Why We Should Wait to Have Sex

Kristina - posted on 08/28/2009 ( 4 moms have responded )

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God has been pressing this message on my heart. This is something that I have gone through personally, and I finally understand why God wants us to wait to have sex. He wants us to wait so that we have a can have a chance at knowing true friendship, true romance, true understanding of one another, true devotion, true loyalty, true compassion, and true love. He does not want us to inherit the pain and destruction that sex before marriage causes. When we get involved with someone God wants us to go through certain staged so we can find out the true meaning of love, He doesn’t want us to jump into a relationship and then jump right into sex because it is hard to go backwards through these stages. Its hard to retrace your steps, love was not supposed to happen that way and we wonder why our relationships don’t work out and why we get our heart broken every other weekend but we let it happen to ourselves. We let this damaging pattern destroy our lives.
One day me and my fiancé were visiting another church and this man walked up to us and said to him “stop defiling her bed” and then looked at me and said “stop defiling his bed” he said this out of not where. I was shocked and a little offended at first but that’s when God showed me what I needed to do to get my relationship to the next level with Him. At first my fiancé was frustrated that I made this decision without consulting him but he understands why now. Even though we have been together for four years, we knew about God, and we were good people most of the time, for some reason bad things kept happening with our relationship, our lives at that fact kept happening. This is all too clear to me now but I would sit there and wonder why certain things would happen to us, I would never see ungodly people go though these things, and this is why, I knew god and was still doing ungodly things I was giving Richie a part of me that I was not supposed to let him have yet, doing this I gave the devil a doorway to reek havoc on every area of my life. Sex isn’t bad but its is something that needs to be treated with respect, not everyone you date or don’t date deserves to have that part of you. That is supposed to be for your husband/wife the man/ woman that god has placed in your life, the man/woman that will treat that part of you with respect and cherish it. Just letting anyone have that part of you is emotionally robbing your self, hurting yourself, and damaging to your soul, getting that self respect back is so hard. Said by my best friend. Prov 6:32 but whoever commits adultery with a woman lacks heart and understanding; he who does it is destroying his own life. Sex before marriage bring thing into our lives we were never supposed to experience. Sex comes with so much baggage it is not even funny. Emotional Problems: felling guilted into having sex or so badly needing affection you think you need to sleep with someone to get the affection you need. Pregnancy: you were never supposed to be in each others lives now you are stuck for at least the next 18 years. Now dealing with a number of issues that comes with parenting; staying together and fighting over everything or being apart and dealing with child support and halftime parents. Possibility of one parent bailing and then having to raise a child on your own, not to mention the effect it will have on your child. Some of you may think about abortion, you cannot even begin to understand the effect that can have on a woman. STD’s: yeah sure most of these STD’s are treatable but what if you do not find out in time and you become sterile and are not able to have children? AIDS and Herpes: this is something that you will deal with for the rest of your lives, something you wont be able to runaway from. What if you find the one for you and they don’t want you because you have these things? Or what if you want children? There is a chance you may not spread this to your baby but are you willing to risk that on your child’s life?
Sex is a gift you are supposed to give to your husband or wife on you wedding night, and when you have sex before marriage look at the effects sex can have on your life. I’m with “the one” and still I only wish we would have waited. I wish we would have took the time to get to know each other so that we would have loved the right way, so that we don’t have to take the hard road backward in out relationship, so that we don’t have to work so hard getting true friendship, true romance, true understanding of one another, true devotion, true loyalty, true compassion, and true love that should have been there form the beginning. Just because you have had sex before doesn’t mean you have to keep doing it. I re-gave myself to the lord, I am refraining from sex until I am married with the man God made for me and it has brought nothing but blessing from God, I am on a new level with God that I have never known before. It is amazingly beautiful. Like my best friend says with a new level you get a new devil. When you achieve a goal like this do not be so blinded that you thing the devil will leave you alone, he will step his game up but you will be aware and have the tools to defeat him. God Bless and thanks for reading. Leave your own testimonies!!!!! I would love to hear them

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Kristina - posted on 08/29/2009

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Quoting Heather:

It's nice to read testimonies from fellow christians. What you wrote was so inspiring. God bless you. I agree with you 100% Sex is a gift that is solely meant for one's spouse. And that's what I'm going to teach my daughter one day and hope she heeds my advice. I regret to say I was not a virgin when I got married. After my mom died, I tried to fill the empty void in my life and it didn't matter with whom I filled it with. All it did was bring me more pain and an STD. I suppose I deserved that.
God has enriched my life with a wonderful husband who is supportive, understanding and nurturing. He's letting me fulfill my dream of staying home and raising our daughter.
Thank you for writing and sharing your story. It was the best thing I've read in a long time.


well thank you for sharing yours as well i got a lil chocked up. thank you and God Bless

Kristina - posted on 08/29/2009

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Quoting codi:

Very encouraging. I'm 21 and have been married since I was 17 (nope wasn't preggo, just in love lol) and we waited until we were married too! thats a hard decision and I imagine it's even harder when you've been physical with that person. You mention you wish you guys would've waited, look at it this way, you would've never gotten this answer if had, and I'm sure if a girl would take the time to look at this, christian or non christian, It'll change her life because you hit the nail on the head! Kudos to you and god bless!


you are so right, and i hope that was the effect it gave. thank you!!!! and God Bless as well 

Heather - posted on 08/29/2009

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It's nice to read testimonies from fellow christians. What you wrote was so inspiring. God bless you. I agree with you 100% Sex is a gift that is solely meant for one's spouse. And that's what I'm going to teach my daughter one day and hope she heeds my advice. I regret to say I was not a virgin when I got married. After my mom died, I tried to fill the empty void in my life and it didn't matter with whom I filled it with. All it did was bring me more pain and an STD. I suppose I deserved that.

God has enriched my life with a wonderful husband who is supportive, understanding and nurturing. He's letting me fulfill my dream of staying home and raising our daughter.

Thank you for writing and sharing your story. It was the best thing I've read in a long time.

Codi - posted on 08/29/2009

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Very encouraging. I'm 21 and have been married since I was 17 (nope wasn't preggo, just in love lol) and we waited until we were married too! thats a hard decision and I imagine it's even harder when you've been physical with that person. You mention you wish you guys would've waited, look at it this way, you would've never gotten this answer if had, and I'm sure if a girl would take the time to look at this, christian or non christian, It'll change her life because you hit the nail on the head! Kudos to you and god bless!

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