Mommy-attached

Shanda - posted on 07/07/2009 ( 6 moms have responded )

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My 11 month old is so attached to me, she hardly let's anyone else ever hold her, and she' s never been away from me for more than a few hours. And my two year old is like that as well, he's gotten even worse lately.

6 Comments

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Jen - posted on 07/07/2009

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Quoting Kate:



Quoting Shanda:

they have lot's of cousins and we see them regularly, it's usually just when I get ready to go somewhere, like the grocery, they throw a fit for me whne I leave, and my husband gives in and lets them go with me.





Well, that would be your problem. You and your husband need to present a united front and when you decide something then that is it. When you go out, say to the grocery store just say "I'm going to the grocery store. I love you very much. I will be back soon." Give them hugs and kisses and walk out. Don't hesitate, don't turn back around, and don't give in no matter how much screaming and crying there is. It's going to get worse before it gets better. So far they have learned that screaming and crying means Mommy comes back or they get to go with Mommy. It's going to be hard, and it's going to take some time, but if you and your husband can work together on this then your kiddos will be fine. :)





I agree. I think they've probably learned that by throwing a fit daddy gives in and lets them go with you. The 11 month old could still have a little bit of speration anxiety, but the 2-yr-old should have out grown it by now. Are their aunts and uncles willing to watch them for a few hours at a time in order to give you a break and teach the kids to be less mommy attached? I think that is something they will outgrow, but you may just need to get used to them crying when you leave. It's hard, but we don't want mommy attached preschoolers lol :)

Kate CP - posted on 07/07/2009

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Quoting Shanda:

they have lot's of cousins and we see them regularly, it's usually just when I get ready to go somewhere, like the grocery, they throw a fit for me whne I leave, and my husband gives in and lets them go with me.


Well, that would be your problem. You and your husband need to present a united front and when you decide something then that is it. When you go out, say to the grocery store just say "I'm going to the grocery store. I love you very much. I will be back soon." Give them hugs and kisses and walk out. Don't hesitate, don't turn back around, and don't give in no matter how much screaming and crying there is. It's going to get worse before it gets better. So far they have learned that screaming and crying means Mommy comes back or they get to go with Mommy. It's going to be hard, and it's going to take some time, but if you and your husband can work together on this then your kiddos will be fine. :)

Shanda - posted on 07/07/2009

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they have lot's of cousins and we see them regularly, it's usually just when I get ready to go somewhere, like the grocery, they throw a fit for me whne I leave, and my husband gives in and lets them go with me.

Deidre - posted on 07/07/2009

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Are you able to go on playdates with the kids? Around other parents and kids their age. That may help them become less clingy, at least for a short while. And after a week or two of going on playdates maybe you can switch off with babysitting kids with someone... have them watch your kids and you watch theirs which may also help with teaching them to not be so clingy (could also backfire). Also, try really hard to encourage independent play... especially with your 11mo old since she is younger and I suspect it'd be easier to do this with a younger child than an older one.

Shanda - posted on 07/07/2009

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I can't afford day care, unfortunatly, and I don't think they'd ever stay, any more ideas?

Jamie - posted on 07/07/2009

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I think you should try enrolling them in a daycarea few days a week You ar creating big problems for yourself and for them. get them involved and less depentant on you;

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