Baby Spacing

Sarah - posted on 03/04/2009 ( 3 moms have responded )

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Hi Everyone!
I'm not expecting yet, but I'm expecting to be expecting. My daughter is 17 months and my husband and I were thinking about trying for our second soon. We were thinking that 2 1/2 years separation would be ideal but wanted some opinions first. Any advice?

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Sarah - posted on 03/04/2009

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Thank you. That is very helpful advice. One last question. Do you think it makes a difference if your first is a girl? Does that make 2.5 year spacing easier? more difficult? or no difference? Some people have told me that little girls are easier because they're usually potty trained by then and more nurturing towards the new baby.

Courtney - posted on 03/04/2009

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This won't be too helpful, but here goes...  I am expecting our 4th.  My oldest 2 are 2yrs. 3 months apart, then 3 years between, then this last gap will be just shy of 2 years.  There are pros and cons to having them closer together.  When the children are close together (less than 3 years apart) then they grow together, help each other, play together, and they are in similar places in their lives (similar stages).  The pros of having them spaced further apart are that you have an older child who understands that the baby's needs come first (they might not like it, but they understand - a 2 yr. old doesn't understand that), secondly, the 2 are NOT in the same stage (you don't have 2 throwing fits at the grocery store).  From my experiences, I like them about 2.5 years apart, but I have friends who love having them only 18 months apart and others who think 4-5 years apart is perfect.  You can never plan your children's personalities and that makes a difference too.  I think you and your husband need to decide what you are up for and just go for it.  Remember that being pregnant is hard and even harder with a toddler.  Keep that in mind and you will be in good shape!  Good luck!

Nicola - posted on 03/04/2009

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i think its best when you think your ready no matter what age your first is,, i have a boy of 81/2 mths & expecting my second in middle to end of may , and was  trying for them to be close togegther., its what ever suits you..

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