Sleeping Arrangements

Heather - posted on 07/15/2009 ( 6 moms have responded )




Hey! I would like some opinions. For the first 8 months of her life my daughter has slept in a co-sleeper next to our bed. Now that she's pulling herself up, it's not safe. We've spent two weeks trying to get her to sleep through the night in the crib. She'll take naps during the day and at night but no matter what, if we leave her in the crib, she wakes up at 1:30am, 2:30am, 3:30am, 5:00am, who knows? It's never the same. But she will not go to bed in the crib. I've read that you're supposed to let them cry. Not only does letting my baby cry sound unpleasant, but also being awake for who knows how long every night sounds unpleasant as well.

So, for the past 2 or 3 days we have let her sleep in the bed with us. When we allow her to sleep int he bed with us she does not require an 11pm feeding and she sleeps through the night until around 7am. So, we're positive that the ONLY reason she's waking up in the middle of the night is because she's lonely. We can't fit the crib in our bedroom so now we're considering just letting her share our bed.

What do you think? Good idea or bad idea?


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Christina - posted on 07/15/2009




I've gone through this twice and am now going through it a third time. I have found that all 3 of my children just don't like the crib. Who could blame them. They are confining and uncomfortable. We have them take their naps and start the night in the crib then bring them to bed with us in the middle of the night. Once they where able to go into a toddler bed they slept on their own. Both of my older boys where 11 months old when we got them a big boy bed. So, hang in there. It wont be long before you can do the same.

[deleted account]

I have a 10 month old, and we co-sleep. I've found we both sleep better and longer this way. I'd say if it works for your family, that's great. You can always go back to crib sleeping at night if you need to later. I do think, however, that you should continue to encourage self-soothing and napping in the crib during the day. But all of you getting enough rest at night is important, too.

Sara - posted on 07/15/2009




i also want to add that I read "How to Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems" by Richard Ferber. I think even if you don't use his method, it's still a good book that has a lot of great information about children's sleep habits. I highly recommend it.

Sara - posted on 07/15/2009




Well, I have a friend that did what you are doing and now she's having a hell of a time trying to get her 4 year old to sleep in her own bed. I mean, I think you need to weigh the pros and cons and decide at what point you're going to draw the line in the sand and say that she has to sleep in her own bed, because she can't sleep with you forever! I personally did the sleep training thing and my daughter prefers to sleep in her crib. I think that helping your child learn to self-soothe is important so when they do wake up at night they can get themselves back to sleep. My daughter only cries at night if she needs something, not because she wakes up. But, you have to do what you think is best for your family, and sleep is definitely important. I just think you need to really think through how you're going to get her in her own bed later, because from what I understand the longer you wait the harder it will be. Good Luck!

Amber - posted on 07/15/2009




I thought it was okay to do it when they are very little and then they would grow out of it, but my son got very used to it and is five now and still doesn't want to sleep by himself. My daughter slept in her own bed the first two years and then caught wind that my son was co-sleeping so she started doing it too wanting to sleep with me. It puts a damper on intimacy, now I have a five and a four year old, and there are still many nights where my bedroom is very cramped. It's really a personal decision, just telling you how it worked out for me! Good luck

Natasha - posted on 07/15/2009




This is a very hot topic. Everyone has their own opinion and some are very strong about it.

I don't co-sleep myself, only when he is sick or particularly upset. But that works for me.

I think you should do what is comfortable for you and your bub, and if co-sleeping is what works, than it works. From what I have read, it doesn't hurt the baby in any way and lets face it, if its a way to not have to be woken up at 1, 2, 3, 4am.. who wouldn't do it.

I am a believer in crying it out, but at 3am, I'm not. We share a bedroom so it is so much easier for me to just pick him up and put him in my bed.

What I would do though is try putting her down in the cot at night, make a cd of you and daddy reading a story, and put it on repeat, so she can hear your voices when she wake up. Get a mobile and glue pictures of you and her dad to it, so she can see you when she wakes up.

HOpe that helps.

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