If my ex is saying horrible things to mour 5 year old do I have a right not to answer my phone?

Stephanie - posted on 10/13/2012 ( 5 moms have responded )

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Basically when my ex doesnt get his own way he takes it out verbally on our 5 year old daughter or me, I have decided not to answer my phone as the last time he did it 3 weeks ago he really upset my daughter. I told him to not ring me and sort out through a solicitor and courts so he can see her. Am I doing the right thing? I have had this prblem with him for 3 years and have had enough of seeing my daughter hurt and let down. Really need some advice. Totally at my witts end. Myself and my husband want to go to a solicitor but we cannot afford one so we have to wait for my ex to (as he lives on benefits) he has done nothing. The only thing he has done is send me abusive texs and threatening texts so I have involved the police too, they cant do anything but tell him off! My daughter hasn't said a word about him since. I am all for children to see there fathers and I have never stopped him before no matter what he has said or done but after what he said the other week it was the last straw!!

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Cheryl - posted on 10/14/2012

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totally agree hun honestly your to nice if that was me i would band him all together its enough to say bad stuff about you but to your 5 year old nah hun i would not be able to handle it just tell no more until court i know you may not like to do that to ur daughter but you need to stand your ground and be tuff and protect her if he really cared he wouldnt do that to her at all

Stephanie - posted on 10/14/2012

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Cheryl I do record everything, I have done since the start. I have even had to get the police involved because of his abusive and threatening phone calls. I just dont know what to do for the best. I understand that almost every dad should see their child and I am not denying him but I need it through courts so they can finalise evrything and he realises that it isnt right to talk to a 5yr old like that and he should keep his feeling towards me to himself, I do because of her. I had it with my parents and it was horrible. My daughter does not deserve to deal with this.

Stephanie - posted on 10/14/2012

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Jodi he rings my phone to speak to my daughter, we agreed every sunday 10am through solicitors years ago. I have to put my phone on loud speaker so she can hear him. And she sits in the same room as me when he phones, I dont ask her to she just does. He gets nasty and arsy with her when she wants to play and not talk. Then he texts me and tells me off. I keep explaining that she is 5 but he doesn't care. And when he has her he tells her that she cant do certain things with him because I will shout at her, when that is not true. She asks me why she cant do things even though I said she could.

Cheryl - posted on 10/13/2012

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if that was me i wouldnt answer the phone either and i would tell him not to ring and you will see him in court and the other keep all the nasty stuff he has sent you through text record dates and times he ring and write down exactly what he says to your daughter so when you do go to court use it against him your daughter dosent deserve someone like that in her life even if it is her dad and maybe he will stop and realise it hurts her when he is nasty to her being only 5 sorry thats wrong luf for him to be doing that to her and i wouldnt trust someone like that around my kids

Jodi - posted on 10/13/2012

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Is he calling you or his daughter? And are the phone calls court ordered (i.e. are there court orders that say he can call his daughter at certain times). And how do you know he is saying things to your daughter? Are you listening in?

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