How do i get my 3yr old to use the potty?

Diana - posted on 02/08/2009 ( 44 moms have responded )

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My daughter is 3yrs old and is terrified of the potty! im running out of ideas.....

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Ashley - posted on 02/18/2009

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Quoting Stacey:



Glad to hear there are others out there like me...my son will be 3 in May and he has spurts of days when he goes..but most days it doesnt happen...





 



 



My son does the same thing, he'll be 3 in March....



 



I recently ran out of diapers and totally forgot about getting more, so I sat him down and talked with him about how we had to use pull ups and that before he went to bed he had to go on potty or i'd be waking him up all the time. He sat on the potty for about 30 minutes saying "no i wanna pee mama" and he pooped and peed! It just happened the once, but he's more willing to try now..sometimes even prefers to wear pull ups to diapers. And I give him stickers after he goes, which he LOVES. He does more on the potty now since the whole 'running out of diapers' talk...

Linda - posted on 02/16/2009

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i looked at the potty tots site but there isnt much that emphasizes potty training...unless iam looking in the wrong place..... like for the games and stuff

Stacey - posted on 02/15/2009

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Glad to hear there are others out there like me...my son will be 3 in May and he has spurts of days when he goes..but most days it doesnt happen...

Jill - posted on 02/14/2009

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Hi Diana,



Don't worry so much about the age and what all of your friends' kids are doing  and what  family  members are saying.  YOU know your child the best and they cannot be forced into potty training if they are not ready.  Check for SIGNS OF READINESS: Are they Physically ready? Are they able to stay dry for at least two hours at a time during the day?  Are they having consisitent bowel movements? Do they know when they have to go? Are they Emotionally ready? Do they want to be a "big kid", do they want to please you?  Do they want to use the potty?  OR are they somehow afraid?  Is there something else going on that may be a stress in their life? Are they cognitively ready? Do they understand what is going on with their body and what is expected of them and how to go potty? (steps of potty training)



ALL of these are important for potty training to be successful.  If your three year old is physically ready and cognitively ready it may be a matter of MOTIVATION.  You have to make the process FUN and make them want to go potty and be a big kid.



I  developed the POTTY TOTS POTTY TRAINING Program with this in mind.  My daughter was very resistant to potty training and was labeled "strong willed".  When she thought the process was FUN and that she was doing it "all by herself" (which appealed to her independent streak) she was motivated and felt good about herself.  It also took the POWER STRUGGLE out of potty training.  It wasn't me telling her what to do.  She was having fun with her little cartoon friends the Potty Tots and doing what they do (learning to go potty- singing and dancing along with the DVD--following the illustrated potty chart and keeping track of her progress with a fun little football game that comes with the kit)



Go to the POTTY TOTS website www.pottytots.com and get helpful info and see the other signs of readiness.  Also let your daughter play games with the Potty Tots online and if she likes them, she may just want to try the program to be just like her new found friends!



If she continues to have problems with going to the bathroom you may wnat to check with your pediatrician.



Feel free to share this info with others...



Good luck!



Jill



 

User - posted on 02/14/2009

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The best investment I made while Potty Training was a Spot Bot to clean up all the accidents.

Liana - posted on 02/14/2009

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Just read your blog Tamara.



Makes sense the break in the interest. I went away for a few days and dad didn't carry on with the potty/toilet. When I tried to carry on when I got back he wasn't interested. Now after 4 months he's showing a little interest again. going to keep it up. We do commando in the mornings  until we have to go out.



It seems though from some of the comments that they eventually get there on their own accord!!!!!! :-)

Liana - posted on 02/14/2009

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Thanks Tamara.



Yesterday, he came and found the potty to pee in. And he pooed and peed on the toilet. Then an hour later was peeing on my books!!!!! LOL



I'm hanging in. It takes a little while for them to get it engrained in their brains I think.................

User - posted on 02/13/2009

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Quoting Liana:



It's nice to know I'm no alone. My son just turned 2 last month. At 1 and ahalf he was saying pee pee for both, but would get him to the toilet and he sit on it. now he tells us when he's done it in his nappy!!!!!! We let him stay naked in thehouse when we have nothing to do and try and get him to pee and poo in that. I end up wiping a lot of pee up......






My husband has next to no patience. It is hard and frustrating. Musty just purservere. Good luck!! :-)





My daughter started showing interest in the potty when she was less than a year old and she would use it when we put her on it -- but she is almost 3 and just started got totally potty trained about 3 weeks ago.  Hang in there.  I have an article about my experience on my blog http://lifeasmotheroffour.blogspot.com/

User - posted on 02/13/2009

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Quoting Liana:



It's nice to know I'm no alone. My son just turned 2 last month. At 1 and ahalf he was saying pee pee for both, but would get him to the toilet and he sit on it. now he tells us when he's done it in his nappy!!!!!! We let him stay naked in thehouse when we have nothing to do and try and get him to pee and poo in that. I end up wiping a lot of pee up......






My husband has next to no patience. It is hard and frustrating. Musty just purservere. Good luck!! :-)





My daughter started showing interest in the potty when she was less than a year old and she would use it when we put her on it -- but she is almost 3 and just started got totally potty trained about 3 weeks ago.  Hang in there.  I have an article about my experience on my blog http://lifeasmotheroffour.blogspot.com/

Yalonda - posted on 02/13/2009

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It's been said many times now, but I'll say it again: it's nice to know that I'm not alone!  Our little guy is turning 3 next month.  He's sporadically used his potty ever since the day we got it which was around his 2nd birthday.  He managed to pee in it for us one day after a nap and he went poop on the potty at his babysitter's.  Other than that, he has no real interest in doing the deeds on a regular basis.  We've put him in underwear, which I bought several pairs of his favorite cartoon characters (Cars, Thomas the Tank).  He'll wear them, but then he'll wet them or get them messy.  We've let him go commando around the house, but ironically one day, he peed right on the box of Pull-Ups we got for him.  I'm also beginning to think that the Pull-Ups are a crutch too, nothing more than toddler diapers.  He's at the stage now where he will disappear to go poop (he'll leave the room and close his bedroom door, hide under the kitchen table if we're eating dinner, etc.).  He definitely shows signs or readiness and we've stressed to him over and over that he needs to tell us when he needs go poo poo or pee pee, but he's not there yet.  Very frustrating indeed.  Don't know what else to do.  Reading some of these posts and suggestions are basically what we've already covered.  Perhaps by working with him again on a weekend when both my husband and I are home and then laying off the potty talk for a while while not stressing out over it may just do the trick.  So many people I know who have older kids tell us that one day, "it just happens" so that's our hope!

Linda - posted on 02/13/2009

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yeah we havent had her in pull ups or diapers since she was a little over 2. and she was great with the potty training wanting to do it and everything..

then she didnt want to and now she is back to telling me again.. so yea kinda crazy she wont wear pull ups at night i tried putting one on her and she crys literally saying they are for babys so i dont do pull ups at night..

Kimberly - posted on 02/12/2009

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I have a 2 year old son and, although he is not fully potty trained, he will go on the potty if I suggest that he goes.  I keep him in underwear all day with maybe an accident here and there.  Are you putting your daughter in diapers or underwear?  I would suggest trying underwear and let her feel what its like to go potty in her pants and explain that big girls go potty when they feel like they have pee in the tummy.  I would also reward her with something small like a sticker or a penny to put  in a piggy bank.  I have also talked to my doctor about this and she suggests not to force the issue. Once you relax about her going potty she will relax and things will "CLICK" into place.  Good Luck!

Linda - posted on 02/12/2009

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ya my daughter will be 4 in april and she is still having accidents. now it is mostly she wil say she has to pee after the pee has came out a bit so her underware gets wet then she tells me..so we are working on that one.. any suggestions??

Jen - posted on 02/12/2009

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I totally agree!!! I hate hearing 'she reallly should be potty trained already' I have even heard 'She should have been potty trained by 18 months!' Ok...I know I think my daughter is a genius (Who doesn't think that about their babies haha) but seriously, 18 months? I am envious of the moms who got kids who did this, but from everything I have read, and from what I am experiencing, this is definately not the norm.....at least we now know that it seems to be normal for 3 yr olds to have minds of their own, and want to decide themselves when its time for them to go!
YAY US!



(and lucky me...I have another one who just turned a yr old, so I get to do this all over again!) 

Ashley - posted on 02/12/2009

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It is WAY nice to see lots of other people with the same problem!! My son will be 3 next month, and won't use the potty for me. I take him to an in-home daycare when I work, and he went potty there 3 times in 1 day. I was so excited thinking MAYBE he'll do better at home!! No luck. Now he kicks and screams and runs like hell when I mention the potty chair. I even had him sitting on it in front of the TV for a looong time reading him stories while he was sluggin down the juice. Nothing. I am really at my wits end!!! It is comforting tho that there are others out there with the same problem!



It really does get annoying too when people keep asking "he's not potty trained yet?"  That definitely does NOT help matters any for the stress level!

Jen - posted on 02/12/2009

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I think I will have to try that. I think pullups are just as much a crutch for me as they are for her haha!!



 

Heather - posted on 02/12/2009

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I'm in the process of no more pull ups. Yesterday he had three accidents, but today seems to be doing much better. If I ask him if he has to go he says no and pees his pants but if i leave him be he will go on his own. I told him pull ups sre just for night night time! HOpefully within the week he'll be a pro!!

User - posted on 02/12/2009

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With our little guy, we threw away the diapers...and never used training pants. He had a few accidents at first but didnt like being wet so he quickly began telling us when he had to potty.

Jen - posted on 02/12/2009

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Thanks for reminding me of all of that. I know I need to let her go at her pace. I agree that its become a power struggle, its hard because I know she can do it thats the most frustrating part I guess!
I suppose she will decide to stop peeing her pants when she is ready...I really hope its before she gets married hahahahaha!!!!!



Thanks again! 

Linda - posted on 02/12/2009

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i went threw that too .. my daughter has pee'd on my furniture.. and i was at the point i was in tears cause i thought it was all my fault adn i blamed myself... but i know there is a couple things i could have done differently . but its there own body and they are in control of it .. so its a control issue. and ever hear of peer pressure. well we are pressureing them.. to do somthing they need time to figure out how to do. my doc told me to put her on a schedule take her after every meal and snack and even if she atleast sits on the potty thats ok give lots of praise.. just dont make it into a power struggle if she refuese then back off of her... its her body an eventually children do learn to potty train.. dont worry iam still doing loads of laundry too it never ends. but iam more patient now.. and she is more willing now so it works..

Jen - posted on 02/12/2009

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Oh My! I have to say THANK GOD I AM NOT ALONE!!! My daughter is almost 3. She does amazing when we are out, never pees her pants and always tells me when she has to go potty....however when we are at home she never tells me and pitches a fit when I say its time to go try saying she doesn't have to and promises she will tell me when she does....but then she doesn't and pees her pants. I have tried getting rid of the pullups....that resulted in a lot of wet clothes and furniture, which I was not happy about! I have tried the sticker thing, I have tried 3 different types of potty chairs...I am out of ideas!!!! I might try that candy idea, however I am not sure I am a fan of encouraging with food, but if it works, I am at this point where I don't even care anymore just get potty trained already!!!



Sorry I am not much help either. It is good to know I am not alone though!!!

Linda - posted on 02/12/2009

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yea its hard when the guys have no patience. well not as much as us moms do....just tell him let you deal with the whole potty training thing. cause you might confuse him if dads starts stepping in an dealing with it differently then you do....i dunno thats my suggestion. :)

Liana - posted on 02/12/2009

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It's nice to know I'm no alone. My son just turned 2 last month. At 1 and ahalf he was saying pee pee for both, but would get him to the toilet and he sit on it. now he tells us when he's done it in his nappy!!!!!! We let him stay naked in thehouse when we have nothing to do and try and get him to pee and poo in that. I end up wiping a lot of pee up......



My husband has next to no patience. It is hard and frustrating. Musty just purservere. Good luck!! :-)

Diana - posted on 02/11/2009

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Oh no not mean at all... I thought about leaving her diaper off and maybe if her pants become wet she will realize thats not a good thing? and then just use the potty...

Linda - posted on 02/10/2009

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also dont even mention about the potty anymore then see what happens.. she might just do it on her own.. do you draw attention when she freaks out ?.. that could be the reason...

Linda - posted on 02/10/2009

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honestly i know this might sounds mean and iam sorry if it does. but its cause she doesnt want to use potty cause she is used to peeing in her diaper.. why go pee if you dont have to right... i wouldnt force her to use the potty but try offering her big girl underware take her to the store to pick some out.. see what happens. tell her its ok to go pee and reasure her theres nothing to b scared about .

Angela - posted on 02/10/2009

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My daughter is the same way...she understands what it all means but she is terrified of actually going on the potty. She has three potty chairs now one in each bathroom and one in the living room. She will sit on it just fine and play with it but she freaks out literally freaks out when she actually has to pee and is sitting on the potty. She screams she is scared and cries and her little heart just pounds out of her chest. She is fine when she pees in her diaper or pull up though...any thoughts?

Linda - posted on 02/10/2009

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i would just back off of her and not mention anything about potty and then just see if she does it on her own/..... the less u get stressed about it the better.

my daughter went threw this stage where seh would not tell me she had to go and wet her pants everytime it was so frusturating i tell you . but now she is telling me more and less wetting... but thing we are havin trouble now is she waits tilll her underware is a bit wet to then go but then she finishes in the toilet. but we are still doing the same ammount of laundry it sucks.. an we never put her back in pull ups. she refuses to wear one at night and every morning she has a wet bed so that part is frusturating but however iam ammuned now lol.

Jennie - posted on 02/10/2009

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My daughter will be 3 in April, and she still isn't trained.  You're not alone!  I haven't pushed the issue much, so partly my fault.  My son wasn't interested when he was younger, then it seemed like just one day he started going and he was trained by 3 (can't remember exactly when it happened).  Anyway, my daughter still doesn't show any interest.  I ask her all the time when she's going to stop going in her diaper and go on the potty.  She says she wants her diaper.  I'm hoping she will just decide one day to start.  We even bought her panties for Christmas, thinking this would encourage her.  So...I'm no help, but want you to know we're in the same boat.  If you get any good tips, let me know.  Good luck!

Becky - posted on 02/09/2009

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Thank you!  My 3 year old daughter is fighting the potty training and all of my friends with similar aged child are fully trained.  I was starting to think I was the only one.  We have tried everything, I am sooo glad I am not alone.  

Diana - posted on 02/09/2009

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She will tell me when her diaper is wet shes really killing me lol...As soon as i say "potty" she acts like someones killing her...why does potty training have to be so hard

Heather - posted on 02/09/2009

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i am also having the same problem with my three year old son. At first he was great, and went on the potty all day long except #2. It seems he is losing progress instead of gaining it... Please someone help us!!!

Diana - posted on 02/09/2009

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yes we have a musical potty at first it was great but now she just doesnt care about it....

Erin - posted on 02/08/2009

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I have a VERY stubborn 3-year-old, and I thought we'd never get her potty trained.  We started with her a few months after her 2nd bday, which was too early for her.  I got the "sticker chart", which worked for about 2 potty trips.  What worked for her was the musical potty, lots of books that we designated her "potty books", and a very small candy treat every time she went.  We did one smarty each time she peed, 3 if she went #2.  You need a lot of patience for potty training, because they usually will do it on their own time.  Keep encouraging her, give her timed trips to the potty (we used 5 minutes of book time), bring the potty to the tv room and have her sit on it while playing, etc.  It worked great for us since the potty would sing when she peed and we'd cheer for her! 

Erin - posted on 02/08/2009

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I have a VERY stubborn 3-year-old, and I thought we'd never get her potty trained.  We started with her a few months after her 2nd bday, which was too early for her.  I got the "sticker chart", which worked for about 2 potty trips.  What worked for her was the musical potty, lots of books that we designated her "potty books", and a very small candy treat every time she went.  We did one smarty each time she peed, 3 if she went #2.  You need a lot of patience for potty training, because they usually will do it on their own time.  Keep encouraging her, give her timed trips to the potty (we used 5 minutes of book time), bring the potty to the tv room and have her sit on it while playing, etc.  It worked great for us since the potty would sing when she peed and we'd cheer for her! 

Erin - posted on 02/08/2009

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I have a VERY stubborn 3-year-old, and I thought we'd never get her potty trained.  We started with her a few months after her 2nd bday, which was too early for her.  I got the "sticker chart", which worked for about 2 potty trips.  What worked for her was the musical potty, lots of books that we designated her "potty books", and a very small candy treat every time she went.  We did one smarty each time she peed, 3 if she went #2.  You need a lot of patience for potty training, because they usually will do it on their own time.  Keep encouraging her, give her timed trips to the potty (we used 5 minutes of book time), bring the potty to the tv room and have her sit on it while playing, etc.  It worked great for us since the potty would sing when she peed and we'd cheer for her! 

Shannon - posted on 02/08/2009

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I have got to say letting my boys talk on the phone the whole time they are on the potty to whoever they want (call someone and ask them to pretend being whoever) really was a bonus! They pooped on the potty like crazy :)

Diana - posted on 02/08/2009

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She is always tagging along when i go,with no luck. I have yet to try the potty chair in the living room...thank you for the advice ill be trying it tomorrow:)

Maria - posted on 02/08/2009

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Hi, have you tried bring the potty chair in the living room( let her watch the tv or give her a book she likes) or taking her to the bathroom with you when go?

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