Need help!

Bridget - posted on 06/11/2013 ( 1 mom has responded )

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Hi, I am a 24 yr old mother and step mother. My stepson is 5 and my daught er is 13 months. My fiancé has 100% full custody of his 5 yr old son. ( his mom has not attempted to make contact with her son via birthday/Christmas cards, phone calls or anything of sort in years!). I have been around since the 5yr old was a little over 18 months old. I am having major behavioral issues with our 5 yr old boy. He does not listen. He does not show me any respect or regard for rules especially when dad is not home. Which its quite often a he works alot. His dad and I have a wonderful relationship and barely ever argue. So I am not sure where he is picking up his battling argumentative behaviors. I know he has quite a bit of emotional distress for a child of his age because despite his young age he remembers his mother and talks about her all the time. But everything is a fight with him. Even simple things like what I made for breakfast or changing his dirt because hewot it dirty. And when I say fight I mean screaming yelling kicking stomping the works. We have had serious heart to hearts with him. And have let him know how much we love him and what is expected and each talk seems to be followed by worse behavior. don't know what to do! Please help. There are alot more details but I fear if I get started I will ramble on forever. Lol.any advice would be greatly appreciated!
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Chantal - posted on 06/18/2013

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I don't think conversation is going to get you very far. You can implement discipline and still ensure him he is loved. My husband and I have my 4yr old grandson more than his mother. Sometimes he acts up because he misses her which is understandable but, that is no reason to allow bad behavior. We simply re direct him. If he is throwing a fit we put him in his room (door open) and let him know that when he is done, he may come out. When he is done, we reassure him that he is loved and it is the behavior we don't like. Be persistent and he will figure out that tantrums don't solve problems they just earn you a time out. Good luck!

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