Types of Anxiety: What's yours?

Allison - posted on 10/28/2009 ( 26 moms have responded )

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I've never been diagnosed with a specific type of anxiety but i'm 100% sure I suffer from some sort of anxiety disorder.



I feel like this hinders my ability to give my 2 year old the life she deserves. I'm too anxious to drive anywhere by myself, go shopping by myself, let her play outside if i'm the only one looking after her, and I avoid social situations like birthday parties if i'm going without my husband or a close friend. I've always been this way but this is the only time i've ever really wanted to change things...for my daughter's sake.



No one really understands. My husband thinks i'm being lazy and coming up with excuses...but he has no idea what kind of fears grip at my chest and cause my heart to pound. I've tried explaining to him and to others that this is a real condition and I don't choose to react this way to situations.



I've only been on medication once for anxiety/depression. It was Zoloft and it made me extremely tired and didn't help the anxiety at all. I'm afraid this is just who I am and i'll always be afraid and unsure.



I'd love to hear from everyone about their issues with anxiety and how they may have overcome them or at least found ways to deal with them.

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Priscilla - posted on 04/11/2010

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I have a lot of the same symptoms. I never answer my phone. I am terrified to talk to anyone on the phone that we may owe money to. Like mortgage company or others. I want to go out with old friends, but my anxiety skyrockets. I have been diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder. But Docs always put me on anti-depressants. They make the anxiety worse. Are there any meds out there just for anxiety besides Xanax? Had a doc pull me off of that a few years ago cold turkey! That was a horrible 2 weeks following that. My husband also has this disorder, so it's a fight to see who is going to call back whoever has called or answer the door. We are not afraid to go out in public. But large crowds can be unnerving.

Allison - posted on 10/30/2009

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we sound a lot alike haha. I feel the same way about the phone and about going places I've already been. It never makes any sense to me why I panic over things i've done fine before! I hate being home alone all the time but I would prefer staying here over getting out because it's less anxiety. I hate meeting new people too! I want more friends but I really don't like the whole process it takes to make and keep a friend just because it sends me into anxiety overload!! But then again sometimes i'm fine and can meet and talk with people and plan to hang out but the anxiety just returns the next day and I never follow through. People probably think i'm a snob but i'm really just afraid of every darn thing.

[deleted account]

I have been diagnosed with GAD- Generalized Anxiety Disorder, and Major Depression. I have 1 teenager and planning birthdays have been the worst. Since age 1, I've had to have help from family to help plan parties and tell other people. I'm not afraid of people, I'm just afraid of the situation that I have to go into. Judgement by others, where I would have it, me being the hostess, food, etc, inviting parents and their children. If someone was to notice that I didn't have a party for my child every year, they would think that I was mean, or I belonged to some sort of religion where they don't celebrate birthdays. I don't wish this type of anxiety on anyone because it's hard. When I'm invited to get togethers, I sometimes attend, and I sometimes don't. I have lost friends behind this, My Boyfriend has lost his patience with me at one of his family gatherings because I had a panic attack while with him. My teens understands which is good, but it's embarrassing. The sweating, dry mouth, shaking. No one will understand this unless they have this condition. I'm unable to work, and have applied for disibility. Still waiting for an approval. I'm far from lazy. I keep my house clean and if my teen needs something I try my hardest to do it. I cook, but don't have social gatherings like most people these days. I thought that I was the only one going through this nightmare. I am currently on meds-Zoloft which was making it more manageable, but had to increase because it stopped working. I take klonopin as well. Need advice! I forgot to add that I want another child one day, but the thought of all the attention I would receive makes me even more anxious and scared.

Natalie - posted on 10/24/2012

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I'm not alone !!! I have a 6 month old baby girl who is my world. I've been diagnosed with social anxiety and have been on medication for many years. I'm 27 years old. I wish so badly that I could drive the car by myself with her, go to mommy groups, play dates etc. I am in therapy and am doing very well considering the fact but, I'm looking for other moms to talk to who I can relate to. I don't have many friends and my fiance works full time.

Natalie - posted on 08/11/2012

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Wow! I may still feel like I'm going crazy, but at least I see I am not alone!! I have always suffered from bouts of depression, overwhelming anxieties, etc. I was actually medicated from the time I was 15 until I turned 19... I was doing so well. I felt like I had come to terms with what was going on with me, around me. I met my hubs at age 20 and everything was just fine. I made sure I dealt with issues in our relationship, yadda yadda, At age 24, unexpectedly, we realized we were pregnant with our first child. Whoa! SHOCK - I had JUST gotten off birth control to start trying haha. Anyway, to top it off at about 4 months, we found out my hubs was going to be deployed again. I was a "single" Mommy for 15 months approximately 6 months after Zoey was born. It was hard, but - some how - I managed. Now, we have another baby - she's 16 months. I immediately went into postpartum anxiety mode after I had her. Anything and everything I had "taught" myself about "keeping it together" completely went out the door! I was in a constant panic! My poor girls (and husband) -- there's no explaining how you feel or why you're acting certain way -- when you're not even sure why!? When Brooklen, our 2nd little girl, turned 4 months, a very close friend of mine (and - ironically- cousin through marriage) lost her 1 yr old in a freak accident. The whole family was devastated to say the least. I mean, we were JUST at his little birthday party 3 months before! At that point, after going to the hospital to be there for my friend and our family, I lost it. My postpartum/traumatic stress has done a rollercoaster downward spiral ever since then, It's so hard to maintain a level head when I am constantly thinking that some freak accident will happen to one of my girls! It's horrifying... My anger has flared up all to often too recently! I never used to yell, etc ... and now ... at any moment something could make me freak out and get scared or anxious... and I'm done! Spent! I have to take a Xanax just to breath :-( I know I'll get through this, and it's so reassuring to know I am NOT the only one. I am so glad I found this site/forum!

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Delema - posted on 07/03/2014

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Hi, I now know that i am not alone. this thing is a living hell. I am now 29 years old. my problem started about a year ago. i was riding in a car with a lady and she told me that her two kids were killed by her husband nephew with a cuttlass for no reason. i thought of the story so much that i imagine my only love in my life(daughter) being killed. oh i dont want to think about it. i get panic by this thought. sometimes i even feel that I may go crazy and kill my belove daughter, i jus cry most often and i will just assure myself that nothing is going to happen. at one point in time i told myself that if i will go crazy i rather killing myself then my child. I love her so much but i am just too worried. this feeling stop for sometimes, but whenever i hear terrible story i panic again. i am not yet diagnose, but i am a nurse, so I begin reading on anxiety. i told my husband and mom. they pray for me and i felt good talking about it. i took diazapan about two times since my anxiety started, it really help me. i am feeling good now, but i want this to go away totally. i really love my child. And i am glad that other can also share their story here. this give me comfort. the country where i am from, if you tell many people about your worry they look down at you. i just leave it to God in pray, and i sometimes exercise,and told myself that this is not me. I have really being looking for help, i also discuss it with the couserlor at the hospital that work. she also give the courage.

Samantha - posted on 10/23/2013

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This sounds like something I'm goin threw I'm 33 weeks pregnant and I also have a 1yr old and a 3yr old. Lately I've been so anxious its like I'm floating out of my body I don't wanna drive or goto the store or evn get out of bed its really scary lately... I don't feel like myself. And I'm scared I won't again... help?

Rachael - posted on 11/03/2012

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Natalie,



Maybe we can chat sometime. I think we have a bunch of stuff in common.

Stacy - posted on 09/16/2012

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I was diagnosied with anxiety after my 2nd child was born. I felt dizzy and just like I was dying. This has been such a long process because while they were doing initial testing detereming if I had anxiety, a few lesions were discovered through a MRI . I have been taking my Ativan and celexa with no real problems but recently I followed up about the lesions and was diagnosied with MS. Now I have panic attacks all the time. I feel likely having a heart attack. I have developed a fear of dying and my brain keeps telling me I must have some condition

no one has found. I was such a happy mom but now all I think about is if I'm dying. My brain won't shut it off. I have an appointment with my "crazy" doctor as we call it. Hopefully things will change.

Minerva - posted on 08/28/2012

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Hi I don't know if I have an anxiety disorder or not. I am terrified of being alone. Its my biggest fear ever. It gets to the point to were I don't like doing anything by myself. I will make my best friend go, or my boyfriend, my mom, my sister, my grandfather, my daughter, my nephew, or anyone I can convince. If no one can go with me sometimes I just won't go. & I feel like I just can't relax. I feel like Im never prepared for anything. I need to save $ for a just in case situation but then I don't want to stay home so I invent to go out to eat or the mall or to do something. I feel like I always have to be doing something & that theres always something to do. I am 6 months pregnant & i feel like Im never going to be prepared that I have to have everything bought (even though Im having a baby shower) & put away immediately even though I have time. & when I get things done I always feel like its not enough. I constantly want to start things even if the things I'm currently doing aren't done & need my attention. I feel like this isn't normal but I don't know.

Amy - posted on 08/22/2012

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I was diagnosed with anxiety when I was in college (in the mid 90's) but I see how I had it as a kid. The past year or so the depression has seemed stronger than the anxiety. I went back on medication after being off for ten years. Leticia, I worry about being alone too or not having any friends. When in reality I am pretty social and have quite a few close friends I see on a regular basis. I also have a hard time going places and running errands with the kid. I am finally to the point where I can do without getting headaches, sweaty palms, racing thoughts, or on the verge of anger. I have learned to talk to my kids in a cool and calm voice. I was constantly getting through my day with flight or fight responses to everything. I am still a work in progress, but I am doing better.

Rachael - posted on 08/14/2012

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Natalie, I totally feel for you. We should talk sometime. I developed postpartum anxiety after my second birth too.

Leticia - posted on 08/14/2012

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I recently gave birth to my 3rd son and was having anxiety attacks, mainly when we go places. I felt silly cos' we've been to these places alot before i had my panic attack. We wouldn't even reach halfway to our destination and I would start crying for my hubby to turn around. One way I got over that was to just force myself, the first time I made
it somewhere, I cried the whole way over telling myself its gonna get better and kept adding up license plate numbers to distract myself, then finally we were at our destination. The only problem i have now is being alone.

Michelle - posted on 07/25/2012

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Oh where do I start. I have been diagnosed with anxiety and panic disorder, when I was about 19, I am now 33. I had this disorder for longer than I have been diagnosed. I remember having anxiety attacks as young as 10. Everything you explained in your story I can say the same. Now I have a 3 year old son and I am ALWAYS scared of him getting sick, especially vomitting, I have an instant full blown attack when anyone even MENTIONS that their child is sick. Just yesterday I read one of my friends status updates on Facebook that said her daughter is throwing up, well that was enoch to put me into a state of panic ever since...and the kicker is, she lives in Manitoba!!! No where even close to us. I too really want to change for my sons sake, I don't want him to pick up the negative thinking or the anxiety. You are so NOT alone in this. My boyfriend sees this disorder the same way, that I am lazy and that I make excuses and in turn it makes me feel more guilt and anxiety!

Katie - posted on 01/14/2011

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It's nice to find a group of people who can relate to the problems I have.
I suffer from GAD and Hypochondriasis. I have always been an anxious person, stemming both from a very messed up childhood and severe IBS. It was only after my son hit about 6 months old that I realllllly started suffering.
I fear that my husband (who luckily is so supportive and wonderful) will someday start to resent me because of all the things I can't do. Like go anywhere without a bathroom, for example. I am currently on Celexa (10m/day) and I am 13 weeks pregnant with my second. Things got a bit better after I was prescribed the celexa when my son was about 9 months old. I stopped having entire days taken up by panic attacks that made me think I was having a stoke or a heart attack. The pills seem to just take the edge off enough that I can talk myself down when I am on the verge of full blown panic. The fear of being on the meds while pregnant was almost enough to make me stop them, but I can only imagine what a basket case I would be without them.
Good luck to all of you, anxiety can be so debilitating exhausting.

[deleted account]

I still don't have my license. When my husband first put me in the driver's seat I was shaking so bad that I only drove around the parking lot for 5 minutes. It has taken me 3 years (a year of which I was pregnant and didn't feel comfortable learning while pregnant) to get to the point where I'm ready to take the test. I just need to find someplace to practice parallel parking.

I am currently not on medication... and I don't plan on ever going back on it. I've been on so many different kinds, and none of them worked for more than two years.

I hate socializing... I have a hard time giving eye contact. Ironically enough I loved working the registers at my retail job... although that did mean that I avoided the fitting rooms. I like being in rooms of people as long as I don't have to socialize with them, so for instance being at the mall or grocers is great... but I get nervous at any social event. I also have a fear of men... sounds weird I know... my husband is the only man I've never feared. No my father wasn't a horrible abusive man, he just had bi-polar disorder and was hard to predict (which oddly enough went away after my parents divorced).

I found that if I miss a Sunday service at Church my entire week is worse. It really helps me center myself.

I was able to avoid post-partum depression by co-sleeping for the first 3 months. I meditate daily, mainly in the shower. Holding and cuddling with my daughter relieves a lot of stress.

Narelle - posted on 02/09/2010

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hi haven.. no you are definately not f(*&ed up... anxiety does some really weird and horrible things to us..but the fact that others have heard movement is a sign that you are ok.. your anxiety may be bach (unfortunately) but otherwise you are ok.

since my last post i have had my ups and downs.. been off cipralex (aka lexapro) for a while now and find that i am able to cope with things. i have had my eyes checked and got glasses.. my eyesight was one of the things that started off my anxiety.. i woke up one day and things were out of focus.. havent been right since.. but now got glasses i find that i am doing better... i can drive now which i used to love doing.. and able to get hte girls to school.
My anxiety sensations started to become less noticable (though very much still present) when i started reading -panic away and reading the linden method...(both on internet).. they really helped me understand that what i was going through wont hurt me and that i will be fine (ie when the panic attacks hit it was hard to imagine that i would survive)..
give them a go if you can.. good luck.

Havenjones - posted on 02/08/2010

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It really is a living hell isn't it! I've suffered from depression since I was a kid, & started with the anxiety as a teen. Spent almost ten years trying to self medicate(drug use) & being VERY destructive towards myself. I just did not care if I lived or died. Unfortunately I hurt other people in this process and I never intended to do so, & still can't forgive myself for this. When I got pregnant at 25 everything disappeared(I've been clean for a little over 1/2 year by then) I was on top of the world. My fiancee left me two hrs after giving birth but I still was the happiest I've ever been in my whole life. When my daughter turned 1 a switch turned off & I went downhill FAST!!!! I spent the next 1 1/2 years trying every anti-depressant out there. I experienced black outs, fell asleep everywhere I went, until I finally had enough & stopped taking them. Dr.'s determined I was allergic to tricyclic ant-depressants. I take xanax 4x daily, & morphine & dilaudid for a back injury. I just want my life back. My daughter just turned 3 & I want to be there for her. When my anxiety is really bad, I can't leave my house, but I'm afraid to be here at the same time, I honestly have heard people talk about me, call out my name. I have to check my house for people. I honestly believe someone comes in my house,. maybe someone from my past who wants to get "back at me". I can hear someone moving around upstairs, & I know I'm not crazy cause my daughter hears it as well, as well as my mother once. I can't change what caused me to do what I did, but I need my Dr.s & peers to take me seriously that I want to change, but need help doing so. So do you guys think I'm fucked up, or is my anxiety fact based?

Allison - posted on 12/07/2009

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Hey Narelle. Keep us updated on how you do off the lexapro. I hope you get better rather than worse. I find that some days are worse than others and the good days are the ones that I can at least get a few things accomplished. There is this book a friend of mine let me borrow that has really helped if anyone wants to check it out. It's basically a compilation of real stories just like ours with help and insight. It's called "Managing Your Anxiety: Regaining Control When You Feel Stressed Helpless, and Alone" by Chrstopher J. McCullough, PH.D, and Robert Woods Mann. It runs through types of anxiety and situations you can REALLY relate to. It hasn't cured me but it has helped me when things just get too out of control and I get scared.

Narelle - posted on 12/01/2009

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hi all .. sounds like ive been reading about my self here.. i too have very much an issue with anxiety however it only really hit me (really hard) about 11 weeks ago.. currently on lexapro but its not helping me (been 6 weeks) so coming off it..
currently im at the stage that i wont drive anywhere thats more then 5 mins away because of the major tension in my head.. i feel so out of it sometimes.. not good esp when kids are in the car..
but in a way its good to know im not alone in this horrible suffering created anxiety

hope you are all doing as well as can be..

Allison - posted on 11/28/2009

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Hey Krysta! Thanks for sharing. It helps me to hear other's with the same problems. It reminds me i'm not crazy and i'm not alone :) I've heard good things about Effexor but some have issues coming off it while others don't. That's the scary thing about trying different medications. Some work out great while others can do just as you're saying...make ya crazy or more depressed than when you started! Keep us posted and I hope the Effexor does you well :)

Krysta - posted on 11/27/2009

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I fit right in here!! I have the EXACT same problems most of you do. I'm now on medication #4 in my life (Zoloft-hated it!, Lexapro- also hated it!, Pristiq-love it had no problems but my insurance wouldn't cover it, and now Effexor-I just took my first pill so we'll see!) Anyways I have also almost always taken a benzo on top to take the edge of when necessary (lorezapam, diazepam) I have found that the everyday meds don't seem to make a huge difference...just make me NOT cry ALL day! But the benzos are my life saver! I have to be able to pop a couple valium and just chill the f out! I'm glad we can come here! I am having the hardest time finding shrink to prescribe me any med so my OB gave me a script for the Effexor but says she can't do the benzos! I have been FREAKING OUT the last two days and have some suicidal thoughts that i would never act out on but they keep finding they're way in to my head....I don't know anymore! Between already having previous problems with depression and anxiety before pregnancy this PPD is not helping out the situation in my head!

Thank you for listen (reading!)
-Krysta

Rebecca - posted on 10/28/2009

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LOL it's funny you asked that. I am scared to death to check my voice mail, or answer my phone if I don't know who it is.. I sometimes can't even bring myself to call people for the simplest things. I won't pay at the video store b/c we have a late fine. I can't go back into places I used to work b/c Im afraid they will recognize me. Silly stuff. We are recently remodeling my grandmas house to move into and I found out the gas line runs through the heating duct, so now all I can worry about is that we are all going up in a blaze of fire... I worry to talk to people for the fear that I sound stupid... I find that I can't do some of the smallest tasks like getting up early, but I can do big things like cook large meals for 10 people. It's weird how it works. Out of the blue I will get horrifying guilt about something I feel I should have done, like take more pix of my kids or take more video...save more art pieces, said something different to them, been nicer... I have so much weirdness to me to bore you. lol do you ever panic about having to go somewhere you have been a million times or having something to do? Sometimes I just feel safer staying home... and I don't know why cuz I hate it here at my moms.

Allison - posted on 10/28/2009

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Quoting Rebecca:



If I feel depressed, I tend to spend money we dont' have or go out to eat so I have something to look forward to so Im not so depressed. I seem to have no motivation or self discipline. Sometimes it takes everything I have just to face people at church. I have yet to overcome my anxiety but I thought you could use the support to know you are not alone. feel free to contact me anytime. -Rebecca








Thanks Rebecca, it's good to know i'm not alone, although I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy. I know exactly what you mean about spending money on things and food. It gives me something to be happy about and it really does take away the anxiety for a little while. I watch a lot of movies and tv...netflix has become my life heh. It's just easier watching and experiencing other people's lives than living my own. Do you get anxious about picking up the phone and calling someone or writing back to an email? Sometimes I can't even do that!

Rebecca - posted on 10/28/2009

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I am like you and have never really been diagnosed completly. I know I have bad anxiety, some depression, some mild bi polar tendencies and it stinks. I have 3 kids and I feel like I am failing them. I get anxiety over even doing the laundry or being alone. I have been on meds too and they used to help but this last bit of them made things worse. You are not alone. Im sorry your husband feels yo uare lazy. I completly understand just being overwhelmed. My house used to get soooo bad...(im sure it still would be but im living w/ my mom right now. loooong story) I would see the smallest things as a huge obsticle and then it would get so bad it would take hours and lots of help to clean. If I feel depressed, I tend to spend money we dont' have or go out to eat so I have something to look forward to so Im not so depressed. I seem to have no motivation or self discipline. Sometimes it takes everything I have just to face people at church. I have yet to overcome my anxiety but I thought you could use the support to know you are not alone. feel free to contact me anytime. -Rebecca

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