What can i do to be a better step mom? and how do i deal with the ex wife?

Lauren - posted on 04/09/2009 ( 5 moms have responded )

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I have a two year old step daughter and i worry about being a good step mom to her. I grew up without a mom so have really no experience with having kids other than my little cousins. I am also having a hard time with her mother being so mean and cruel to my husband. Any thoughts or suggetions would be great!

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Faith - posted on 04/09/2009

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I also have a step son and one of the best things for you to remember is you are not their mom and The little one and the ex did not ask for you to be in the picture. I know that is harsh but it is true. Be their for that child listen when she wants to talk, and let her know that you are not their to replace anyone or anything. That everyone loves her including dad, As for the Ex, no matter what she says be polite, and be a better person she might be only mean cause she is hurting and afraid to be replaced as a mom. That is all I can think to tell you. This may sound mean but it is not meant to be.

Shawna - posted on 04/09/2009

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I would just say to be as supportive as you can because although you will grow to feel more motherly to your step daughter you cannot take the place of her real mom. She'll realize this as she grows up and the best thing you can do is be there for her every step of the way, love her as an elder figure in her life and she'll respect you for it. (when I say elder I mean the way you'd treat someone as an authority figure in life, like treating elders with respect and respecting the police, etc) I hope that helps..

Amanda - posted on 04/09/2009

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i can only say just be there for her listen to her and just have fun but also know when you need to be mom and disapline she needs a friend a mom and everything in between. as far as the ex- wife just let her know that yo are not trying to repalce her but you are also her step mom. and just keep it simple you don't have to be friends with her. i have a 12 year old girl who calls me mom cause she don't have her mom.

Amanda - posted on 04/09/2009

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i can only say just be there for her listen to her and just have fun but also know when you need to be mom and disapline she needs a friend a mom and everything in between. as far as the ex- wife just let her know that yo are not trying to repalce her but you are also her step mom. and just keep it simple you don't have to be friends with her. i have a 12 year old girl who calls me mom cause she don't have her mom.

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