Only wants mommy

[deleted account] ( 11 moms have responded )

Hi Everyone, I'm having trouble with my daughter who is 28 months and only wants me. If my husband gets up early with her she yells and cries (and wakes me up). If she wants something and my husband brings it to her she'll say "Mommy do it". It really hurts his feelings and I never seem to get a break. Any suggestions?

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Samantha - posted on 04/08/2010

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I think every child chooses a favorite (after all if you think back you can probably remember being more of a Mommy's Girl or a Daddy's Girl). With my 2 1/2 year old son everything is Mommy all the time, but I wouldn't trade it for the world. You see he is my second child and my 7 year old daughter always has been Daddy's girl. It was always hard on me when she was little and rarely wanted to cuddle with me or sit in my lap. it was always about her Daddy. Now that my son is around and he all about Mommy it feels good. I love both of my kids with all my heart, but it is nice to have that extra strong bond.

Joni - posted on 04/02/2010

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Hi, I am going threw the same thing with my daughter she is 2 and is all mommy, her daddy works in a coal mine and is only home 14 days outta of the months. When he comes near her or even tries to say hi, she says no daddy no, or she will hit him or just give him a look. I hear it will pass,as they get older and figure that, daddy or mommy is ther only short times of the day to bond. And if your the one with her /him all the time they are only gonna have someting to do with just that person. it is frustrating, cause my husband thinks she dont like her daddy i just say she is just use to mommy being around all the time and dont see much of daddy. What i have to do sometimes to get away when hubby is home and i need to go somewhere,i try to get her to take nap then she wakes up all shes sees is daddy and that they can bond a little while your gone and have some time to yourself without the child. Good luck, i think all if us moms are just at the point we just gotta try to move on and hope the better our children bonds with the other half good luck samantha i with ya all the way on this one:)

Anneliese - posted on 04/02/2010

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Hi Samantha, my youngest is 2 1/2 and is going through this faze at the moment! so I am glad to hear from others that it wont be forever! I find it is mainly during the week when my husband is out the door to work quite early so Charlie only see's him for a short time and then Charlie is in bed when he gets home at night...So when Charlie wakes in the morning and my husband wants to make the most of that time with him and get him up or make his bottle etc Charlie doesn't want anything to do with him and we get the "Mamma do it" and he will even push my husband away if he tries to get near him! At first Richard was offended but then after talking to other friends/mums we realised that it was because Charlie saw so little of him during the week that this was his way of showing Daddy he was unimpressed by his absence!! We find that on the weekend when we are all together he is fine and actually becomes a Daddy's boy! I know it's hard as C wakes at 6am and I would love to not be the "Favourite" so to speak especially as I have a 4yr old as well and like you would love to get a break every now and then...it's hard always being tired! But my only suggestion which is what we do is that on Saturday morning Daddy takes the kid's out for a few hours and they go to the park,get a fluffy etc and have some fun together without me and I go back to bed have a coffee and read and enjoy some well deserved peace and quiet...so when we all come back together we are all much happier and have a great weekend as a family and the kids are happy for daddy to do things for them in fact they quite often ending up wanting him more than me as they want to make the most of the time they have him around YAY....So I hope this helps I think we just have to ride this wave for now and even tho the week can seem long if you know you will have some YOU time on the Sat morning and your daughter has some Daddy time you will all be alot happier!!

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Charlene - posted on 12/22/2013

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Hi everyone. .. I have a 2yr old and only wants mommy, I work monday to friday... and her dad also, but it seems that she doesn't want her dad to hold so much or her 18yr old sister. She wants me to do everything and always hold her. I dont know what to do any more. im not sure if is her stage but she throes a fit for every thing, she will even try to hit you when u tell her not to do some thing, I have tried time out in her crib, seat, I have to talk to her and nothing, plase any advice.

[deleted account]

make her deal with it. we had that problem with our 4 year old when she was a baby and it just about killed me but we made her deal with it when daddy would get up with her so I could rest. it is just separation anxiety and she will have to deal with it off and on for the rest of her life. She may as well know that there are a couple of people in her life that she can truly rely on. mom, and dad.

Sandra - posted on 04/06/2010

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My daughter favored my grandparents, and now that im there more for her, spend time with her even though she didn't really want me there she is attatched to me, and doesn't want no one but mommy, When im at work g-parents watches her.. I walk in and cant sit for 5 mins cuz she is already getting her bag ready and saying mommy I want to go home with you.. maybe when he is home he should find something she likes and play with her.. Or maybe you go to the store and he spend time with her.. She will cry for a bit but after she realizes she can have fun with daddy to she will enjoy you both.. I know its sorta bribing but it helps and its get one on one time.. And in the end it will be good for you getting a break and him spending time with her.. :D

[deleted account]

My daughter is the same way. Although it has gotten a little less extreme...its still there. I think the difference is the amount of time spent with the parent. My husband didnt do a lot when she was a baby but then when she was a year old decided he wanted to help. It was a little too late. I tried to push her to him and let her cry for a little while but when it came to getting sleep. I couldnt go to sleep with her screaming for me so would give in about 30 mins later. If I have another kid, I will definitely force my husband to be more involved from day 1. I know what will happen if not. We reinforce the relationship with my husband now by me leaving. She is ok during the day when I am not around. She loves her daddy but the second she sees me, its over. Daddy daughter time is necessary!

Elizabeth - posted on 03/29/2010

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i feel really bad because it's the other way around with me my daughter only wants her dad. I'd love the inconvenience of being her favorite

[deleted account]

Thanks for the feedback Stephanie and Shari. My husband does work long hours and I work part-time so I definitely spend the most amount of time with her. Shari, it's good to know that it did end for you!

Shari - posted on 03/03/2010

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My son who is 26 mos... has just finally gotten over that stage. Though I contribute his change alot on my husbands change of employment. He used to be a shiftworker at a mill that closed. He now has a daytime job as i do, but 7am - 3 pm, therefore our son sees daddy everynight and is picked up from daycare at least 2 day/wk by him. Not saying for someone to change jobs... that just was our situation.

Stephanie - posted on 03/02/2010

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I have no suggestions, just am glad to hear my son is not the only one who does that. My baby won't let my husband do ANYTHING for him. Everything is "mommy do it". I assumed it is because I am in online school at night and work during the day.

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