total loss of interest in sex

Sarah - posted on 08/02/2012 ( 7 moms have responded )

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I am 34. I have three children; ages 6, 2, and 16mo. I feel like if i never had sex again I would be fine with that. What is wrong with me?

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Toni - posted on 08/12/2012

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Thank god Im not the only one!
I was starting to think that maybe I needed to see someone.
I very rarely have an interest in sex, and when I do Im am way to self conscious to actually really get into it. It has started getting to the point of having a bad impact on my relationship. I am thinking of trying out some natural remedies.
I have started doing some exercise, as I have heard that helps, and I am going to start taking some natural herbal tablets full of stimulants.
Dont know how to get rid of my self consciousness though.

Brooke - posted on 08/12/2012

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You are not alone, I am feeling the same way! I have a five year old and twin six month old boys. For me, exhaustion plays a big role. I also want a date night or something leading up to sex. This issue has caused a lot of stress recently between my husband and I, but we are working through it.

Batool - posted on 08/12/2012

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Same here, though I am a mother of just one little daughter but I really find no interest in sex. It is just a ritual that hv to be done in order to maintain peace at home. Moreover, I have just started getting bore of being a housewife. I was free social butterfly before my marriage and now I m living a very tough life. So keep your hopes high, hopefully you will get over this feeling with time. Cheers!

Sj - posted on 08/12/2012

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nothing is wrong with you. you're a busy mom of three. i feel likewise as a mother of one. your satisfaction comes from other pleasures like down time, your kids smile, something like that. you're not broken. if anything perhaps you feel complete. i do anyways. you'll want it when you do, if not, thats ok too. you probably need to come to terms accept it and explain that to your other tho.

Navy - posted on 08/09/2012

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Hah. No, there's nothing wrong with you. Personally, I am the same, and I only have one child. At the same time though, I'm around her 24/7. I don't have friends to go out with or family to let her stay with for a few hours or a day while I regroup and relax. We're in the military, stationed away from everyone we know. So it get's tough to find the drive. Which is usually never. It's always been one of our main issues as a couple. In the beginning, before our daughter, we were fine. A little before and certainly after, I've all together stopped being interested. I love my husband to death and hate that this issue, which seems so simple, can cause so much stress between us.

We're laid back people. Understand each other most all of the time. Unless it's sexual related. Then we're on different wave lengths. I only wish I still had a tenth of the drive he does. Holy freaking crap. I feel bad that I can't give him what he needs, what I want myself, even. The desire is gone. Utterly, completely, gone. It's down to once a month, maybe once every other month just about. So no, you're not alone, and there is nothing wrong with you. I've already been to the doctor to see what could be done. Like, seriously, give me Viagra for women already! Lol. But nope, nothing. Oh and did I mention I'm only in my early twenties? Yeah. It's messed up.

I was on a drug called Ambien for the trouble I had sleeping at night. When I took that thing, if I didn't immediately go to sleep, I was up and ready to go. If you know what I mean. I was beyond stimulated. I have no idea why or what made me that way from the drug, but I wish will all my heart that I could have a lifetime supply. Unfortunately, they only prescribe it for a short period of time. Now, I'm not saying I abused the drug in any way. I took it when I was supposed to, but it just happened to be that when I did, I didn't exactly go to bed for sleeping for a bit. Lol.

My only guess was that I have too much going on in my head to really let myself go, so when I would take the Ambien, it would completely relax me. Then I could do whatever I wanted. I didn't feel the pain I usually felt from intercourse (already been checked by a doctor and found to have nothing wrong), and I wasn't concerned at all with if I was going to be able to get pleasure (another problem, but nothing to be done about it). I could just let loose, have fun with my husband, and then fall asleep after. Lol. I miss when I was on it, but oh well. I still have crappy sleeping issues but that comes with the territory of having a child, as well.

I hope one day that female's can get help in the form of a "miracle pill", like our male counter-parts got. Wouldn't that be awesome?

Alisha - posted on 08/03/2012

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Nothing is wrong with you =) you have three kids under 6! It's probably due to exhaustion. I have three kids 6, 4 and 1. Sex is the last thing on my mind!! You can always bring it up to your doctor though and see what he/she says. Are you taking birth control? Any hormone birth control can really affect sex drive! I know my response probably doesn't answer your question but your not alone!! =)

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