/08/2009

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i think alone time is the key. i have a 4 year old and 2 year old and we have one night a week when we go out alone(no kids) and then also about 2-3 a month where we go out alone, no kids or spouse. since we have started this it has helped up alot.



and we don't alway spend money when we go out, we go for a walk on the river or just hang out under a big tree for adult talk and so on.

Michelle - posted on 07/08/2009

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My daughter is 7 months old now, she sleeps through the night and is a really good little baby, i couldnt ask for a more relaxed child. Even so i am still constantly exausted and feel very alone at times, my man works long hard shifts and does 10 or 11 days in a row somtimes so i spend alot of time by myself. Ive joined mother and baby groups and i go swimming once a week where i have met other mums so that has helped. Im actually goin back to work at the end of the month for 2 days a week. Logically it doesnt make much sense because after paying for child care i wont really be left with much money but i need to do it for my sanity. I used to be a very outgoing person before i had my daughter so staying home alone with a baby all day has been a really shock to the system. I wouldnt chane it for the world but it would be nice to get out now and then.

Heather - posted on 07/07/2009

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yeah we go to the park just about every other day, which is nice because I get out and enjoy the fresh air but I don't know. I have no real friends, when I got pregnant all my good friends stopped talking to me, cause I was doing the mom thing. I had post pardon depression after I had my son and I never went to a doctor to do anything about it, I think I'm just tired. thank you for talking, it always helps to have someone to talk with

Amanda - posted on 07/07/2009

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Have you tried going to a park? Do you have any other friends with children that you could maybe have play dates? Being a stay at home mom is a job. And just like you need vacations from any other job, so do you when having that one. (I just had to do a report on this for school) Maybe you could see about getting a part time job somewhere. That would give you an alternative route, and also make you "want" to be around your child when you're off. (not saying that you don't now) I am new at this, but I am sure it is frustrating for you. Yes, I am very tired. They say to sleep when she sleeps, but I find it impossible.

Heather - posted on 07/07/2009

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Quoting Amanda:



Quoting Heather:




Quoting Amanda:

I can relate to you. I love being a mother, but it is difficult! Even though my husband helps with our newborn, I still feel alone in it. I am breastfeeding her so I am the one who gets up with her and loses sleep. When we have tried to giver her bottles, she doesn't like them so well. So that leaves me with being the only one who can feed her. I am very exhausted all the time and do not know how I will manage when I return to work. Hopefully by then she will be on a better schedule.







Do you guys (you and your husband) every go out with friends? I just feel trapped my son is 3 now but I feel like all I do is sit at home while he works, at least with work he gets a little break from the kid, but I'm always home. I dont work and hardly ever go out. I feel like going crazy sometimes.









She is only four weeks old, so both of us have been out of work with her so far. He goes to the gym daily so that gets him out of the house. I do not get to get out everyday though, and he never feels like going everywhere after coming home from working out. So besides people coming to see us and the few times we have been out to eat with family, I have been here at the house. I can see where you feel that way! Have you talked to him about feeling like that.





I have but he feels like my job as being a stay at home mom is so easy and I should have nothing to complain about. He thinks I need to suck it up as harsh as that sounds. Dont get me wrong I love being a stay at  home mom,  but I just feel depressed all the time i was 18 when I had my son and I'm tired I just feel like I cant do it anymore, I want to break down and cry to someone but I feel like no one is there to listen.



How are you doing though, 4 weeks, thats really young I bet your tired!

Amanda - posted on 07/07/2009

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Quoting Heather:



Quoting Amanda:

I can relate to you. I love being a mother, but it is difficult! Even though my husband helps with our newborn, I still feel alone in it. I am breastfeeding her so I am the one who gets up with her and loses sleep. When we have tried to giver her bottles, she doesn't like them so well. So that leaves me with being the only one who can feed her. I am very exhausted all the time and do not know how I will manage when I return to work. Hopefully by then she will be on a better schedule.





Do you guys (you and your husband) every go out with friends? I just feel trapped my son is 3 now but I feel like all I do is sit at home while he works, at least with work he gets a little break from the kid, but I'm always home. I dont work and hardly ever go out. I feel like going crazy sometimes.





She is only four weeks old, so both of us have been out of work with her so far. He goes to the gym daily so that gets him out of the house. I do not get to get out everyday though, and he never feels like going everywhere after coming home from working out. So besides people coming to see us and the few times we have been out to eat with family, I have been here at the house. I can see where you feel that way! Have you talked to him about feeling like that.

Heather - posted on 07/07/2009

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Quoting Amanda:

I can relate to you. I love being a mother, but it is difficult! Even though my husband helps with our newborn, I still feel alone in it. I am breastfeeding her so I am the one who gets up with her and loses sleep. When we have tried to giver her bottles, she doesn't like them so well. So that leaves me with being the only one who can feed her. I am very exhausted all the time and do not know how I will manage when I return to work. Hopefully by then she will be on a better schedule.


Do you guys (you and your husband) every go out with friends? I just feel trapped my son is 3 now but I feel like all I do is sit at home while he works, at least with work he gets a little break from the kid, but I'm always home. I dont work and hardly ever go out. I feel like going crazy sometimes.

Amanda - posted on 07/07/2009

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I can relate to you. I love being a mother, but it is difficult! Even though my husband helps with our newborn, I still feel alone in it. I am breastfeeding her so I am the one who gets up with her and loses sleep. When we have tried to giver her bottles, she doesn't like them so well. So that leaves me with being the only one who can feed her. I am very exhausted all the time and do not know how I will manage when I return to work. Hopefully by then she will be on a better schedule.

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