Do you have this problem because your husband is a police officer-people stopping by?

Missy - posted on 09/24/2009 ( 8 moms have responded )

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We live in a rural area and I don't know how many times I've had people stopping by to see my husband either because they see the cruiser and need directions, help, to report something, etc or to talk with him about a problem they are having. It's so frustrating and scary sometimes! He doesn't give out his address but we aren't hard to find in a small community. We've had drug dealers out on probation stop by when he's not even here and it's just me and the kids and we're in the yard so I can't hide. A lot of times his cruiser is here but he's not because he's off in his truck somewhere and that's when it seems like everyone stops. Then there are the people he somewhat knows that thinks it's even ok to stop by on his day off to ask for advice on some problem they are having. I can't even count how many times his supper has grown cold trying to be nice but get rid of someone having issues on his day off. I feel like screaming sometimes. He's made the comment he would just once like to go to one of their houses and say could you help me since I know you're an eye dr, electrician, etc on their time off. Why do people think this is ok? (A true emergency doesn't count-only had one of those in 17 years.)

8 Comments

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Korki - posted on 10/13/2012

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Joe blow public is so inconsiderate a lot of the time. We can't go anywhere without people interrupting our time together to talk to him about useless stuff. I tell my LEO to avoid eye contact with them if at all possible. I get upset a the people not really at my husband.

Jennifer - posted on 03/31/2010

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Oh yes and those phone calls from people who get tickets and arrested in the middle of the night. What the heck is he supposed to do from another city entirely. The best is most people will say what a horrible job it is until they need something!

Cindy - posted on 03/23/2010

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We live in a different city than my husband works, but people see the patrol unit and decide to stop by to ask him questions. He's nice about it but it bothers me. We get such little time with him, I would rather they respect that and let him spend that time with his family.

April - posted on 03/14/2010

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Sure and when we lived in a smaller town it was worst. Nothing like drunk person at your door at 2 am to give your kids a scare. We live 5 miles out of town in the county now and that put a stop to most of it. I get less resentful each day of his time away from us. You learn to adapt. God Bless you and I feel your pain.

Missy - posted on 01/26/2010

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Thanks for your posts! It's nice to know I'm not alone! They were very encouraging to me-thanks again.

Jennifer - posted on 01/25/2010

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All the time. My dad was also a policeman and it happened with him, as well. My hubby just got to the point that he would politely tell people he was off-duty and direct them to the P.D. or give them Dispatch's number to locate an on-duty officer. He hated it so much, because like you said, it took up so much of their down time. You might try parking the cruiser in the garage if you have one. It is very annoying. We also live in a small community and cannot go anywhere. The grocery story turns into a 5 hour ordeal because everyone wants to talk or ask questions and advice. I feel for you!

Dina - posted on 10/30/2009

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I feel your pain. In the past, we have had neighbors come to the house in the middle of the night to have my husband intervene in domestic matters. Those are the worst - being woken out of a deep sleep to someone else's turmoil. We've also had people just knock on the door to use the phone, or ask my husband to give them rides - just because his patrol car is in the drive. Obviously, if it were an emergency, we wouldn't mind, but people just don't stop to think that an officer might actually have "down" time.

Melissa - posted on 09/24/2009

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WOW! I know how you feel. Nobody has came out to the house before(and I just am waiting for that to happen) but when we are out shopping people reconize him and ask the 20 questions or ask him to help with a thief, call him off duty on his personal phone(sometimes on his work phone) that they always somehow get from a friend of a friend to report the minor, honestly stupid stuff. Its frustrating when we are in the middle of dinner or having family day or just enjoying a conversaion. But when i talk to him about it he hates it but its "part of the job". My mom who is also married to an officer told me i just have to look past it. Its is going to happen you cant stop it so dont fight it. Where this is true i dont know if it really works like that because like you i still get alittle upset. The worst is when I am at work and he comes to visit me(and i love that Iam so proud of him) the people just flock over him asking him "what ifs..." this one girl is the worst he handles it but he hates it . He just isnt a rude person. But keep your head up, and just know you are not the only one who has to go through this. I hope it gets better for you!!!

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