Breastfeeding disappointment

Amira - posted on 11/01/2011 ( 15 moms have responded )

0

0

1

My baby girl was born on October 5th, easy delivery, no major issues, calm baby. We were discharged from the hospital 24 hrs later and were told that she will not have jaundice. 4 days later, signs of jaundice had started. I was not too worried since she was nursing regularly. I started to worry when she was not having any bowel movements 3 days in a row. I called a specific health line here in quebec was told to keep a close eye but not to worry. I was worried sick and finally had to do some anal stimulation with vaseline to make her go. Another 3 days go by and no stool, this is when we went to the dr. She gave me samples of formula and told me i needed to supplement. I was devastated since my heart was set on breastfeeding especially after my failure to do so with my first. Looking back, my daughter was indeed at the breast all day but apparently was not nursing effectively...wish i had paid closer attention to this and knew better... I am now breastfeeding and supplementing and pumping which is exhausting and so time consuming especially with a 3 year old who needs my attention. I can't help but be depressed about the whole thing wishing i had done things differently...how can i shake this feeling and focus on what's really important?? one day i feel great and the next i hit a low and feel like a failure...husband does not get what i am going through and keeps telling me that formula feeding is fine...any advice?

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Angie - posted on 11/15/2011

9

4

2

If you are really set on breastfeeding, and baby is doing good now, you can do it. It takes about 48-72 hours for your milk supply to catch up with demand. Breastfeed, then pump while your daughter formula feeds. Don't pump for more than 15 minutes, and a double pump that does both sides at the same time is best. But the most important thing is for you to not be stressed out. You need to do what is best for you AND your daughter. The more you stress, the less milk you will produce. Breastfeeding is not meant to be something that is so stressful that it takes away from the enjoyment of your little miracle. You tried, which is more than many moms do. And if she's latching, that's half the battle right there!

Charitty - posted on 12/12/2011

13

1

0

Trust your instincts.
Take a few minutes for yourself. Drink lots of water so much so your urine is a pale, pale yellow. Eat some dessert; you need 500 extra calories just to make milk. IF you can sneak a nap, do so.
In the end, it is just food that babies need to grow.

15 Comments

View replies by

Sharon - posted on 01/19/2012

13

21

0

Try taking Fenugreek... it's an herbal supplement known to increase milk supply.

Angela - posted on 01/04/2012

5

0

2

Oh my God, I experienced the exact same highs and lows you are and the good news is that it will get better. My baby was hospitalized for 10 days and was on antibiotics. Doctors recommended formula feeding to maintain her hydration status (necessary due to some side effects of the ABs). Baby got used to the bottle and stopped breastfeeding. I became so depressed as I had plans to exclusively bf. I tried everything from the wide bottle nipples, different hold techniques, even the breast guards to get her back to breastfeeding. I was pumping, giving formula, and trying to breastfeed this whole time. Needless to say, it was disheartening and exhausting. It took 2 weeks to finally get her back on the breast. It seemed like forever at the time. I still give formula but I breastfeed now and don't pump. My full milk supply never came back but I feel blessed. I get to provide antibodies with my milk and she gets additional vitamins with the formula. Also, I won't have to experience the transition phase of breast to bottle. You will be fine - just hang in there.

Amira - posted on 12/12/2011

0

0

1

Caitlin, i finally found a good resource: the breastfeeding clinic at the jewish hospital. You do need a referral from your doctor, u can print the form from the website. Good luck

Amira - posted on 12/12/2011

0

0

1

Thank you Theresa for your words of encouragement...i am still hanging in there (exclusively breastfeeding now) but her weight gain is slow. Will have to make a decision soon but working with a qualified team of LCs is really helpful howeveryou can't mention the word formula!! I'll keep you posted...

Theresa - posted on 12/12/2011

5

0

1

I understand your frustrations! I began breast feeding 2 hours after birth and she wasn't getting anything! The lactation consultant said that she wasn't latching on properly because it was painful but she was latching on, I know this because she was sucking so hard that I started bleeding and when I would use the pump nothing would come out even after an hour and a half. I began producing colostrum on the 5th and became engorged on the 8th. By then my little Lucy was so used to feeding from the bottle that she didn't know what to do with the breast. My Dr. still doesn't believe me and thinks it's because I was afraid of breast feeding. I cried a lot the first 2 weeks and even tried to breast feed thinking she would just figure it out. Now I'm glad she's bottle feeding because she's 10 weeks and cutting teeth OUCH!! know this dear you are NOT a failure. Your little angel will love you no matter how or what you feed her;)

Stephenie - posted on 12/01/2011

14

23

1

i have the exact same issue... wow! glad to know i'm not alone with this. i honestly don't know the answer still searching.

Charitty - posted on 11/16/2011

13

1

0

Excellent news!!!
My only tidbit of advice....stay hydrated, snack several times a day, and if you catch a bit of a nap....do!
Keep us posted.

Caitlin - posted on 11/16/2011

1,915

5

172

Good thing they caught the tongue tie. That really affects the latch. Good luck to you!

Amira - posted on 11/15/2011

0

0

1

Thank you ladies for your replies. To update you, i finally saw 2 lactation consultants and it appears that my daughter is tongue tied! i can't believe that 3 different doctors saw her in addition to a few nurses and no one caught that!! i have an appointment at a renowned bf clinic at a hospital in a week and will hopefully get it fixed. in the meantime, i am still bfing and cut back on the amount of supplements, my daughter is still gaining weight so i am happy :) hopefully when the procedure is done she will be even more efficient and we will eliminate all supplements. thanks again for the support and helpful comments!

Maggie - posted on 11/10/2011

1

8

0

Same thing happened to me. They called it breastfeeding jaundice. I had to stop breastfeeding completely for 48 hours. I pumped as much as possible but it was hard and my supply dropped off. I have resumed breastfeeding and my supply came back quickly, thank God. I have been supplementing one formula bottle in the evening but that's all. I was in contact with a lactation consultant during this time and she was very helpful. Hang in there. It will get better. But I totally understand the feelings. Good luck.

Caitlin - posted on 11/03/2011

1,915

5

172

It's really quite hard to manage the hormones after birth along with a dissapointment such as that, especailly if you were really into breastfeeding.

As for those help lines (I know you're talking about info-sante most likely - I never liked them much, i'm from quebec too). Don't blame yourself for the "failure" as you call it, my second had a heck of a time nursing and I was at my wits end with nursing her, felt like a huge failure as well. Also, the health care nurses, depending on your area aren't very helpful either, I wish I had more advice about where to go for support, but I really don't have any at the moment besides trying to call la leche league, though i've never attended a meeting, they may be helpful. The CLSC nurse that did my baby's checkup on day 3 was telling me I was nursing wrong (it's my third kid) and that he'd lost too much weight (only 7% of his birthweight and my milk was just starting to come in) and that I should consider formula as well.. Glad I didn't listen to them though, because at 3 weeks, he's gained almost 3 pounds on his birthweight, so I guess my nursing is going fine.

Good luck to you, and if you find a good ressource in Quebec, let me know what it is, i'd love to know!

Amira - posted on 11/03/2011

0

0

1

thank you Rebekah for your words of encouragement...our pediatrician told me the same thing: rule no.1 is to feed the baby and make sure they thrive...i will continue doing both for as long as i can and hope for the best...

Rebekah - posted on 11/02/2011

1,508

5

198

Hugs to you!!! Have you seen a lactation consultant or someone that specializes in breastfeeding? I saw one last week and, even though this is my 3rd child to nurse, she was very helpful.

It sounds to me like you are doing the best for your child. When I was nursing my daughter (now a healthy 2 yr old) I started to feel like my milk supply was dropping, but didn't listen to my instinct. By the time we had our next doctor appointment she had lost 2.5lbs, was anemic, and was in the "failure to thrive" category. So, for me, because I refused to supplement, my daughter had all kinds of problems. There is absolutely nothing wrong with supplementing to help ensure your child's health, so don't feel bad. Hang in there... and keep up the good work!!

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms