Does your parenting style differ from your in-laws?

Have you ever had a disagreement with your mother or father in law about how you are raising your children? How should moms handle a situation like this?

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5  Answers

280 0

We all learn first how to be parents from our own parents. As we all get older and have our own children we determine what we replicate and what we do differently. Our parents did the same thing. I used to have major disagreements with my MIL about raising our children until both my husband and I made it clear that we have our own parenting style that we expect her to respect, on important things. If she wants to give them candy, make mudpies in the kitchen floor, or stay up late when theyre over there thats fine...nothing worth arguing about. She's the one dealing with the hyperness, having to clean the messes and their grouchiness in the morning from lack of sleep. Parents and Grandparents just need to have a discussion on what rules are expected to stick and let go of the rest. Also...You GET respect by GIVING respect I say :)

13 26

Yes my parenting style differs from my inlaws. It also differs from my parents too. Although I parent more like my parents. I have had a disagreement with my MIL. My MIL often talks to other family members about what has upset her. I prefer the direct approach. I think you should handle disagreements like a lady. Disagree in such a way that does not ruin the relationship but do stuff that works for you. Don't react instantly as time sometimes gives you a new perspective. Talk with your partner for another perspective and advice but try. Sort it out by yourself or as a couple. Don't make him be piggy in the middle.
At one time I could not ignore what was going on so I said that it's my rules in my house and her rules in her house. That was brilliant. It meant I could overlook stuff I didn't agree with at her house. We could always do everything at our house, but that's not very nice to her.
One thing I do keep in mind is she is the mother of my husband and he's pretty fantastic. She had a part in that so deserves my respect. She's also does lovely things with and for her grandkids. Not always what I would choose to do, but the kids love it.

7 22

your husband should deal with his parents and you need to deal with yours

2 0

Yes, my mother-in-law drives me crazy. I've been married for 15 years and it just got bad recently moreso since she retired from school teaching. She doesn't have those kids to help anymore so she's focusing on mine. I let them go crazy when I got home just because I couldn't stand all her rigid rules and lecturing to me. I love her, but it was madness (our visit to them, they live far away).

0 3

I think I have the worst MIL!!
Everything I do is wrong, and the moment I try and confront her she plays the "I don't know what your talking about" game. I, myself like to tackle issues head on, but as my other half always says:" there's a time and place for every situation."
I think the trick is to know when to act and when to smile and wave!!
When you truly can't take it anymore then ask your spouse to chip in and make them understand that the line was crossed over a few times. It is also a good idea to re-emphasize the boundaries.
One thing we all forget is that the issues we as parents have with our in-laws don't necessarily have anything to do with the children.


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