what to do with my boyfriend's daughter?

Ells - posted on 03/21/2013 ( 6 moms have responded )

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In the past month my bf's daughter has refused to go to his house in 2 occasions. This is coming at the same time that his ex has started giving him grief because he wont lend her any money (he pays the right amount of maintainance and has the kids every weekend).
My partner's ex has sent nasty texts saying "f**k off" and that he wont see th kids again / u care more about ur gf than ur kids etc...
She is always akward in situations like informing him about school assemblies, kids illnesses and with pick up/drop off.
I never see the kids, but i did at Christmas and we all had a great fun time as friends.
My bf is clearly very upset about his daughter not wanting to go to his and he feels it could be:
- either his ex being spiteful and poison the daughter against him
- his daughter being spoilt
- he's a bad dad (which is clerly not the case, in my opinion)
(i think its the second, i mean my bf treats his kids like a prince and princess and always puts them before anyone else but i dont think a child should be allowed to make decisions such as "not going to see her/his dad" unless doing so could be dangerous)
how would u deal with this situation? have u been through anything similar? any tips?
thanks in advance
by a worried girlfriend
xx

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Michelle - posted on 03/22/2013

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I agree, a 7yo can't make that choice unless there is a VERY good reason like abuse.

My boys are 11.5 and 9 and they don't get to chose the amount of time with each parent.

Ells - posted on 03/22/2013

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exactly i think the same, kids should be kids and sholdnt make these types of decisions

Ells - posted on 03/22/2013

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his daughter is 7 and his son is 6 (but he's fine with him) no they did an amicable split, they never went through courts, and actually he said his ex was encouraging his daughter to go with her dad but she just refused.....

Michelle - posted on 03/21/2013

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Doesn't he have any court orders in place for visitation? If so then he needs to talk to his lawyer. If not then he needs to get a lawyer and get something in writing about his visitation.

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