How do i get my son outta my bed...and into his??

Tanya - posted on 11/03/2009 ( 14 moms have responded )

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My son Memphis is 1 year old...and he has NEVER i repeat NEVER slept in his own bed? I don't know about you...but ya it is getting crazy!!! He has to be beside his daddy, and this makes none of us have a good sleep because we can't get comfortable!! Any suggestions...oh by the way...freaks out if he goes in a crib!

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Kelsey - posted on 12/10/2009

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OK so I had teh exact same problem and here's what I did. I got a blow up mattress and put it on the floor in my sons room and I laid there with him until he fell asleep. My thought was to get him to sleep on his own in his room. one he was used to that (only like 3 or 4 days) I sat with him on the bed and patted his back until he fell asleep. When he was ready for the next step I brought a chair in his room and put it next to his crib and put him down on the mattress on the floor every time he tried to get away I would just pick him up and put him back in bed and tucked him in without saying anything to him. After he got used to falling asleep himself and sleeping on his own I put him in his crib and sat in the chair with him for about 5min while he cried but I could tell that being there was hindering more then helping so I left him and he honestly cried for maybe 10min and went to sleep! I was soooo glad that I almost cried!! and from that point on it just got easier. now I lay him down and tuck him in and he sleeps until 7 the next morrning!! It seems like quite a process but I felt like he would feel like I was abandoning him if I just all of a sudden ploped him in his crib and let him cry and cry and cry. I think taking it in steps made it much less tramatic for everyone involved

Kristy - posted on 12/01/2009

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I went thru the same thing with my daughter, at 9 months my husband and I decided she needed to sleep in her own bed. so what I did because she hated going in her crib was fill it with toys, my 3 yrd climbed in with her and I sat on the floor in front of her and tlaked to her and let her get used to being in the crib, I started out 5 mins at a time and slowly increased the time and cut back on the toys, eventually she didn't mind being in it, but she still didn't want to sleep in it about a month later I put her in it and left the room, she cried for about 45 min and that was it she fell asleep and has been sleeping in her crib for naps and thru the night since. I can put her to bed awake and she's fine. there are times she doesn't sleep for nap time and I hear her talking and playing, at least she's not crying.

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Thamar - posted on 11/28/2009

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Elizabeth - it sounds like you are a very sensitive and responsive mom. I know it's difficult to not get much sleep. Maybe your daughter is just needing a lot of closeness and comforting and is having a hard time with your leaving. This could be the case if her molars are coming in or any other number of reasons. Maybe try putting her crib right next to your bed (at the same height) so that she can see that you're right there when she wakes up. When she gets used to your being there, she may not need to wake so frequently. Then try moving her bed away from yours later when you think she's ready.

Elizabeth - posted on 11/27/2009

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My daughter is 13 mo and loves to nurse. She will not sleep without it . I lay her down in bed wait for her to fall asleep then I sneak out. I am lucky to get 45 min to an hour. I got 2 hours once. We just recently turned her crib into the todler bed so I could crawl in to nurse her to sleep. That sorta worked but she only slept 35 min. How do you get them to sleep without nursing if they are in a todler bed. She will just get up and cry.In the crib she would just stand and scream. Never laid down. If I am in the bed she is ok.... It's so hard .

Kim - posted on 11/20/2009

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I had that problem with my daughter wanting to sleep in our bed too. Luckily for me she sleeps in a crib at day care so I just did the same thing they did. I now rock her to sleep everynight and then place her in her crib and she barely wakes up at night anymore. It is very nice to have our bed back! Best of luck to everyone who is trying to transition over!

[deleted account]

So I read this post the other night and decided to get my daughter to sleep in her bed...I think it was harder for me!!! I layed on the floor in her room with a pillow and blanket, turned on the night light and said good night. She stood up and stared at me for a little and when she realized that mommy was "sleeping" she layed down and started snoring. She slept from 7:30 that night till 7:00am without waking up. So far it's been 2 nights in a row! I hope it comes easy for everyone else!

Raylene - posted on 11/11/2009

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My son, from day one, he slept in a cradle for 3 months, in our room ( cause we were staying with my parents at the time) then he went into a cot, and still is but he has his own room now and he loves it, he sleeps from 5pm till 6am. I think it definitely helps if they know you are not too far away:)

Thamar - posted on 11/08/2009

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One more thing that seems to be influencing my 1 year old's sleep: all 4 of his molars are coming in. he's happy as can be during the day, but at night he wakes often, needs lots of comforting and does not want to be alone. I can only imagine how uncomfortable this is for him. I'm curious how his sleep will be when he's not in so much discomfort.

Tina - posted on 11/07/2009

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I had the same problems, with two of the four. My now 4 year old never slept one day in his crib, his sister (1) wont stay in it all night either. His transition to sleeping in his regular bed happed organically.. he still does come in though. We used to move him to his bed after he fell asleep. Dont worry my 18 year old does not sleep with me anymore :-). They all go to their own beds eventually so dont worrry

Tanya - posted on 11/07/2009

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THANKS EVERYONE....I WILL BE TRYING THESE HELPFULL SUGGESTIONS TODAY!!!! PHEWW I THOUGHT THAT I WAS THE ONLY ONE WHO DID THIS! THANKS AGAIN LADIES!!! ;)

Brenda - posted on 11/04/2009

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just dealt with this same problem. My son always slept in our bed since he was born and we finally decided it was time for him to sleep in his crib. When we would put him in it he would scream and cry. It took us about 3 weeks having to deal with a little bit of the cry it out method (we only let him cry for 5 minutes). Even after he became ok with sleeping in his crib he would still wake up between 2-5 times every night screaming and crying. He did this about another 3 weeks. The past 4 nights he has slept in his crib ALL NIGHT without waking up! I can't tell you how great it feels! It's going to take A LOT of patience, but in the end it's totally worth it!!

Thamar - posted on 11/04/2009

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That sounds exactly like my son! He also freaked out in the crib and did not want to be alone. So he has always slept with us. We recently put the crib next to our bed like a sidecar and he is getting more comfortable being there. He is sometimes right next to me and sometimes more in the crib. I'm hoping that he gradually gets used to the crib, gradually sleeps longer periods and then eventually we'll move the crib away from our bed. I don't know yet if this will work, we'll see. Good luck!

Ariel - posted on 11/03/2009

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If there is anywhere else that he will sleep, like at naptime, try to use it to help him transition. If he will sleep in the car seat, start moving it into his room or next to the crib while he's asleep in it. He will get more comfortable with the crib as he goes. Or, since he's a year old you could try taking out the crib mattress and putting it on the floor so he can cuddle next to someone there until he dozes off, then you (or his dad) can get up and move to your room. Just make sure the mattress is in a baby safe room. Once he's comfortable on the mattress alone over night you can start leaving the room before he's fully asleep. Just make sure you keep his tucking in brief, a story together, a bottle or cup of milk (or nursing), tucked in, kissed.. then just say goodnight and walk away. If you are anxious about it he will be too, so keep things light and cheerful. Babies are creatures of habit and they don't take well to change, but if you keep it up and give him time he'll come around to it. Good luck!

Nischitha - posted on 11/03/2009

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It was a very similar situation for me.. I have a year old son who never used to sleep in his own bed. But when things went too far and I had to make him sleep in his own bed. I just started a nice sleep routine for him. I told my husband to be out during the process. The sleep routine started sometime before we sleep so that he is asleep by the time we get to bed. I give him a nice bath, slip him into his nightclothes, Give him a bottle of milk and sing him a lullaby. He is also content with a bedtime story:).. It took sometime, he started getting up in the night and wailing to sleep in our bed , I never picked him up but told him firmly and softly that We are near him. Slowly by time, he got used to it. It took me close to a month to do this

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