The Circle of Moms site will be discontinued on March 1st, 2020. Head to POPSUGAR Family's Facebook page for more community discussions.

Let's Go >>

Does your baby sleep through the night in his/her OWN room?

Patricia - posted on 04/10/2010 ( 19 moms have responded )




I had a bedroom built for my baby daughter when she was born. I think she's slept in her own crib one day and a half since she's been born. Now, anytime I put her to sleep she will wake up the moment she doesn't feel Mommy's touch. Sometimes even for naps. I've tried laying her down and let her cry a little, but I have other children in the house who get really emotional if I let her cry for too long. What can I do???? I need a good nights rest without having my eyelids ripped open and a headbutt Good Morning!


Tiffany - posted on 04/18/2010




My 18 month old has been sleeping in his own room since he was 3 months old. And he sleeps for 10 hours at night at a go. But he's gotten used to it since he was young.

One way is to get someone else/babysitter to put her to sleep in her own room every night.

Or you can try to wean her off you. Get her something to replace you, a teddy bear/blanket. Tell her that teddy will look after her when she's asleep. Leave her in her crib but on the other side of the room. When she fusses, let her fuss for a while, then gently pat her to sleep. Slowly lengthen the time you are away from her. Don't pick her up when she fusses and don't give her milk unless it's her feeding time.

Be very very patient. It can take anything from a week to a month. It's hard when the child is crying but she has to learn nap time means nap time. You can also try soft soothing music to keep her asleep or background white noise like rain.

As for the other kids, keep them in another room so that they don't hear her cry. Explain that baby needs time to sleep. Or just let them go out on playdates during nap times.


View replies by

Danielle - posted on 04/26/2010




We sleep-trained my daughter and trust me, it was far worse on me than on her. But the good news is, it can totally be done and does not take nearly as long as you might think. The first step is to know your baby. Simply put, you need to figure out if you baby needs the gradual method or the cold turkey method. The hardest part of figuring it out is making sure it's what the BABY needs and not you. For my daughter, she needed cold turkey. Every time we went in her room to comfort her, she cried harder when we left. So we finally figured out that if we just didn't go in anymore and just let her cry, she would figure it out and go back to sleep. I probably ended up crying more than she did, so it's important to get your husband/partner/boyfriend/supportive friend on board before hand. They need to be your rock to hold you back when you want to bust down the door and hold your baby! The first night, my daughter cried about 45 minutes. The second night, 30 minutes. The third night, maybe a whimper. Since then, she goes down without a hitch and sleeps ALL night- 12 hours. It was also crucial, yes CRUCIAL, to establish a bedtime routine. Even so much as turning the lights out, nightlight on, and music on in the right order. When they know what's next, they feel safe, secure, and happy. My daughter LOVES her crib and practically dives into it at night but she was a monster before we sleep trained. Trust me, it will make your whole family much, much happier in the end and it will give your baby a great skill for life, just bear through 3 or so rough nights. (Maybe let the older kids have a sleepover at a friend or relative's house!)

Andrea - posted on 04/25/2010




My 18 month old has been sleeping in his own room from when we moved (about 7 months old)
I play an instrumental lullaby cd and put it sort of loud, but not too loud and cuddle with him and talk to him. Usually when he is drinking his milk and then when he is done I let him know that it is bedtime and then kiss him and put him down. When I first did this he cried for about 20 mins but then he got tired and fell asleep and now he still gets upset but knows that I am not getting him out and will cry for about 10 seconds and then plays with his stuff animals
Try the music thing with the stuff animals (only keep about 3 animals in the crib and only in the crib so they don't get bored of playing with them)

Larissa - posted on 04/22/2010




My son has always slept in his own bed but up until about 2 months ago had to fall asleep with me then I put him in his bed and he was fine for the night. I couldnt do the cry it out with him to get him to fall asleep on his own he would make himself throw up within minutes! Then I had to go in and clean everything! I finally just sat next to his crib at first with my hand on his back then just next to it then across the room then outside the door til finally I could sit in the other rrom. It took about 3 weeks maybe 4 for the whole transition but now he goes right to his bed. I also made sure to keep the same routine every night bath, say night night to everyone, blankey, binky, turn on his music puppy, then lay down and while sitting with him I never talked just said night night bed time and once i was across the room i didnt even look at him just sat there. If he stood up I'd go lay him down say bed time and go back to where I was sitting. Some nights the process took 20 mins other it took an hour but it eventually worked :)

Tiffany - posted on 04/22/2010




just do it.
you're jsut going to have to lay her down, take the kids outside to play for a bit, and let her cry. It might take a week or so, but at the end she will sleep on her own.
It will take will power and courage.

Cathy - posted on 04/21/2010




That sounds rough on everyone! We put our son in his own room from the first night home from the hospital, our actual nighttime routine was almost a year of rocking him to sleep with his bottle and a story but now when he's ready for bed he heads for the stairs and starts waving bye-bye. He does have his nights every few weeks where he doesn't want to go to sleep right away so I stand next to his crib, rub his back a bit and once he's asleep I can sneak out. Best of luck to you all, and hope you have a head-butt free morning soon!

Angela - posted on 04/21/2010




Hello Patricia,
Sounds like you've got a tricky little job on your hands. My second is a wonderful sleeper, but my first, was a monster all of my own creation.
Never having been a mummy before, I held this angel in my arms and vowed he would never want for a thing, with regards my attention, so he slept in a crib, by my side until he was 6 months, I fed him myself, but he had a "lazy latch", which meant he wasn't feeding, just requiring comfort.

When we finally tried to get him to take bottles, he fought it all the way. The same can be said of him having to sleep in his own room.

We had to use controlled crying, I hated it, but now I see it was worth it in the end. I was fortunate not to have other children, so I can see your problem, perhaps a serious chat with the kids about the long run?

Now my seven year old son (good lord, 7 years!) sleeps through anything, bombs dropping, the lot!
Good luck to you.

Giselle - posted on 04/21/2010




My 18 month old does not sleep a full night in his room as well, I am at the point I am not sure what I should do to encourage this. You know I used to think it was because we used to co-sleep but he would still wake up when we did co-sleep so I think I might have to just let him cry it out but its really really hard to hear my son cry :-(

Kimberley - posted on 04/19/2010




Kaleb is coming up to 18 months old and he's never slept a full night in his own room so i move him into his own cot when he's fast asleep and then he'll wake up twice in the night when he realises he can't move as much

Penney - posted on 04/18/2010




Maranda has slept in her room since about four months. Once her doctor said she needed to sleep in a crib, we took her out of the bassinet and moved her into her crib, in her own room.

Shoshana (Meddie) - posted on 04/16/2010




My son has slept in his own room since he was a month old. When we first brought him home for the first month he slept in his cradle in our room, and once he reached a month old mark we started putting him in his crib for naps and bedtime and now he's 18 months old and wouldn't want to sleep anywhere else.

[deleted account]

I have been reading everyone's posts and I can only say that I am glad that my little girl has been the best sleeper ever! She was in her own cot since her second night at home, has never needed to sleep in bed with us, we haven't put her in a big bed yet, she is still quite happy in the cot and sleeps all night (11 - 12 hours). Good luck with the moving your daughter out of your bed.

Byra - posted on 04/13/2010




Both of my girls starting sleeping in their own rooms between 5-8 months. Nobody likes to hear a baby cry, but if you are tired you are the parent and need to take action. My 10 year old would still sleep with me if I let her, so waiting until they are ready is not always an option. They will be ready when you prepare them for it. With one of my girls I had to work myself out of the room. So I started by sitting in there quietly but not touching, then I sat outside of her door, but reading to her and so on.... The other children just have to be informed and the noise maker or music will help with their nerves, even for the baby to have it might help relax. It depends on the child. My youngest loves music and dancing so we can't play when it is time for bed or she will get up and dance, but we do play white noise while we are reading and calming down for bed time. Be consistent and calm and don't back down. LOL...They can smell fear!! Talk to them even if they can't talk, they understand more than people give them credit. Do what you feel is right, but I know my days with my baby are better, because I am getting a good nights sleep. Now if I can just get my husband to stop snoring!!

Thamar - posted on 04/11/2010




It sounds like she's not ready to sleep alone yet. My son wants me close as well. He sleeps next to us at night. He seems to be getting the comforting he's needing, and he sleeps great alone for naps. I will gradually transition him to his own bed, and room when he is ready. I don't think it's possible to force the issue without serious resistance from her if she's not ready. Good luck!

[deleted account]

Sorry to say you're going to have to put your foot down with her & probably listen to a bit of crying before she breaks the habit. You can do it gradually by sitting or sleeping in her room with her the first couple of times. Good luck!

Dorothy - posted on 04/11/2010




thankfully my son is a great sleeper. he has slept through the night since he was 3 months old and he started sleeping in his own room when he was 9 months old. he is great that way but makes up for it with temper tantrums and clinginess

Lena - posted on 04/11/2010




You might try letting her cry and invest in sound machines for the other children's rooms. You could explain to them that it will just be for a little while and make them feel involved in the "experiment".

Good luck. Hope you are head butt free soon.

Penny - posted on 04/11/2010




yes my lil boy does he didnt have his own room until we moved house when he was 14mnths old and we have no problems, but ive never let him share a bed only when teethin or ill. so maybe tackle that first put his cot in ur room, and dont allow baby in bed with you, it be hard at first keep lying him back down, then eventually move cot into his room x

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms