My son is bullied should he move schools?

[deleted account] ( 14 moms have responded )

My 9 year old as been bullied for 4 years the school wont even admit its happening. Now my son is becoming angry and violent. Im thinking of taking him to a different school is this a good idea?

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Tanya - posted on 05/05/2010

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Yes and no. For starters, if his academic and social growth is affected I would but in turn you could also be teaching him to runaway from his problems which can backfire on you later on. If the school is not cooperating I suggest you go to the district level and speak with the superintendent or school board. Most school districts have a zero tolerance for bullying of any kind and I would let the school know you plan on speaking with someone high up on the chain, sometimes this will scare them into acting. If it is consistently occurring with one child or group of children trying speaking to their parents directly or file a police report as previously stated in another response. No matter what you do I also suggest placing you child in counselling. After 4 years of being bullied and made fun of I am sure he has poor self--esteem as a result. This will help him realize their is nothing wrong with him but with the bullies. Good luck.

Tanikka - posted on 04/05/2013

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Removing him from his school may not solve bullies are in all schools. There are anti-bullying laws that schools are suppose to follow but they rather do cover up. If schools are found not to be responding to bullying than they could lose funding. If they admit they have a bullying problem they could lose funding. Schools are obligated to protect our children. I'm going through something now with one of my son's being bullied and this has been happening since elementary school. They have placed false information in his student records, they will try and cover up. A lot of times administrators don't respond to bullying because they may be fearful of the bullying child. Think about if a child is bullying and displaying aggressive behavior than most likely the parents will too. Schools rather get rid of the one who's coming forward about the bullying than the bullies.

Racheal - posted on 04/15/2010

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I am having the same problem in my son's school. I have talked to the teacher. It doesn't seem to help. Only make matters worse. I am considering homeschool for next year.

[deleted account]

Wow!! This sounds bad! Have you talked to the other boy's parents? What are they like? (Sounds like there may be a problem in his home.) If it's been 4 years, I might move him! It seems like it is getting to the point that school is not about learning, it's a negative social interaction. Your son's mind is growing and needs positive, nurturing relationships. My son had a similar problem in a monassary school, and when I brought it to the instructors attention she told me "children have to learn to get used to all different kinds of mannerisms in other individuals"!!! WHAT?! NO! I don't think my son has to "get used" to that kind of behavior. I took my son out the next day and never looked back.

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Carolyn - posted on 03/02/2015

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My daughter is a shy kid, and was bullied in 2 grade, I talked to the teacher about it, she told me (they are just kids, it will be ok) I was so upset! I went to the principle! And she took care of it the girls apologized to my daughter, but my daughter still had low self esteem from that! It took about 2yrs for my daughter to get over that, now my son is having some trouble with kids leaving him out of games and tapping him on his back, when he turns around they laugh, and this is the same school! I have talked to the teacher about it, and her response is I haven't seen that I keep an eye out for it! I thought,, Wow what does that mean? She doesn't care, my son is in 4th grade, I talk a lot to my kids about other kids bullying them, I tell them what great human beings they are, and how great they will be when they grow up,to be,kind, caring people, keep telling your son how great he is! Build up his self esteem! If the school is not addressing this with your son, and you see this is damaging your son,,I would change schools!

Laurie - posted on 10/24/2013

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Get involved immediately, call the school. If that does not help find out who the parents are & contact them. Try to teach your child to be a strong enough individual.

Jacqueline - posted on 09/02/2013

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Yes, get him out of there. If the school can't admit that there is a problem, then you have an even bigger problem. A positive learning and social environment is one of the gifts we give our children. Shame on the school for not coming to your rescue, sometimes it takes to long to fight city hall, and your baby is suffering. Bullying can cause life time self esteem issues and it's not worth your child's, childhood if things can't be fixed at the school you are currently attending. I am not one to run from problems but it seems that you have tried to work with the school.. Get your children into a program that fosters learning, and positive social interaction among peers, were bullying is not tolerated on any level.

Tanikka - posted on 04/05/2013

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That's right! Our children deserve to be safe in school. They are their to get an education. If they don't take care of bullying than those who are bullied will think they have to take matter in their own hands. Bullying is not acceptable and should never be tolerated. Many kids become severely depressed because of bullying, the school wants to put it on home life but kids spend most of their time in school unless on breaks. This bullying issue is out of control and something needs to be done now!

Patricia - posted on 05/04/2010

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With the new legislation that is being passed hopefully things will get better. 4 years is a long time. maybe a transfer is best normally I would not say so but 4 years omg how could they ignore this for four years?? I teach my son tolerence for nowadays with the no child left behind act there are a lot of issues and behaviors he has to deal with in his class many of the children in his class have behavior and/or developmental issues but my son is patient and understanding and would NEVER bully these children and I think due to his ability to be understanding of others and thier differences he is not a target to bullying. He is also involved in many activites outside of school with children his age who share his interests. You do not want your child isolated. Find out what he is interested in and make sure he is able to participate in it with children his own age if there is something he likes and is good at it willl build his confidence and make him feel good about himself. I would also make sure he knows to talk to you and you can teach him anger management techniques if you can not then I would suggest seeking professional help. Take advantage of any and all resources made available to you and do not give up. Talk to your pediatrician too he or she may have advice.Good Luck!

Tammy - posted on 11/28/2009

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Im glad you pulled your son out of that school. They failed him and you. As for as that other mother, she is setting her son up for failure and her self for heartache.

[deleted account]

Well i approached the mother once and she just hung the phone up on me the next time i saw her up the school she gave me a mouthful of abuse. I know one of their neighbours and the kid is a pain in the neck always causing the neighbours grief but the mother doesnt see anything wrong with the boy. So i finally decided enough was enough and my son moved schools this week and for the first time in years hes smiling as hes going to school and he has friends again

[deleted account]

Well the school board have no interest i've tried everything i can think of to get the school to do something for 4 years now my son is angry frustrated and getting violent in school. Two other boys have left the school because of the same boy that has bullied my son and they are a lot happier. Now i'm being called up the school regularly because my son is fighting they are making him have anger management classes and they say he is the problem not the bully! I've told them this boy has made my son like this he was such a shy but happy boy before this started

Leslie - posted on 11/13/2009

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Have you contacted the school board? If the school won't do anything than call the police. My daughter was being sexually harassed and the the school wouldn't act until I made it perfectly clear next time I was calling the police and the news stations. The boy was suspended and then placed in an alternative school. The worse thing is they where only 8 years old at the time. My kids' school has a no bully policy and they really do enforce it. I think they just didn't think it was true about my daughter. I had problems wrapping my head around it. Remind the school of the mass killings of Columbine and other schools and colleges. If all else fails sue the school. We shouldn't have to change schools to protect our children.

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