One son circ'd, one son intact? Anyone else?

Merry - posted on 10/13/2010 ( 40 moms have responded )

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Hi my son Eric is circumcised, it was a long debate between daddy and me and in the end I was ok with it because my obgyn was so helpful in reassuring us that she takes every pain control precaution to make it easier on him. It went well, really he wasn't in much pain, and I was happy with the procedure. But as I research, I realize that my style of parenting, AP, and my beliefs on most everything are really in the same crowd as the anti-circ community. I feel like i needed to do more research to see if I was wrong. Well as I learn even more I dig into medical essays and statistics etc I decide that my gut instinct was right, I am not for circumcison. Also when Eric was about 1 we found out his circumcision had reattached and I had to, over the course of a few weeks, slowly rip back the skin off of the head. Needles to say that was the most torturous and horrid thing vie ever done or seen. It was intensely painful for him and he still is scared for me to touch him penis during baths or diaper changes because he. Remembers the pain. Just awful. So with the medical advise being that it's not necessary,or even very beneficial, and along with our misfortune with erics reattachment, vie decided that if the baby I'm carrying now is a boy we aren't circumcising him.
My husband wants to read up on it more but I know I can show him the same things that made me decide against it. But he worries that sincere is circ and so is Eric that brendan (future son) will be somehow the odd one out.
I think I have him convinced that first off, I don't think our sons will really be staring at each others penis too much, and even less so at dads penis, and if they do see dads penis they mostly would notice the hair difference other then the skin. And when they do notice that each others is different I feel quite strongly that I can simply explain that we did it for Eric because we thought it was best, and we didn't do it for Brendan because we found out we didn't have to. And that you are never going to be just like anyone in the world, we can't live our lives trying to be the same as each other. And that as brothers they can't be always comparing each other, they are different and they always will be.

Anyone have sons with different circ choices? Or a dad is, son isn't situation? Or any insight to the matter?

WARNING circumcision is a sensitive subject, keep in mind that everyone is entitled to share without being attacked or argued. Do not turn this into a debate about circumcision vs intact. Respect the intentions of this question please!

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I know this isn't what the conversations about but it's funny how so many people think it's fine to circumcise a boy but when female circumcision is mentioned they are horrified. At the end of the day IMO they are both genital mutilation. And I don't agree with piercing a babies ears either.

Amanda - posted on 10/15/2010

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Sara- If the circ was done later in life, anesthesia could actually be used. More often than not, there is no anesthetic of any kind used with newborns. PLlus, there should be no medical need to circ later in life if the proper, Don't retract, only clean what is seen , statement is followed.

Laura-There are lots of families out there who go through the same thing that you are contemplating right now. You have plenty of time to talk to other families on how they addressed the issue. I am glad that you have come aboard the intactavist wagon! For more information check out www.savingpenises.org and www.thewholenetwork.org They both have FB pages too, so you could post your question there and get really good advice. I personally am not sure how to address it as my husband and son are both intact and this little one(due in Jan) will be left intact as well.

Jessica-It is actually very easy to care for an intact penis. You don't do anything. Just clean what is seen. You clean off the penis like a finger. Never, ever retract the foreskin. It will happen of its own accord sometime between toddlerhood and puberty. No one should retract a foreskin except for the owner of that foreskin. Once the foreskin is retractable, there is no need to go crazy with the cleaning. Rinsing well in the bath or shower is suffiicient. It is the same approach women should have towards their vaginas. Too much unnecessary "cleaning" (douching, etc) will cause an imbalance in the flora of the penis or vagina and that is when you end up with infections.

Rachel - posted on 10/19/2010

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Okay, when I was pregnant my midwife asked me "So, do you plan on having the baby circumcised?" I said "No." right away. I had already decided that it was a totally unnecessary procedure and I was 100% against it. This was one of the only times my husband was able to come to my appointment with me and he gave me a weird look. He's circumcised, and I know he hadn't thought of it before, but all of a sudden he was forced to. I asked him in the car what he thought. He said "Well, I'm circumcised, and I turned out fine." So, we got home and I got out a few parenting books (the all natural, attachment parenting, breastfeeding, cloth diapering, hippy kind), and said "read this". He did. Then he agreed with me. My six year old showers with my husband almost daily and has never even noticed the difference. And cleaning and care has never been an issue. Good luck!

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Okay - It seems like this did turn into a circumcision debate! Well, I have three sons, and one of the three is circumsized. They are now 5, almost 4 and almost 1. They have all seen eachother's penises and they have never asked even once about the difference. They all bathe together or one right after the other everyday and they have not once asked about a difference. Daddy is also circumsized, so, we did circumsize our first as it was the norm where he was born and we were young and well Daddy was so we did it. Before our second we moved and got a family doctor that we trusted that we talked to about circumcision. He advised us that it is a personal choice, but a cosmetic choice, as there is no medical need to circumsize. We then talked about it for the rest of the pregnancy and decided not to circumsize our second son. It wasn't even up for discussion for our third we just knew we wouldn't do it. I have no problem with the looks of an uncircized penis or a circumsized one. They are both fine. I have not had any issues with any of my sons penises and would now recommend leaving baby boys intact. They can always choose to do it themselves later in life if for some reason they hate it. I am not sure why they would?! But, then again, we all have things that we don't like about ourselves, some people get nose jobs as adults, but we as mothers do not get them nose jobs as babies because they have a big nose! haha

Chelsea - posted on 10/18/2010

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I don't get the "Look the same" debate either. No two penises look the same, period. Do us women go around comparing our labia and clitorises to our moms and sisters? Ew, I hope not.

Babies are born perfect. Why alter that state? If it's for the sake of preventative care, let's all lop off our tonsils, appendixes, breasts, and labia, too, because that's how much sense it makes.

I also don't get why people circ their sons because it looks "weird" with a foreskin. Making a permanent physical change for your son based off of your own preferences? Seems twisted. I highly doubt you're going to be seeing his penis when he's a teen or adult. Don't want girls to judge his penis or be grossed out when he's intimate? Well, I wouldn't want him to be with a person that is going to judge him by how his penis looks...Shallow much?

Erections on circed guys and intact guys look the same, just pull back the skin. Some you don't even have to.

Explaining differences while potty training, that's easy. ALL PENISES ARE DIFFERENT. Wow, you have extra skin and I have less, but we both have them. How hard is that? I hope you all teach your children to embrace differences.

BTW, here's my favorite article that sums up how I feel about it (hopefully it posts): http://mothering.com/all-things-motherin...

Please don't feel bad for your previous decisions, OP. All we can do is learn from them and make better choices in the future. :)

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Jessica - posted on 10/19/2010

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It is a tough one. When I had my first, it was first decided that he would get cut because 1) his father was and 2)being the immature child he is, wanted to avoid the 'why does my pee pee look different from yours?' question. We didnt know much about it then, and I felt like that was Dad's decision to make so I left it to him. The day he was born, he suddenly decided he didnt want him getting it done anymore(maybe because I told him he'd have to take him, as I dont have the heart to listen to a baby cry like that :( ) So we backed out of it, and he remained intact. but when baby #2 was born(different father) he wanted it to be done, and he didnt care about going to the appointment. I did do a lot of researching on it as well, and I was a little on the fence, but when we had the best pediatrician in our area performing the surgery, I calmed down a little. He assured us that not one of his surgeries had to be corrected, or resulted in any kind of infection(that was my biggest worry) So now I have one son who isnt circumsized, and another son and his father, and an ex who are all circumsized. I know my oldest will have questions about why it looks different cause kids do notice these things, but like i told the father, it is up to you to explain to your son why you chose not to do it.
There are pros and cons to both sides, so just make sure that if you are against and hubby is pro, clearly define your points on why it shouldnt be done, and perhaps you'll sway Dad's mind. Or maybe he'll bring something up that will make you change your mind, but either way, like the other Jessica said, you are a partnership and need to agree on the decision. Dont just go ahead with it to make him happy, and same for him. And its not about having to do it, no one has to, usually its just a cosmetic issue. I hope you both can come to an agreement, and do what we do best as parents and make the right choices for our LOs :)

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My sons father and my son are both intact while my fiance is circumcised. My son is 7 now and he did ask once but explained to him the reason I made the choice I did and he seems fine with that. I did notice that my son a couple yeast infections so just be very careful to keep everything both clean and dry and everything will be fine I'm sure. If kids are old enough to notice things like that they are also old enough to understand what you tell them (in my opinion anyway). Best of luck to you!

Merry - posted on 10/19/2010

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Thankyou brittanie!!! That's exactly what I was hoping to hear. I knew it wasn't common to have made different choices in one family but I thought eventually I'd find someone who had this experience!
Thankyou, this helps a lot and I think it will help my husband too.

Jennifer - posted on 10/18/2010

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you're right, laura. sorry! this topic gets me a bit riled up. my most recent response was because of how many women posted their reasons for having their son circ'd, which also isn't what the post is about. i think this topic can be similar to the breast/formula debate. chosing to have ones son circumcised does not make one a bad mother. we all do what we feel is best for our children at the time.

i found this article for you...i honestly haven't had time to read it yet though so i'm not sure if it will be any help, sorry!
http://www.interfaithfamily.com/life_cyc...

Merry - posted on 10/18/2010

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But, necessary or not, as long as the proper care is taken to keep pain controlled, it's not 'barbaric' like some have called it. I think it's like piercing a babies ears, some are ok with the risk and pain, but it's up to mom to choose for her child.
But.....this isn't a debate, it's support and recommendation for brothers being different.

Jennifer - posted on 10/18/2010

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whether it hurts a baby to have the procedure done or not, i think thats beside the point. the point is that boys are born with a foreskin for a reason. the foreskin serves a purpose, its not just there for the hell of it. so, why surgically remove a perfectly functioning part of a boys anatomy? Muslims and Jews (and the number of uncircumcised Jews is on the rise) routinely circumcise as a part of their belief system but ALL medical and health organizations agree that circumcision is a cosmetic procedure, not a medical one. many american health insurances are starting to refuse to cover the cost of circumcision because of this.



for anyone who cares, this is an amazing article...

http://mothering.com/health/the-case-aga...

Christina - posted on 10/18/2010

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I agree with that. I sat with both my boys when they were circumcised. I know for a fact they were not traumatized because I held their little hands during the whole thing. Also, you can get numbing gel now so there is no pain at all with the procedure.

Megan - posted on 10/18/2010

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There are pluses and minuses both ways. I know my husband who is not circed, feels that he is way more sensitive and can enjoy sex more because it isn't constantly rubbing against stuff, but I have heard other men say the opposite. I know someone whos doctor messed up the circ when he was a baby and will always have pain when he gets an erection, I know someone who got an infection who was not circed and it caused the foreskin to start to grow closed and he had to have surgery for it. I have read study's that go both ways about which is better.

What I can point out is it is not really much different than my own parents choosing to have my elder sister christened and they chose not to go through that ceremony for me. There is no physical aspect I guess but they made it very clear that they believed one thing when my sister was born, and something else when I was born. The change in thinking was still there and explaining that was the key. As long as you make it clear to both your children you were making the best choice you could at the time, it should not be a problem.

Merry - posted on 10/18/2010

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Heather, I will answer your questions as it seems you truly don't understand but really care!

"I believe you are wrong about your boys seeing eachothers private parts..... boys are boys and also what about potty training???"
I will potty train each the same, theres no difference in function circ or not, just appearance

"Daddy and big brother will help him out! "
And they can help with or without a foreskin

"How are you going to explain it to him once he old enough to understand? "
I will say, everyone is different and you will never be exactly like anyone else

"And even if the son who isnt circ'd understands what are you going to explain to the one who is??"
I will tell him that some boys are, some boys arent and as he gets older i wil explain the theories that we believed when he was born were not the way we believed when his brother came along

"What's daddy going to say?"
Well dad says that why would we put our son through a painful surgery with possible complications when it isn't necessary

"How are you going to teach him the difference?"
Its just a penis, its not who he is! Just a body part

"Reading books and physically being able to guide your son through the trying times is different."
Yes but since only about 30% of the world is circ, it csnt be that big of a deal

"And what is your uncirc'd boy continually gets yeast infections and the skin grows to thick and has the keep being pulled away?"
That is so very very rare, ive never heard of it. And medically speaking there's NO reason to circ, just a personal cosmetic choice

" I think that would hurt more!!!?"
I'd bet my sons reattached skin being ripped off the head of his penis hurt worse

So in conclusion, I repeat what I said earlier, if Eric needed hearing aids, should I get them for Brendan too just so they look the same? Same with eye glasses, or maybe color contacts! Or dye hair, I mean why do their sexual organs have to match, what about adopted brothers where their skin is different colors? Or brothers where one has a physical handicap, being the same isn't possible, or even helpful I think!
And so, since circumcision isn't medically recommended, I do not think it would be fair to put any boy through it for no medical reason, whether or not brother and dad are, it's just not fair to put him through the pain, and possible complications for cosmetic reasons!

User - posted on 10/18/2010

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I believe you are wrong about your boys seeing eachothers private parts..... boys are boys and also what about potty training??? Daddy and big brother will help him out! How are you going to explain it to him once he old enough to understand? And even if the son who isnt circ'd understands what are you going to explain to the one who is?? What's daddy going to say? How are you going to teach him the difference? Reading books and physically being able to guide your son through the trying times is different. And what is your uncirc'd boy continually gets yeast infections and the skin grows to thick and has the keep being pulled away? I think that would hurt more!!!?

Merry - posted on 10/18/2010

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Yes, the unknown has a tendency to be weird to us. But remember that world wide only like 35% men are circumcised. So in a broad sence, the circumcised men are the unusual ones.

Personally I see both ways as weird, I think penises in general are weird :) but since I'm finding out that living as close to natural as possible tends to have the best outcomes, I'm perfectly happy to keep future sons normal.

Before you do circumcise,please look into it a lot, you will find the best ways to help your son deal with the pain, and all the reasons why it isn't recommended by any medical organization. It's good to know the risks too, some small, some permanent, some life threatening before you put your baby through the surgery.

And if you do choose to do it one day, MAKE SURE YOU GO WITH HIM. If it's safe enough to put your baby through, then it's only reasonable you would stand by his side for the surgery. He would need your support through the pain.

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Honestly uncircumcised creeps me out. It looks alien to me, and that actually makes sense saying that I didn't even know about it until I was 14 and my nephew was born.

I plan on circumcising my boys. I don't want to be creeped out by my own sons. My husband wants our sons circumcised.

I knew one guy who was circumcised at 22 because he kept getting infections (from yeast to others that he didn't divulge). He also had painful erections. I don't want my sons to have to deal with any of those things.

I think your husband as valid concerns, it's just a matter of showing him that everything will be ok; which from the sound of it you are doing. My husband is, his father isn't, it was just a matter of fact for him and nothing became of it.

Michelle - posted on 10/17/2010

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i have a 20 month old son and a 22 month old step son..for me and my husband there was no question we wanted our sons circumcised...My step son, my husband had no say because we were unaware that he had another son untill about 3 months ago..but he is intact..the mom couldnt give a reason did no research just didnt feel like having it done...the only persoon that i know that is intact..was a close friend back in high school.. he got infected..and had to have surgery. his exact words to me were "i wish my parents cared enough to have gotten me cir."..He sat in my car and cried about hating the way it looked and everything..i felt so bad...he had the surgery to get him circumcised after we graduated and he is so much happier..Every person is different..and has different views on what is best for their child. I never thought about it till i read some of these post...one day we're not only gonna have to explain why their 2 months apart. but we're gonna have to explain why one is cirm and one is intact.

Christina - posted on 10/17/2010

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All three of our kids are circ'd, and we did it for our own reasons. We are happy with our decisions and our choices, and we have no qualms over them, nor do we feel they were wrong. Our boys are happy, healthy boys.
The thing I would like to state here is that be very careful when you explain to your son why he is circumcised and his brother is not. Even though you are against circumcision, you still had the procedure done for your oldest and you do not want to make him feel that he is disfigured or has been violated by it, even if your beliefs scream that he has been. The way I would probably proceed in explaining it to the boys when they ask questions about why they look different when they are older is that big brother had some complications with his circumcision which is why you opted against it for the second.

Merry - posted on 10/16/2010

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Kymberly, I'd suggest you read on askdrsears.com it has a lot of info on circumcision and all the latest facts on how to choose.
Obviously I'd lean towards not doing it, but I won't judge anyone who does because obviously I made that choice once.
But that said, please do your research well and choose for every child as an individual.

Kymberly - posted on 10/16/2010

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This is a really good topic. I'm pregnant with our second child and will find out in December what we are having. If it's a boy my husband and I automatically assumed that he would be circumed because my husband is. I guess I never really questioned what could go wrong but after reading these post's I'm deffinatly going to look into it farther. Thanks to everyone that put in advice and didn't get into an argument! :D There are a lot of ummmm "mean" people on these boards...and I'm really starting to dislike all the arguing :/

Rebekah - posted on 10/16/2010

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First off, I have a boy and a girl. One has a penis, and one has a vagina. They look different, and it's perfectly okay. So, the "they won't look alike" argument isn't a very strong one, IMO.

Second, to the eye, I have one brother that looks circumcised (b/c he had a minor hypospadia at birth, that was corrected to look circumcised) and one brother that is intact... And, as far as I know, growing up, they never looked at each other and said, "I want a penis like that," in the same way that, they never looked at me and said, "I want a vagina like that." It was never an issue growing up.

HOWEVER, I'd feel like I was lying if I didn't add that my now 19 year old brother, has said on several occasions that he wishes he'd been circumcised. In fact, he was one of the main reasons we talked with our pediatrician about circumcision, watched a video of her perform a circumcision, and then decided to circumcise our own son... BUT, I don't think his desire to be circumcised had anything to do with the fact that his brother looks circumcised.

Good luck with your decision.

Sarh - posted on 10/16/2010

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I'm sure he will be fine and if it is anything like my fiancee's it does not hinder sex life (obviously w/us having a son). You said you are currently pregnant...? Stop stressing over this and just relax, enjoy playing and learning w/your little boy. It's not your fault mommy!

Merry - posted on 10/15/2010

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I think it happened because my obgyn said she usually takes less skin off then normal to ensure that it isn't too tight. But I think she left a bit too much because it was still high on the head and since we didn't know to pull it back it just did it. I hope he will be ok with it but it sucks to think about my choice affecting his future sex life :/ didn't need to be thinking so much about whether or not his penis works well......

Sarh - posted on 10/15/2010

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It doesn't really cause him pain, but it seems to become like raw easily... I'm guessing due to being such a thin layer of skin?? his attaches right under the head (touching the head) to the shaft... It is not your fault!!! You didn't know that was going to happen! Did it happen maybe from not keeping enough petroleum jelly on it and it sticking to itself and just re-attached that way?? Don't blame yourself!! You shouldn't feel guilty! I accepted my fiancee's being this way and sounds like your son's is not as bad, and the older he gets the less you may be able to tell!!!

Merry - posted on 10/15/2010

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Sarh, does your husband have pain with it? I'm worried that there is a small part underneath erics penis that is still attached, but it's so close to the sensitive spot under the head I don't have the heart to pull at it anymore. I'm going to ask his dr next week but I might need to see a specialist, I just hope he doesn't have permanent damage from it or need surgery to fix it.
I seriously now have to accept that my choice for him could negatively affect him the rest of his life.
I feel like I might have 'wrecked' him.
It's not easy to live with the guilt.

Sarh - posted on 10/15/2010

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I'm glad to hear that there will be family available to help your sons w/any questions. It sounds like you seriously have your heart set on leaving it intact. I believe the same thing happened to my fiancee as to your son, but his mother never did the procedure in which you had to do, either that or the doctor who did his circ did it incomplete... only a certain area is like a web where it is attached and you can see a great deal or scaring (much lighter pigmentation) on an area just below the head. He is very self conscious about this and was quiet embarrassed at first w/me. And I know it still bothers him even though I could care less!!
Also, I never realized that it was about half and half of american's one way or another... thanks for sharing that statistic.
I'm sure your sons will appreciate what ever decision in which you choose for them.

Merry - posted on 10/15/2010

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Yes I feel like either way you choose it can go wrong, if you choose circumcision it could reattach, it could be uneven, too tight, too loose, infected, blood loss.
With leaving it intact you could face phimosis, or scarring from early retraction, or infection from bad cleaning later on.
I just feel like honestly speaking the risks for circumcision are far more likely then the risks for intact and I don't want to choose something for my son that is not recommended by the world and country health organizations.
Regardless of my husbands penis or my first sons penis. I feel like doing something for the sake of peer pressure is bad, and I should look at each son as an individual and not let previous decisions affect major choices like surgery.
I mean if Eric needed hearing aids I wouldn't get ones for Brendan just so they match! And a penis is so much more personal and private. I feel like either way you could have a woman not like it but I hope my sons remain virgins until marriage like we did so if their wife loves them, penis design isn't going to be a deal breaker! And since we will homeschool there likely won't be any locker room crap either. Not that I would put my son through unnecessary surgery just to please his future friends :) and since statistically only 60% of American boys are circumcised these days I feel confident that neither son would feel out of the normal.
As for families, my brother and three male cousins are intact. My adopted brother, brother in law, nephew are circumcised. So either son will have family "like him" to go to with questions if need be.
So thanks for the input ladies, keep it coming! And especially, thankyou for keeping this civil :)

Sarh - posted on 10/15/2010

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I'm not sure what I would do in your situation, but I think I would circ the second one as well. I think you guys might have just had a bad experience and I don't think it happens very often, but I don't completely disagree w/you on wanting to leave any future son's intact due to what you had to go through.
And children notice every last detail! lol. I'm not sure that your future possible son would necessarily not notice that daddy's and big brother's is different. It is very obvious whether circed or intact.
COMPLETELY up to what you and your husband decide. Like I had said I would still circ the second and any other future sons. My son showed no pain after his circ, I was in more pain then him and I can NOT even come close to imagining the pain your son and you went through w/what you had to do.

Bonnie - posted on 10/15/2010

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Laura, my husband is not, but both my boys are. My husband probably wouldn't have thought of it for our boys if it wasn't for me. Every man in my family is circumcised. In my husband's side of the family no one as far as we know is. My husband's sister's husband is not circumcised, but they chose to have their son circumcised (maybe because we did ours, but who knows). It really is a personal decision that you and your husband have to agree on obviously. To me, it would just make the most sense, that if you decided to get your first son done, then you would also your second son.
If you are not going to do it now, I wouldn't put your son through that down the road unless it's for a medical reason. The process is a lot worse the older a man is and it also hurts a lot more. I'm sure what ever decision you will make, in the end, it will be what you are most comfortable with.

Betty - posted on 10/15/2010

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It will make for an interesting conversation when they are getting ready to become fathers and go to you to talk about their own choices as parents. Eventually they will know if they have or have not been clipped and they will be mature enough to understand your reasoning by then.

Jennifer - posted on 10/15/2010

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My husband is not circumcised and wanted our son to be. I researched it, I talked to my OB, I talked to the doctor who was to be my sons pediatrician and I also talked to the person doing the procedure before I finally decided that yes, I would circumcise him. I don't regret it. I'm quite sure he will notice that his dad is different than him and I'm not sure what we will tell him. But my husband and I both felt like doing the procedure would be best in the long run.

Jessie - posted on 10/15/2010

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I just want you to know that I know this exact problem will come my way if we get pregnant with another son. Our son is circumcized and so is my boyfriend. I will readily and guitily admit that I didn't do any research on the subject, when they asked I let my boyfriend decide and that was that. now however after all the reading I have done I dont think I could ever allow it to be done to a future son but convincing my boyfriend will be a different matter. Go with your gut here momma. I think your children will be fine with 'different' looking penises.

Sara - posted on 10/15/2010

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i feel that it looks wierd my first and second son is cir and nefew isnt that was his parents choice but wont it hurt more if u wait to get it done when the boys are older

Merry - posted on 10/15/2010

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Thanks Jennifer, I hope I can choose my words wisely if that comes. I think I will just have to explain to Eric that as an adult and a parent it's up to you to make the best choices you can at the time. And I can tell Eric that we decided that circumcision was the best choice we thought of when he was born and then as medicine advances and we learn more we decided that for Brendan it wasn't necessary. Not that it's wrong to do it, we will just say that since it isn't necessary, we didn't have to do it for Brendan. I hope it doesn't come up until he is old enough to understand but I'm ok with the explaining. As parents we aren't perfect, we just do the best we can at the time we have to choose.

Jennifer - posted on 10/13/2010

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i can't really help from experience because my husband is not circ'd, and neither is our only son but i do commend you on doing your research. i am anti circumcision but as you said, that is not what this is about

whether you have a circ'd boy, or an intact one we should be teaching them that they will encounter other boys and men who look different than them and neither is wrong. teach our boys confidence, and respect for differences. this is easier said, than done, i know, but it will go a VERY long way.

yours will be a tricky situation because eventually you will have to explain to Brendan why you did not want to have him circ'd but you will have to do so without making Eric feel bad that he was circ'd. it can be done but will require a bit more sensitivity. I trust that you'll do fine, Laura, when the time comes!

Jessica - posted on 10/13/2010

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Well I really don't know what I would do in your situation. In the end you and your husband have to agree b/c you are a partnership and a person shouldn't just do what they want even tho they know their partner doesn't agree. Circumcision is soley the parent's choice. Before I had my son 5 and a half years ago I did some but not a lot of research...I knew that it was my choice and my child and that I would make whatever choice I felt was right. What I gathered even before I was pregnant is that boys and men who aren't Circ. have a lot more cleaning and care to do b/c of the extra skin. Also I have heard in a class that I took...it was a parenting class that taken in one part about the pro's and con's of both that boy/ men who aren't are more likely to develop cancer...I honestly can't remember exacts and that their partner is more likely to develop cervical cancer. Really I am very unbiased in the situation. I believe that every parent should do what they believe to be the best for their child. I am really not caught up on pros and cons of circ. and not. My son was born 5 and a half years ago and I can't remember everything that I did find out and I am now having a daughter so I haven't thought of that question. I do know that if they were wrong and my baby is born a boy that I would Circ. this one too...it is more of a cosmetic thing for me I guess. When I was pregnant with my son I really didn't know what an Uncircumcised penis looked like and after that I worked in a daycare and had a boy that wasn't. When I finally knew how it would have looked I decided that my son was better off having been circ. More men are then aren't and I wouldn't ever want my son to be uncomfortable with a woman b/c he wasn't is all. I REALLY want grandkids some day so I just don't want to limit my son's options when he is looking for a woman. This is just all my opinion...BUT I do believe that you should do whatever it is that you and your husband believe is to be the best choice!! It is completely up to you and how you feel about it! I understand after what you went through with your son that you wouldn't want to go through that again...I wouldn't either!

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