My boyfriend lied about being sterile now I'm pregnant...

Michelle - posted on 07/27/2012 ( 1 mom has responded )

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My boyfriend lied about being sterile now I'm pregnant...yea, I fell for that. I'm going on 6 months pregnant now. I think I was too excited about the pregnancy in the beginning to think about how devastating it was to have a male partner to lie about something so serious and what it would mean for me at this certain stage of my life. I'll be good for a couple of days but then the depression of it catches up to me and I'm back at square one. I hold it against him when it suits me for reality hit home, and I have realized how much my life is going to change, thanks. He says I need to get past it because the depression and craziness is not healthy, which I can agree. But I also feel misled because he moved into my house to help out and I had this lalala picture in my head that we would get married and have the happy family. After he moved in, he made it clear that we weren't getting married either. So I've had to go through my job/career, my family, and friends...all wondering what is going on with me and this guy that I chose to go down this path with. I've already started doing the homework for appointment with counselor. Should I just go by myself or look for couples counseling? Every day that passes just feels a little bit worse for me because I'm stuck with this guy and baby, for real.

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Jodi - posted on 07/27/2012

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You are NOT stuck with the guy. He is the baby's father, but he does not have to be your partner. He lied to you about something extremely fundamental, and obviously is not at all sorry about that. Why are you choosing to go down this path with this guy? Seriously? Personally, I'd be kicking his arse to the kerb, because this is an A level lie. Why are you contemplating an ongoing relationship with this person?

I think there are two major questions here you need to ask. The first is to him. Why did he lie about being sterile? The second is to yourself. Why do you want to maintain a relationship with this man other than as the father of your baby (which can be done without the two of you being together)? Counselling on your own would probably be a good idea if you can't answer these questions.

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