my boyfriends is cheating on me over the internet and phone. help!

Jaclyn - posted on 02/18/2014 ( 3 moms have responded )

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Last week I went through my boyfriends phone and found pictures of this girl that he met over Facebook. They weren't just pictures of her face if you get what I'm saying. I confronted him about it and said that he had told her to stop and that he just wanted to be friends with her. I thought that it was weird because why would anyone want to be friends with someone who's trashy like that. I asked him why he didn't delete the pictures and he said his phone wouldn't let him. A few days later I asked him to get rid of the pictures and that I didn't care how he did it but just to do it, to stop talking to her over the phone and through Facebook. He told me okay but I know that he still talks to her and she is still on his Facebook page. I'm trying to decide if I should email her or not. And here's another kicker, she is married with two kids and lives in a different state then we do and I found out about two weeks ago that I'm about 45 days pregnant. Any ideas on what I should do would be great because I feel as though I'm losing my mind and all this stress isn't good for me or my baby.

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Michelle - posted on 02/19/2014

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You can't treat your boyfriend like you do a child and make him do what you want him to do. He is an adult and he can make his own choices.
That being said you need to have a calm discussion with him about how it makes you feel, not just telling him to get rid of the photo's and don't talk to her. You aren't his Mother and the more you tell him what you want him to do the more he will keep doing it, like any child.
Have you told him you're pregnant?
If not, then sit him down and tell him you're pregnant and how him keeping in contact with this woman is making you feel. Let him know that if it continues you will have to seriously think about where your relationship is going.
Be honest with him but talk with him not AT him.

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Jaclyn - posted on 02/19/2014

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I have told him I'm pregnant and he says he's excited but he just doesn't act like it. I have talked to him calmly about this before and that didn't seem to do anything so I decided I had to be harder. We are always the kind of people who talk things out instead of fighting but it just wasn't going anywhere this time.

Mary - posted on 02/19/2014

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he needs a wake up call if the shoe was on the other foot what way would he react i think you should take some time out for you and have a deep look into what you want and where you are going he is not going to be your top responsibility anymore and i will tell you straight up if you think you have problems now wait until baby comes because it is hard work and if you and your partner cannot get through this problem before baby arrives its going to escalate. like michelle said sit down and talk things out.

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