My 12 month old won't sleep in her crib but likes my bed, is it time for a toddler bed?

Chantelle - posted on 12/10/2008 ( 8 moms have responded )

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she will sleep fine with me but not alone in her crib. When she gets left it in she freaks. What can i do to change this situation? Is it time for her own toddler bed?

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User - posted on 08/10/2012

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i have a 13 month old..we had a similar problem with him, because i lived in a one bedroom apartment and i shared my room with him for to long. when i finally moved him in a room by himself we had a hard time getting him to sleep through the night, what we did was put him in his crib and when he cried i just went in layed him down with out saying at word at 5 min intervals for the first week usually after 15 mins he stopped and went to sleep now i put him to bed at 830 and i dont hear from him till the morning at about 8, just letting him work through it on his own helped a lot, now at just a year i have a perfectly independent boy who stays in his bed until i come and get him, and if he wakes in the middle of the night, he usually just goes back to sleep by himself... it only takes a week of crying sometimes 15 mins or sometimes an hour, if you can do that then it will be the best thing you ever did

Aimee - posted on 12/11/2008

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i have an 18month old son and he is in a toddler bed. The thing is that hes in my room right next to our bed. He does fine with it. Sometimes i hear him fuss and he gets on my bed but i figure he has a bad dream or needs the contact. I put him back after he falls asleep just to reassure him that he cant sleep in my bed. My fiancee is a bed hog and i have to fight for my spot the way it is! He really likes his toddler bed and if we are in the room and hes tired he will put himself down on his own bed. I love how in the morning he comes and cuddles with me first thing. =) It wouldnt hurt to try getting ur child into a toddler bed since u will be buying one anyway. Oh and u really have to baby proof when they get the toddler bed so if they get up in the morning they arent dissecting ur nightstand or dumping ur water on u..... that was a fun wake up. lol. good luck.

User - posted on 12/10/2008

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My sister had this exact same issue with her son. She started allowing her son to sleep in bed with them because he would cry in his crib and she didn't know what to do to make him stop. Once diagnosed with cancer, she was not able to comfortably allow her son to be in bed with her any more. She started putting him in his crib and letting him cry himself to sleep. The first few times she would go in after 10 minutes or so to put him back down and try to calm him. Some nights she would sit outside his door crying as he was crying in his crib for over 45 minutes. After a few nights of this the crying became less and less until he just went to bed in his crib with no fuss. He is now 2 years old and STILL in his crib.

Good luck!!

[deleted account]

Here is what I did. Put her to bed and let her cry for 5 minutes. Go in and check on her. Don't pick her up, just talk to her and let your know you are there and everything is ok. Make the visit brief. Then when she starts to cry again, let it go for 10 minutes before going back in. Again, Don't Pick Her Up and Make It Brief! Next time around, wait 15 minutes before going in. I never let the time last more than 15 minutes but if you are comfortable with waiting longer, go for it. This way she will learn that you are still there for her and won't just leave her. She also will realize that when you put her to bed, that is it. No amount of fussing will change the fact that she is in there for the rest of the night.
I got this tip from a parenting book a few years ago and used it on both my kids. It took awhile to condition them, but they ended up being the easiest kids to put to bed. They only cried when they really needed something, like a diaper change.

Emily - posted on 12/10/2008

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No way can you put your 12 month old in a toddler bed. Put her in her crib and if she can get out after you lowered it all the way down, then buy her a crib tent. Works like a dream, and such a peach of mind.

Julie - posted on 12/10/2008

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Whoa! 12 months is way too early for a toddler bed. I didn't switch my son to his twin bed until he was almost 3, but that was more because he had no interest in climbing out of his crib and it was nice to know he was safe and wouldn't get in to trouble before we got up. ;)

You need to stick with the crib; if you allow her to continue to sleep in your bed, you need to be prepared (and willing) to allow it for the next few years. Sometimes you have to let them cry it out; she is obviously at an age where she can't express why she's upset, but she is old enough that she should be learning to self-soothe. It may take time, but it's important to be committed to it and be consistant. Good luck!

Ps- I KNOW it's heartbreaking to hear them cry, but as a parent, you have to learn how to let yourSELF hurt in order to be the best parent you can be. :)

Michelle - posted on 12/10/2008

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Hi. Boy does this question bring back memories of my daughter. The only way I got her into her own bed was to put the crib in my room for awhile and got her used to sleeping in the bed then I moved it to her room and yes it took a few nights of tears (both of us!)> Good luck!

Jovanne - posted on 12/10/2008

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I heard you don't want to move them to a toddler bed too soon, or they will constantly crawl out and come to you. I believe it's sometime around 2 yrs old. My daughter also likes to sleep with me too because I'm probably nice and cozy and warm. I put her to bed in her crib, but she always ends up with me by morning. I have to though so we all get enough sleep. So, I obviously need some help to! Good luck!

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