Two houses and a baby

Princess - posted on 08/29/2009 ( 1 mom has responded )




In about 4 weeks, I should be having my first child. My boyfriend and I are temporarily living seperately with our parents until our home is ready for move in. I'm afraid my mom is going to make this arrangement a problem. She recently told my boyfriend that he should expect to spend the night to help out with the baby (not a problem, he was just waiting for the invitation out of respect for my parents). My dad does not want him here every night though so he talked to his parents and his mother said I could stay at their house as well, I just have to leave when he goes to work because no one else will be in the house. When he told me this my mom was also with us and she said No, I need to be home so she can "watch me" for the first six weeks...not inside a home but home at her house. She went on to defend her position with the more I move around the more likely I am to hemorrhage. And then she says to me don't make me tell your grandma. I don't agree with this and feel my mother's reasoning is more emotion than fact based. In my lamaze class I was told that it is encouraged that a newborn see a pediatrician within 3 days of being born if the pediatrician isn't present at the time of birth. I have heard from several sources that a newborn should not leave the house earlier than two weeks after birth. I think that we (me and the baby) should definitely stay at one house-my parents house-for that first three days, two weeks...whatever the time actually is, but I know I will need my boyfriend those first six weeks and also think it will be selfish to keep the baby away from his paternal family for 6 weeks. Has anyone experienced this? How did you handle it??


[deleted account]

I haven't experienced this personally, but I will tell you that I wouldn't have been in the mood to be packing up and moving around. I would talk to your boyfriend and you two should decide what's best for your baby. My mom stayed with us for 3 weeks (she lives in another state). One week before the baby was born and two weeks after. We get along really well and she's a nurse so I loved having her here. If you stay with your mom is your boyfriend's family not allowed to come by and help? You can have visitors just make sure no one is sick and everyone washes their hands before handling your little one. As far as taking the baby out of the house...the only place you should take a baby that young is to the doctor. My little girl had to go to the doctor twice right after we brought her home to have her weight checked. If you have to go ask them if they have a special waiting area for newborns (ours does) and if not you could wait in your car. Our doctors office took our baby straight back when we got there to limit her time around people. Our office also schedules newborn appointments for first thing in the morning or right after lunch so there aren't many people in the office.

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