Should I tie my tubes at 24yrs?

Sheilka - posted on 12/09/2012 ( 42 moms have responded )

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Im 24 yrs old and pregnant with my 2nd child. I have a 14 month old boy and expecting another boy. My dr says she can tie my tubes or put the IUD but I'm so confused! Im not sure if I want any more kids later on since I'm still young!

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Ashley - posted on 12/17/2012

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i just read your comment about having lupus and not sure if you will have the energy for another in 5 years. if your condition is going to harm you and the baby, then maybe you should get them tied, but not if you think you will ever regret it. about the enery thing...i had 2 boys that were less than 2 years apart. i was so happy when they were out of diapers, and able to do somethings for themselves. i didnt have to have as much energy as they were growing. but then i gave birth to my 3rd son 5 years later. as my 2nd just started kindergarten. i was looking forward to them being in school until i realized i would be having a newborn at home, and would have to wait another 5 years to have a peaceful day. he is now 2 years old, and i sure dont have the same energy i used to! and he seems to have way more than my other 2 had, although i think it is just because im wore out. i love my kids, and would not change a thing. i enjoy being able to spend time with them, and love being home with my youngest all day. even though im still changing diapers constantly and chasing him around, and always cleaning up behind him. but it is definatly worth it. im not sure what lupus is or how it affects you or your baby, but if you really think you might want another baby in the future, and you think you could make it through another pregnancy and have another healthy baby, then consider all of your options before making your final decision. good luck and i hope it all works out!

Jen - posted on 12/13/2012

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i agree with jennifer.. a good friend of mine has had 2 kids and she wanted her tubes tied at 21..but her doctor told her they WILL NOT even consider it until she is 26 and at a mature age. I, myself do not wnat my tubes tied but have an IUD and although there are a decent amount of people it doesn't work for, there are many it does work for..I would give the IUD a try if i were you...I have a 5 year old daughter and have had unprotected sex on and off since and have never even had a scare..and no period (so that's also great although doesn't happen for everyone) and I'm on my second round. The IUD is good for 5 years....so yes i would agree with jennifer on that factor and Hope you figure everything out! Good Luck hun!

Amber - posted on 12/11/2012

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If you are questioning it then I would say wait! You don't want to do something you may end up regretting. Do the IUD and if you decide to tie your tubes later then it's no harm, no foul! That way you are still left with the option of having more if you end up deciding to! My husband and I decided after our two that we were done, but we had a boy and girl. We are also 29 and 30, so it made sense for us to be done (at least to us). We talked long and hard about it and it was the best choice for us. I hope you make the best choice for you. Good luck.

Feah - posted on 12/11/2012

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My aunt is 25, and her tubes tied 3years ago when she had my cousin. For her it was the right decision. If you are on the fence an implant maybe the way to go. They have a 10year one and the 5year ones.

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Shauna - posted on 01/11/2013

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Toni,
I am sorry to hear that you went through post natal depression. I went through it as well.With my first child everything was great and had no problems but with my second one I had problems and did suffer from post partum depression. It sucks. But while I was pregnant my fiance went to prison and missed the birth of our daughter and my step son passed away and that was all within months of each other. Not to say I also had to quit a really good job because of medical issues and my older daughter was backsliding in behavior and everything. I'm not trying to scare you, but more or less just wanted to let you know that not all pregnancies are the same and things after pregnancy and birth are the same.

Shauna - posted on 01/11/2013

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A lot of times doctors will not tie your tubes unless you are at a certain age and have a certain amount of kids. When I found out that I have cervical dysplasia my doctor said that he would do all the things possible that I wanted done to try and cure it and to help prevent me from having a miscarriage, but he would not tie my tubes because I am still young, 25, and I might want another baby. So I guess it just depends on the doctor in all reality. I personally wouldn't have your tubes tied just yet because you are only 24 and you may want another child. I would just do an IUD or get on some other form of birth control.

Lisa - posted on 01/10/2013

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Hannah, if you get your tubes tied, it cannot be reversed. Not sure who told you but that is not true. which is why so many refuse to tie tubes of someone so young. this case is obviously different given SLE but in general that's why we tell people to be sure they dont want kids in the future bc that decision is final once we stable and cauterize the tubes. Vasectomy can be reversed but does not guarantee pregnancy.

Donna - posted on 01/10/2013

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There is a SUBSTANTIAL risk for women in their third pregnancy with Lupus. This is not an everyday concern. This is a concern with a Lupus factor. Here is some information about Lupus and Pregnancy.

http://lupus.webmd.com/guide/pregnancy-l...

This site doesn't say it but complications with the disease raise exponentially after the third child. It's not just about having a healthy child. It's about shortening her life.

Hannah - posted on 01/10/2013

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I'm in the same boat. I'm 24, and just found out i'm pregnant with my 3rd ... was on the pill and everything ... our youngest is only 9 months. My husband won't get a vasectomy ... so i've got to decide if i want to get my tubes tied or wait and see if we want to have another! I have heard that either procedure can be reversed, although in some cases it is harder to get pregnant or impossible even after a reversal. Good luck! I'll be coming back to this post to see other people's opinions...it's a hard decision to make.

Lisa - posted on 01/10/2013

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generally we try not to tie tubes that young just because we have seen that so many do not realize this is permanent and you cannot simply untie them. (obviously this is not the case for all women) but then you never know if you might change your mind later which is why we try to recommend IUDs. one can last five years, another ten years, but if you change your mind you can easily take it out again. with SLE I am sure it is different and more complicated, but I would think on this for a while before deciding. if you are unsure whether or not you might want another child later, I would go with the IUD. If there is any doubt at all, do not go the permanent route.

Donna - posted on 01/08/2013

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My mother has lupus so I understand why you would want to. I think that if I were in your position I would because Lupus is supposed to rear it's ugly head the worst after the third child. On the other hand, honey if you want more, have them, you only live once. Just be ready for whatever comes after.

Valerie - posted on 01/02/2013

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I would say do the IUD because you never know what the future holds. I do understand why you would want to tie your tubes with your condition but if it were me i would wait and see. Im 25 with 2 boys and pregnant with my third when i have the baby i plan on getting the iud asap. because right now i dont want any more and i dont know if i ever want any more but I'm still so young as are you so like i said i would go iud

Feah - posted on 01/02/2013

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@Aurora

You need to do what's right for you. A doctor may not tie your tubes, but you can look into. My aunt go her's done at about the same age with one boy and one girl. If you do not want to permenatly the away your ability to have children use and implant there is a 5year one and a
10year one. I agree he is being selfish, try explaining to him how you feel.

User - posted on 01/02/2013

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Hi Im new to this but Im glad I came upon this. I have a wonderful 17 month old and I think I may be pregnant again, I took 4 at home test that showed very faint positives. In not sure if I'm truly ready for another one... my partner and I have been having this conversation for about a week and he's suggested me get my tubes tied. I will turn 21 in 2 weeks but I don't know if id really like too get it. I've suggested a visectomy but he says he's scared of having another surgery. I'm 2 years from graduating college but I do want to pursue more education and maybe more than 2 kids will make it more difficult... I feel he's being selfish by trying to push this on me when he's not the kind to want to use a condom. What do you think I should do?

User - posted on 01/02/2013

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Hi Im new to this but Im glad I came upon this. I have a wonderful 17 month old and I think I may be pregnant again, I took 4 at home test that showed very faint positives. In not sure if I'm truly ready for another one... my partner and I have been having this conversation for about a week and he's suggested me get my tubes tied. I will turn 21 in 2 weeks but I don't know if id really like too get it. I've suggested a visectomy but he says he's scared of having another surgery. I'm 2 years from graduating college but I do want to pursue more education and maybe more than 2 kids will make it more difficult... I feel he's being selfish by trying to push this on me when he's not the kind to want to use a condom. What do you think I should do?

Merrie - posted on 01/01/2013

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I wanted my tubes tied last year so I asked my doctor. He said that unless there is a health reason to do it, no doctor will do it before 30. He said even 30 was young and that I would have a hard time finding a doctor to do it then. I was so disappointed. I mean I take proper precautions to not get pregnant because my husband and I really only want one child, but I really wanted something long term and permanent. I guess we will just have to wait five more years :0)

Feah - posted on 12/31/2012

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Im glad you made the best decision for you! Congrats on the baby boy! Research the IUD's you have alot of choices!

Sheilka - posted on 12/31/2012

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Well I had my baby a week ago and NOPE DIDNT TIE MY TUBES....I feel good about my decision but I wonder if it's the right one....well....gotta hurry and put that IUD on ASAP!!! ;) thanks to all for your advices....they really helped a lot!

Debby - posted on 12/29/2012

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They generally WON'T tie a woman's tubes until she's 25 or older. You may want to check with your insurance first. I have 3 girls myself and got the tubal after my third child since all three are girls and I play by the three strikes and he's out game! One is fun, two is better but once you hit three and you're outnumbered it's get crazy. My first two were birth control failures and the third was because we were playing with fire. While I was nursing the second I was practically sterile but as soon as she self-weaned I got pregnant. So when we found out the third was also a girl I decided we were done. I was also over 25 so I had no problem getting the procedure done at the time. Then I also got the NovaSure procedure done shortly afterwards due to having heavy bleeding and immense pain. So far banking 5 and a half years later no further babies! I had them young enough to enjoy them and hopefully when the grandbabies come along (better not be before I'm 40!) I'll be young enough to enjoy them too.

Kym - posted on 12/23/2012

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Listen, i get what you're saying about uncertainty with health. Permanent surgeries do affect the rest of your body, it doesn't just stop you from being pregnant. I highly recommend looking into Natural Family Planning if you want to wait on children, or if you really arent sure. Its the most effectice way to hold off on kids plus it's the most healthy for your body. PM me if thou want more details!

Janessa - posted on 12/22/2012

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If you have doubts I wouldn't do anything permanent, especially since you are so young. The IUD is a temporary solution, I would go with that. But ultimately it is up to you and what you want. Give yourself time to figure that out. Pray about it. Good-luck

Jamie - posted on 12/22/2012

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i am 25. i had my tubes tied a year ago after my 3rd daughter was born. now that she is 1 and is walking and talking i cant help but wonder if it was the biggest mistake i could have made?

Kara - posted on 12/21/2012

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If you are unsure then don't do it. To reverse the procedure is very expensive. Condoms are cheaper and can easily be removed if you want a baby. Of course, if your dr. recommends it because getting pregnant again would cause harm to you then your health is important. Otherwise, don't do it. The IUD.... well my sister in law had one and 9 months later a baby came out. I'd go with condoms.

Dimakatso - posted on 12/18/2012

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I think u shud rather go with the IUD just until ur sure.I want another baby now @ 26 even though I thought I wud never want another one.my daughter is 3years old now and in a few months time she will b 4.even after I have another baby I'm sure that will b that time that I will wish for baby no4 but only then will I make the decision on having another one or not.so ur still young.

Sheilka - posted on 12/17/2012

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Thanks for all the advice....I really appreciate the support....I asked my husband and he's not even sure himself if he wants anymore kids...at least we are sure we don't want anymore for the time being....but I just don't want to go thru the hassle of having the IUD and then getting surgery after a few years of I decide I don't want anymore....but then again...what if I do want to? This is sooooooo confusing!!!! Let's see what I decide...c-sec is scheduled for the 27th so I got only 9 more days to think it thru....again...thanks everyone! You guys were really helpful! ;)

Ashley - posted on 12/17/2012

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since you dont know if you will want more kids or not, then you should go with the iud. it can always be removed. if you tie your tubes, it costs a lot of money to undo. personally, i would never tell anyone to get an iud, cuz i had one and it was all great till it was time to come out. i know alot of people who had alot of problems with it. you should look into it and other options of long term birth control before you decide for sure. but i would definatly say not to get your tubes tied, since your not sure if you want more kids or not. good luck. and congrats!

Michaela (kayla) - posted on 12/17/2012

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If you have your tubes tied yes you might regret it but with you saying about your condition you also have to think of your wellbeing and keeping yourself safe and healthy and it can always be reversed if you decide to have more children x

Heidi - posted on 12/16/2012

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You never know where life is going to take you! So I suggest that you get the IUD. I was 22 when I had my second child when I thought that tying my tubes would be the smart thing because I didn't want any more kids at the time. But my doctors refused because I was young. That's when he told me about the IUD. So I got it and it really was the best way to go. A few years after my second child my marriage ended. When my youngest was 5 1/2 I meet the most amazing man and we decided to have one more baby, andi couldn't be happier. I was 29 when I had my third baby and I did get my tubes tide after him but I had grown up some and really for sure knew I wasn't going to want any more kids.

I'm not saying that this will happen to but I am saying that you never truelly know where life will take you and you are still young. So unless you have major health problems when you are pregnant then I say go with the IUD. You can always take out the IUD if you decide to have more kids. With no major pain or surgery. If you get your tubes tied its surgery and if later you want more kids, it would be surgery and costly to get them untied.

Hope this helps!

Elizabeth - posted on 12/16/2012

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If you are not sure that you don't want more kids then dont't tie your tubes. I had the IUD put in that way if I decide to have more chldren I can (i have had 4 3 girls and my son ho died at 9 months old) I really want to have a boy but I know that now is not the time. I had 3 children before i turned 22 and the last one when i was 25. They have an IUD that is good fro 10 years callled the paragaurd, which is good for 10 years. I had this put in last year and it seems to be working. I dont have much luck with birth control and that one is working very good.

Chris - posted on 12/16/2012

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Just remember, having your tubes "tied" does not always mean "tied". When I had mine done "tied" meant cauterized and an inch of tube cut out. Reversal surgery is costly, usually not covered by insurance and not always successfull. It depends on the procedure that was used to "tie" the tubes. My first husband is dead and my second husband wanted a child. I had mine reversed ($25,000 procedure) and one side was successful but the other was partially blocked. That means I was at risk for a tubal pregnancy. I successfully conceived but only after monthly injections to make both ovaries ovulate each month. I had to have an ultrasound two weeks after the first missed period and positive pregnancy test to be sure it was not a tubal pregnancy. Was it worth it? Absolutely, but I am just giving you more possible scenarios to keep in mind when you make your decision.

Leanne - posted on 12/13/2012

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IUD definitely, I had my son farely young got the IUD in and now I know im ready now to start thinking about more kids 7 years later so glad I didn't do anything permanent

Daniela - posted on 12/13/2012

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I have an IUD and I feel very good I have it for about 6 years now,if you like more info on the type let me know ,I think that the tube is not a very good idea since you are very young,good luck with your decision

Toni - posted on 12/12/2012

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I am currently 21 and considering getting my tubes tied.

I had a fairly easy pregnancy, and my son is wonderful. I would like to have more kids one day, BUT my post natal depression nearly killed me, and I dont want to go through that again. My husband and I have discussed it and decided it is not worth the risk, and we are quite happy having only one child we can spoil, lol.

Jennifer - posted on 12/12/2012

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Hi ladys, yes this is not something that i have decide that i want from one day to the next. i have 2 years thinking about it and i know what happen to your body if i do but i still want to do it. I had a perfect pregn. and a perfect delivery (3 hours and was done) and my princess is perfect also (we all say that about our kids) so is not that im scare is just i dont want more kids and even having the IUD on i still feel like one day i would get pregnant and i would have a heart atteck lol. everyone is diff and life its to make choices good or bad (hopeing goood) lol

Good luck to US!!!

Sherry - posted on 12/11/2012

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Just make sure you really look into it & see what happens after getting your tubes tied & what changed your body goes threw. I'm 26 & I had my tubes tied two 1/2 years ago after I had my 2nd child!! & I've regretted it ever since. I keep having a lot the things happen to me health wise that never was happening until I got my tubes tied.. I wish I would have really researched it more before I made my decision..

Sheilka - posted on 12/11/2012

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Thank you all for the advice...I really don't want to tie my tubes because I feel im too young still and I might want kids later on like in 5 years from now but it's my condition of having Lupus and going thru such risky pregnancy not only for me but for the baby as well that has me really considering tying my tubes. Also I don't know if I will have the same energy in 5 years to start all over again after having to deal with 2 boys! Lol....

Letty - posted on 12/11/2012

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I'm 20. I have 2 amazing children... But getn my tubes tied is an option as soon as I turn 21.. my doctor obgyn already told me if I want my tubes tired shed do it... But having some thoughts bout it... Were all still young you never know if you want more kids.. yet the operation is reversible just costly..

Jan - posted on 12/10/2012

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i think it would be a mistake to render yourself infertile so young! any thing can happen and you never know.. at 25 there are 9 long years before nature takes away your option to have children if i were yall i wouldn't do it!

Jennifer - posted on 12/10/2012

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Oh Okay, Sorry that your are going thru that.... And yea its hard to think of having another child when the ones with have are all ready big. But good luck to you and hope you feel better and your babies do well also. I would lead you know if i find a doctor that would tie my tubes and if i go thru the process. LOL

Sheilka - posted on 12/09/2012

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Well i forgot to mention that the reason why I'm considering it is because I have SLE(lupus) and its kind of complicated with the pregnancy and my condition....but at the same time...I've had 2 good pregnancies but not sure if Im up to go thru it again after my 2 boys are grown up....

Jennifer - posted on 12/09/2012

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Hi Sheilka, Im Jennifer and i have a 3 year old princess and im 25 and i have a IUD on for about 2 years and havent found a doctor that would tie my tubes at 25, which i realy realy realy would like to do. The reason why i would like to get my tubes tie its because having kids its hard work full time work and i dont see myself being able to do a great job if i have more kids. For you it could be different you could be a great mom to your boys but it takes a lot of work and a lot of time. You should think about it since you already have 2.

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