When to start trying for your 2nd baby???

Rebecca - posted on 05/16/2009 ( 22 moms have responded )

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I have a 25mth old daughter and me and my partner would love another baby but im scared that its not the right time yet cause i dont want my daughter to miss out on anything but also i can see she would benefit from the company of another child. I dont know???

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Sarah - posted on 05/16/2009

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I agonized over the exact same question---- What is the ideal age gap? There are many things to consider. The first is, can you handle having another baby around right now? Two is a notoriously difficult age, but if you were to get pregnant right now your daughter would be almost 3 when the baby is born, which makes a HUGE difference! Also, being that your first child is a girl you are at a slight advantage. Girls by nature are more nurtering and are more likely to want to help you with the new baby. Does your daughter play with baby dolls? Now might be the time to show her how to care for "her baby". This is a good way to prepare her and get her excited to help you take care of her baby brother or sister. Also, if you choose to try for another baby sooner rather than later your children are more likely to be play mates and form a closer bond. My brother and I are 3 years appart and have always been very close. My littlest sister, however, is 6 years younger than me, and it wasn't until I was 19 that we really started to bond. Every child and every family are different however, and what may work well for one might not work as well for another. The choice is up to you and your partner. There are many things to consider, but most important is whether YOU feel ready or not----- Cuz if Mama aint happy, aint nobody happy!

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Sarah - posted on 05/26/2009

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My oldest daughter is 3 1/2 years old and my baby is 3 months. My oldest wants to help me with everything and when my baby girl cries my oldest is right by her side talking to her. I love the fact that they get along so well. It's nice that my oldest is very independent and can do things for herself, so I am not taking care of two babies. I love it and am very happy with their age difference.

Samantha - posted on 05/25/2009

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Ok, im going to talk about the big issues :) Do you want to deal with 2 kids in nappies? Double pram?

Jenna - posted on 05/24/2009

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hi rebecca im 22 now and i have 2 little girl aged 28 months and 17 months i got caught straight away and it was the best thing i have ever done they play together bath together and look after each other they love kissing and hugging each other but there is some fights to im glad i got caught they are currently potty training together aswell i thought there would be jealous but theres not i made sure that my eldest was involved in every thing i did with my youngest from touching and holding her to playing with toys and there good at sharing hopefully they will grow up being close like they are now x x

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I got pregnant with my second when my first was 9 months old, so they are 17 months apart. Its definately challanging the first year, but now they are 3 and 19 months and they have each other to play with. Now with that said, I am currently babysitting for a 2 month old on top of my two. I have figured out that the age gap between my 3 yr old and the baby seem to be a perfect space. B/c she helps me and is very independent. So I think if I ever had a third I would have a 3 yr gap between the second and third.

Glendeen - posted on 05/18/2009

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My daughter is 13 months old and I cant wait for the time to come for me to have abnother baby! My partener and I are getting married in September my daughter will then be almost 18 months old and we want to try right away for another a brother or sister : ) When the time is right you will just know but I dont know if your ever really ready until it happens.

Charlene - posted on 05/18/2009

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i think if you are ready then go for it i think ur little one is a nice age i am 3 months pregnant and my lil boy will be around 17 months when i have this one, we didnt plan no. 2 but i dont regret it my son loves seeing my lil brothers (3, 5, 10 yrs) and when he does he gets board when they have left so i think a new baby will be good for him to play with, i also think when a 2 young children are brought up together they learn thins better like sharing. i wish you and your family good look in whatever decision you make.

User - posted on 05/18/2009

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I would say go for it. I had my second child when my son was 29months and he is great with her, he does not miss out on anything because we still take him out even if its to the park. And now my little boy has a friend for life and there age isnt too far apart. But on the other hand you need to know whats right for you and if you feel your ready for another baby.Its not as bad as you think.

Emma - posted on 05/18/2009

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hi i have a 5 year old boy and a 6 month old boy. we tried for a baby straight away i got pregnant when my youngest was only 7 weeks old i,m now 20 weeks pregnant so dead on to the date their will be 11 months between them : - )

Donna - posted on 05/18/2009

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You and your partner will know when the time is right. I had my son nearly 7 years ago and my husband and i always knew we wanted more children, we decided we would leave it a couple of years. When we came to try again it took a lot longer than we expected, we now have our daughter who is 18 months old. My two love each other to bits. Hope all goes well xx

Lucy - posted on 05/18/2009

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my lil girl was 6 months wen found out i expectin.nw my lil boy jus turned 1 n i pregnant agen.my 2 are so close n they good together.its lovely.quite easy 2.

Rebekah - posted on 05/17/2009

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Hello i av only just joined this grpoup but yr question hit a raw spot with me! I av got 2 girls wgo are 3 and 4 now and they were born on the same day a year apart so they share the same b.day!It was really hard in the begining but now i love it cos they are so close and do everything together!Like every1 else as said this is a decision that only u an yr partner can make,all the best in the future! Becky xx

Rhiannon - posted on 05/17/2009

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I'm due mid September and my first will be 1 on the last day of June. Pretty small gap, but no matter what age gap you end up with, you will be faced with different issues. Have fun trying, either way!

Emilee - posted on 05/16/2009

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Only you and your partner can choose!!! There is 4 years between my first and second and 19 months between the second and third. The boys are the younger and they are the bestest of buds... Annabelle is the oldest and she doesnt want her brothers doing anything she does... there will always be special things that you do with your children.... Dance sports girl/boy scouts

Melissa - posted on 05/16/2009

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My oldest son is 3 and my youngest is 5 months... Nicolai was born about 4 months before my son Jeren turned 3. I think that it is a perfect age for my family, because Jeren loves his brother and likes to give a hand. When Nicolai was born Jeren decided to be potty trained even at night, so I only buy diapers for Nicolai and no pull-ups for Jeren! I think that your daughter would imbrace a new child if you explained to her that you love her very much and make sure that you have time with just her.. as a family,. and just with the baby... Jeren plays baseball Saturday morning and that is his time, plus we take him out to eat once a week as his time.... for Nico we let Jeren go have special time with his grandmother and we play with the baby... As a family we go to the aquarium and to the park... It is good to try to balance it because babies take a lot of care and sometimes you push the older one away... make sure that they get special time and your daughter will love the baby! Good luck with any choice that you make!

Michelle - posted on 05/16/2009

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My daughter is 6 months old and im ready for another baby already but i know it not he right time and i want to give my baby all the attention she needs in this early stages of life, me and my hubby have both agreed that when my daughter is 2 we will try for another baby, there was a simalar age gap between me and my brother and we had a fantastic bond as children and still do now, id say he is one of my best friends and thats the kind of relationship id like my children to have but only you know if its the right time now.

Gemma - posted on 05/16/2009

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My son is 15 months old at the moment {born February 2008}, my husband and I are going to try for another baby at the beginning of next year, so if I fall straight away he will be nearly 3 by the time the baby is born. I think that is a nice age to have a new brother or sister. Good Luck

Lindsay - posted on 05/16/2009

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I agree with everyone else. It's totally up to you two! I think it's hard to pick a "right" time and feel that I was lucky that my second came unplanned. My kids are 18 months apart and for our family, I wouldn't have it any other way. It's busy but everything has a way of working out. Good luck to you and you family and whatever you all decide will be right!

Allison - posted on 05/16/2009

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it's exactly like the others have said, it's up to the two of you when you feel ready to add number two to the mix. I just had my 2nd two weeks ago and my oldest is 14 months old. We weren't trying for number two when we found out I was pregnant. I'm not going to lie it's a lot of work keeping up with both of there demands and making sure my oldest has his special time with just him and mommy, But now that I have both of them I wouldn't give either of them up for anything, A big thing that helps is my husband is really supportive and always willing to help when he's not at work that makes all the difference in the world.

Allison - posted on 05/16/2009

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it's exactly like the others have said, it's up to the two of you when you feel ready to add number two to the mix. I just had my 2nd two weeks ago and my oldest is 14 months old. We weren't trying for number two when we found out I was pregnant. I'm not going to lie it's a lot of work keeping up with both of there demands and making sure my oldest has his special time with just him and mommy, But now that I have both of them I wouldn't give either of them up for anything, A big thing that helps is my husband is really supportive and always willing to help when he's not at work that makes all the difference in the world.

April - posted on 05/16/2009

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The decision is up to the two of you and you two only. My daughter is 2 1/2 years old and she will be three when her sibling is born as I am due the same month as her birthday. She knows the baby is in mommy's tummy, she plays well wih others and she likes to help so I am very happy that we chose to get pregnant when we did. Good Luck!

Shana - posted on 05/16/2009

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Only you and your partner know if you are ready for number two. Don't worry about your daughter, it's a choice that you have to make irregaurdless of her. What is it that she will miss out on being around 3 when a sibling is born? If you can handle being pregnant with her and then having a newborn around, you should try if you are ready. My daughter will be just under 2 when her sibling is born.

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