Starting from scratch with baby #4

[deleted account] ( 9 moms have responded )

Okay,... so we were trying for over a year with fertility treatment to have baby #4 and we didn't conceive. We decided to stop trying and were quite sad yet so thankful for the 3 beautiful munchkins we already have. We came to acceptance of not having a fourth child. I donated all our beautiful baby stuff away.

2 months later - SURPRISE!!!
And a wonderful surprise it was too. We are just so thrilled and it all happened naturally which is a miracle all in itself.

I can't see myself buying all the brand new items again. Baby stuff is so crazy expensive! I would probably get some gently used things to replace the big stuff and I was hoping to get other peoples thoughts on baby showers:

My family had a big baby shower for me with my first pregnancy which was for the twins but not for the next baby which was perfectly fine as we had everything but now LOL,... we haven't got so much as a onesie or a receiving blanket let alone,... an infant carrier, swing etc etc...

What do you think others would think if I had a shower even though I'm on baby #4. I am a bit fearful because I think people would naturally assume I MUST have everything I need and I would hate to appear greedy and or needy. Perhaps mostly I want to respect the boundaries of etiquette. What do you think?


View replies by

Janelle - posted on 05/03/2011




So have the shower, most people you would invite probably know your struggles and understand what happened. If they have a problem with it, they can deal!

Jessica - posted on 05/02/2011




Have you ever heard of a baby sprinkle??? They allow the older siblings to participate too, and really they are sooo cute!

√v^√v^√♥ - posted on 05/01/2011




Nope, have a shower! Make a list of what you do not need and for heavens sake they should sympathize with you more so seeing as you went through all that, gave up and then got this little miracle of a surprise :) it's a new life CELEBRATE and even if you don't get as much as you hoped, every burp cloth and binky helps right? :)

Theresa - posted on 05/01/2011




Our #3 came along 9 years after #2. We had gotten rid of everything too. Friends had a shower for me. Everyone knew we had gotten rid of everything. I don't think there's anything wrong with having another shower. Congratulations!

Kristi - posted on 05/01/2011




i ould putsometh in there about acceping gently used stuf but i had a big showerfor my 1st whch was a girl then a smal oefor my 2nd which is gonna be boy

Tammy - posted on 04/30/2011




I would have a shower- a baby is a blessing and a shower will help celebrate the miracle of life. Valerie's idea is good. Writing about something 'giving away all our baby boots and enjoying our three Surprise!' Along with the lines of what you would prefer to have given as gifts.

Valerie - posted on 04/29/2011




have a shower... it is never in bad taste to have a baby shower...maybe put something about donating everything and then having this wonderful surprise in the shower invitation...people will get it...all the best

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