Out of control teenage daughter

Naomi - posted on 10/08/2013 ( 8 moms have responded )

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I am a 40 year old mom with a 16 year daughter who is out of control. She is dishonest, manipulative and extremely disrespectful to me. She totally disregards me as her mother or a person. She steals from me, she smokes marijuana and unfortunately it is not only for recreational purposes, she is addicted to it. The crazy thing is I cant even get her into rehab, the rehabs here, they either do not take girls or she is to young. The ones that will take her is far out of my price range. She will sneak out the house or just walk out even after I have said no, so that she can get her fix. She is very vindictive, if I call her on being high or try and punish her, she will lie about say her father, saying he is having an affair, she has even gone as far as accusing someone that he made sexually advances towards her, yet he was not even in the house, just so she could get her own way. I am at my wits ends, I have gotten to the point that I do not care anymore, if she runs away, it does not even bug me anymore, I enjoy the piece and quite when she is not there. I know I should not feel this way, but this has not only started now, I have been putting up with her verbal and emotional abuse for years, it just has got progressively worse as she has gotten older. Any advise how to handle and cope with this.

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Lori - posted on 10/13/2013

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Stay strong!My heart goes out to you!I know how painful it is when your own flesh and blood hurts you this way(especially a daughter) Anytime you need to talk feel free to look me up and know that you're not alone!

Naomi - posted on 10/13/2013

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I have got the police involved, I have reported her to them as a drug user and a runaway. The nice thing is they are more concerned for her safety than arresting a person using drugs. I am grateful for that. They advised that I can call them anytime and they will look for her, arrest her and hold her for awhile to try wake her up.

Lori - posted on 10/12/2013

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Im so sorry youre going through this.I went through the same thing,I tried counseling but she said it wasnt helping and that it was me that needed counseling,she had a lot of anger and hate towards me,I know I did the best I could and at this point I would try the C.R.A.S.H program,give her the ultimatum and call the cops if you have to!But dont allow yourself to be manipulated and used!Im sure you've been a great mom,she knows right from wrong now So use your parental authority!

Stacey - posted on 10/11/2013

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There is something I have read about four troubled teens called 'bootcamp' do some online research and see if you can get her in on your own if not next time she's high or leaves the house withoutpermission call the cops on her. Yes she might be arrested and put on probation but then she will be accountable for her actions. Also it won't stay on her record since she is a minor.

Shatoria - posted on 10/10/2013

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she is going on the wrong path get her therapy don't give up on her give her really tough love you got be hard on her remember your the boss you running the show she is just a child you have custody of her she is going to be happy in the future that you did that this Right now is just a phase and believe me she doesn't mean all the stuff she say she loves you your her mom And she going to regret she ever done anything to hurt you we only have one mom many people would love to still have there mother its a shame what we do to those that love us but its her life at the end of the day she is making life for herself harder and shortening her days it all starts now she has an opportunity to do right

Naomi - posted on 10/10/2013

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Hi Shatoria, her father unfortunately works away, he does not stay with us. He has just like myself tried to guide her. Unfortunately she is a very immature child you does not listen to reason, she only listens when she wants something. We are at our wits ends with her, she does not care about anybody but herself. It is very sad the person she has become, she is a very attractive girl, but her personality overrides any physical beauty that I used to see. I have tried to find a place for her to go, they cant take her for various reasons and the ones that will take her is far out of my price range.

Shatoria - posted on 10/09/2013

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Hi Naomi she's a child she does not know all she needs to know yet her minds not right she needs to get counseling or either put her in a center and shell come out when she is 21 or send her to camp she's still a child she needs to stay in her place by the way what does her father do about this ?

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