i want another baby but my husband doesn't

Maggie - posted on 06/05/2009 ( 14 moms have responded )

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so..my husband and i have a 20 month old son and am wanting another baby. my husband is wonderful and really great with him, so i thought that having another baby would just be natural. but bless his heart he's worried about supporting another baby, and he just won't even talk about another baby. what can i do?

14 Comments

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Cathleen - posted on 06/08/2009

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Quoting Maggie:

i totally want like 4 kids too! but it seems like every time i bring it up he shoots me down right away and asks why we would want another one when he is so perfect and at a great age. he wants babies to be born at 1 year old! ;)


Oh my goodness, I'm in the same boat.  Mine didn't want the first, then she was born, and he can't get enough of her! I know he'll feel the same way about another one!  I only got a few more years, and I was 3 more!  Mine is 9 months old, he thinks it's amazing everything she can do right now and says that we should enjoy the one we have until she doesn't want us anymore, but then she'll be in school and I do'nt want to start all over at that point, at that point, I want to be in school also!

Cathleen - posted on 06/08/2009

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Well, I feel the EXACT same way. We're younger parents, we're 18. We had our daughter 9 months ago, and because of some medical condition in my family (we release 2-3 eggs a month) we don't know how much longer I will be fertile for. I want 3-4 children, and I wanted to start trying for our second now, but my hubby doesn't want our children to be close (him and his sister are 12 years apart). I want my baby to have siblings also! I'm trying to talk him into it, but it's been a steady "no" for 4 months!

Mel - posted on 06/08/2009

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oh sweetheart i feel for you my partner is worried about the same thing not being able to support another one we have a 14 month old he is waiting for his capstone to get his apprenticeship out the way and knows as i do if hes still in it we wil not be able to afford another child. however its unlikely so im trying to get him to realise we will be well of by then. anyway we both believe when it is the right time it will happen. all i can say is talk about how good it will be for your little boy to have a sibling close to his age. i personally think the closer the better good luck hun

Jess - posted on 06/08/2009

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Thats no good, everyone needs to have a baby brother or sister. it may just be a little to ealry but by the time ur second bub is born if u were to conceive now ur first bub would be 2 and a half. weigh up ur options, do u think u have another money between the two of u to support another child comfortably? Good luck.

Kate CP - posted on 06/06/2009

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Quoting Ashley:

I didn't give my husband a choice in the matter... he doesn't want another baby for a few more years, but I refuse to wait, so this will be our second month trying for baby number 2.


You don't give him a choice? It's his kid, too! That's really mean and unfair to your husband and to the baby you're trying to concieve. You're supposed to be partners, not opponents, in your marriage.

Katie - posted on 06/06/2009

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Quoting Jackie:

i have 3 under the age of 3. my oldest will be 3 in august, my middle one just turned one in april. that is a great spacing. it wasn't that difficult, my last was born 5 days before my middle one turned one. let me tell you, if i knew then what i know now, i soooo would have waited. things are so hectic and insane. and so much more expensive with 3 different diapers, food and formula. i think it's sweet he's worried about supporting another one, it's really tough and scary sometimes. but then is there ever a good time to wait til you can afford it?? if people did how many of us would have kids :) good luck hon, when it's right, it'll happen.



 



How is it having 3 under 3?Right now I have a 19 month old and a 4 month old.I would like to try and have one next year when my son turns 3.I am hoping for another winter baby since both of my children are winter babies and opposite sexes so I have everything for both.Just wanted to know though how difficult it was!(I personally found that 2 children is easier than just one!)





 

Jackie - posted on 06/05/2009

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i have 3 under the age of 3. my oldest will be 3 in august, my middle one just turned one in april. that is a great spacing. it wasn't that difficult, my last was born 5 days before my middle one turned one. let me tell you, if i knew then what i know now, i soooo would have waited. things are so hectic and insane. and so much more expensive with 3 different diapers, food and formula. i think it's sweet he's worried about supporting another one, it's really tough and scary sometimes. but then is there ever a good time to wait til you can afford it?? if people did how many of us would have kids :) good luck hon, when it's right, it'll happen.

Shannon - posted on 06/05/2009

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I'm glad I'm not the only one with that problem. Men are just very stuborn, but maybe it's like everything else, if you make them think it was their idea then its a great one. Children are expensive but if you were worried about money then you would have none. like the other mom said there is no perfect time to have a baby, and it usually happens at a very imperfect time. I hope that you two can come to an agreement. good luck

Amelia - posted on 06/05/2009

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your baby needs a friend...who wants to be an only child? that's no fun, they'll be able to entertain each other when they are older rather than the parents having to. plus the second is NOT as expensive as the first, you already have everything, especially if it's the same sex. I love big families! never a dull moment.

Ashley - posted on 06/05/2009

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I didn't give my husband a choice in the matter... he doesn't want another baby for a few more years, but I refuse to wait, so this will be our second month trying for baby number 2.

Rachel - posted on 06/05/2009

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We have 2 kids and it was such a blessing that my older one was 3 when the baby came. She was a big help and she could play by herself and she was out of diapers. Maybe your husband will be more receptive if you waited a little bit.

Kimberly - posted on 06/05/2009

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My husband and i have been thinking about getting pregnant again too. But maybe your hubby has a point though.Just think how much easier it would be for the two of you if one baby is out of diapers and cheaper too

Maggie - posted on 06/05/2009

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i totally want like 4 kids too! but it seems like every time i bring it up he shoots me down right away and asks why we would want another one when he is so perfect and at a great age. he wants babies to be born at 1 year old! ;)

Katie - posted on 06/05/2009

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I feel the same way as you.I have 2 children right now a boy and girl and my husband wants no more.He says we have one of each so he is happy.I would like 1-2 more but he is very persistant about not having anymore.I keep trying to talk him into it, but so far nothing works.Maybe yours will give in for you, Good luck!

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