When is it appropriate to call the police on your children?

Some children are stubborn learners, and despite a parent's best efforts, behavior problems can persist. At what point is it okay to get the police involved in your child's discipline?

40  Answers

7 43

Sometimes tough love is the hardest to dish out. But sadly, it is a necessary evil. I've had to do it... I didn't like it - not one bit - yet I knew that it *had* to be done. I had no other options to protect my other children. My oldest made some poor choices - drugs being among them. I tried to work the many avenues to help her there, but none were taken by her. After extricating myself from an abusive marriage, I knew that my actions with my oldest had to be swift and firm. Especially when her abuse resulted in violent behavior. After an vicious attack on her next youngest sister (18) and this wasn't the first time. I had to ensure that it would be the last.

39
0 3

Thank you for your honesty, I'm dealing with the same verbal abuse and now physical abuse from our 18 year old.

0 5

you have to show the other kids that this will not be tallerated... if they don't like it ( and 18 or older) there is the door.

7 43

Thank you all for your support. I'm still waiting (with baited breath) to hear from my oldest. Apparently, *I* am still the bad guy for not allowing her in the home and not near her siblings (which may seem extreme to some). I can't... I won't. I have to stay my ground. If she is still harboring such resentment towards me, that only can lead me to believe that she doesn't believe that she was in the wrong or that her behavior was/is inappropriate. I can't allow that. She will be 21 in July. I can only hope for the best for her and maybe that someday, she will see and understand the choices I had to make.

0 0

Thank you for this. I can truly relate, it is comforting to know I'm not the only one something like this has happened to.

View More
11 43

I have unfortunately called the police on my son on 2 occasions, neither was easy nor pleasant, but at the time I felt as though I had no other option. Being an active-duty military spouse my household goes from being a dual parent to single parent overnight and at times my son tries to take advantage of that. When this happened he was 8 yo the 1st time and 11 yo the 2nd time.
He wasn't doing anything completely criminal, but I could see if it hadn't been address immediately and harshly it could have led down the wrong path.
The 1st time I called, he and a little "friend" were playing with fire and the 2nd time it happened he wasn't listening to ANYTHING I said and had gotten caught stealing small items more than once.

I, like Jayne, found that both different police departments (one in northern IL and the other in AL) to be friendly, helpful, and wanting (like me) to catch these problems as soon as they happened.
Both times they dispatched an Officer who came over and spoke with my son firmly, explaining what he was doing wrong, why, and how to correct the behavior. And on both occasions they called a week and month later to make sure things were going fine and that their "talks" had assisted me in my time of need.

I had threatened to call police the time before these actions took place (considering they both could turn into criminal charges) and I had to ensure both my children knew I would follow through, even though the decision I made was scarey to make; otherwise, my kids would know they could do whatever they pleased and run over me like a doormat.

For those of you who say it will scar a child for life and to NEVER call the police on your children, I'm sorry, but you're wrong. I pray no one will ever have to call the police on their children, but there are times when law enforcement can ASSIST a parent/s with an on-going problem or one that could become a much bigger problem. We, as taxpayers, pay those Officers salaries and have every right to use them as an available resource. If you call your local police dept, I'm sure they would agree and offer to assist a parent/s in their times of need.

I have 2 great kids, but when you're in a new place and your husband leaves for a year; you, as a parent, sometimes have to make unpleasant decisions. If a child is endangering or seriously threatening physical violence at any time or having a part in any criminal behavior, I would recommend a parent calling the police immediately. And there are times, when a friendly, but firm talk with a police officer does a kid some good and allows them to see how their actions can result in serious consequences. My son now knows that I, as a mother, will do what I say I will do, but that I love him, want nothing but the best for him, and has learned how to redirect his behavior and not get involved with "friends" that are acting stupid.

Remember people, the quote "It takes a village," isn't just a quote, it's the truth! If communities (including police) got more involved and supported/disciplined/loved on all our children more often, we would find a much better, much safer, much more pleasant world to live in! God Bless and I hope you all have a Wonderful day!!

38
2 6

It's very uplifting for me just reading your comments Anna. Sadly I don't live in the US and where I live (in Singapore) calling the police assistance like what you did will cost me money - yes, I have to pay (1) it can be classified as a nuisance or rather unimportant (like it isn't really a crime); (2) I could be charged cos it's my kid that's about to commit a crime. So me being the parent, I have to pay for it.

3 0

Thank you soooo much for this wonderful advice! I will ALWAYS remember this. I am a parent of a 9th grade boy, 6th grade girl, 3rd grade girl, and a 6 1/2 month old!!! I was just thinking about "what I would do" in a certain circumstance with my older ones....tough love....I understand. Your last paragraph really hits home! it's so true. Thank you! :) God bless YOU and your famliy!

0 0

I think calling the police on my sister would have been good at several points in her life. Especially since she started getting pretty reckless. I wish my parents had paid enough attention back then. Thankfully, she's a pretty good person now, but I still doubt some of her decisions and wish she'd grown up a little more responsible.

11 43

Your welcome Michele, I'm known (by my friends) for being honest and truthful about every aspect of my life, especially when it comes to my children. I'm glad it helped you, hopefully you won't ever have to use it!! Take care and best of luck!! Robin, I wouldn't have made some of the mistakes I did as a teen if my parents would have called the police on me when I "needed" my head screwed on straight (which was pretty much between the ages of 13-17, lol). So I understand where you're coming from there.

24 0

You pay their salaries so you can use them as a "resource"? That is the most mis-informed statement we in public safety hear. So if you get a paper cut and do not have a bandaid would you call 911 requesting an ambulance because they are an "avaliable resource". That is system abuse. If your child was found in the pool not breathing is a proper time to call. If someone threw a plastic bag in your yard would you call the police to pick it up since they are "available" to you? If a stranger is trying to break open your door while you and your family are inside and you are afraid for your safety is the proper time to call. In the case of EMS its a fact that many departments are not supported by taxdollars. They are privatly owend and operated. By saying you pay the salaries and therefore have the "right" to use them as a resource you are saying that my husbands life that he puts on the line every shift to keep you and your family safe can be bought. I am amazed that people can even be so selfish and ignorrant to the job that police and other public safety personel do. These officers would take a bullet for you or your child even if you have a negitive opinion on their responsibilites. So thanks to your tax dollars all the years of dedication, hours of training that was not paid, missed dinners, holidays away from his kids (missed his babys first christmas due to a forced shift)missed bedtime stories and kisses, abuse and lack of respect from the general public but remaining nothing but professional and a smile on his face you get to live to see your children grow up, grow old with your husband, experience all life can offer. You live a comfortable life because the hard working, selfless, dedicated police officers will continue to sacrifice in order to give you a sense of security. So instead of abusing the work of an officer use that energy to find the proper resources to help you and your child succeed. There are many systems in place for these types of situations. The emergency system is for life threatning emergencies. These should not be confused with each other. I wish you patience and strength to understand and help your child and I hope you find the right path to your childs future. God Bless.

11 43

Oh Shannon, Oh Shannon, you need to go back and re-read my initial comment, because you are obviously clueless as to whom your speaking. Did you not catch the statement I made that I am an active-duty MILITARY SPOUSE of over 18 years? Obviously not, my husband is also an EMT, Search and Rescue, and Special Forces Operator in the Military, so don't try to pull the nonsense you gave me about not understanding; "So thanks to your tax dollars all the years of dedication, hours of training that was not paid, missed dinners, holidays away from his kids (missed his babys first christmas due to a forced shift)missed bedtime stories and kisses, abuse and lack of respect from the general public but remaining nothing but professional and a smile on his face you get to live to see your children grow up, grow old with your husband, experience all life can offer." My husband has done FAR more training [not paid for] gear [not paid for], and supplies [not paid for], than you can even fathom. And I promise you my husband, my children, and I have 10 times the dedication and have missed far more dinners, holidays away from his children, birthdays, anniversaries, 1st steps, 1 child's birth, bedtime stories, oh lets not forget about not knowing where he is, what's he's doing, or the danger he is in for not "nights" or "days," but MONTHS at a time. You haven't a clue what's it like to be moved 800 miles from everyone and everything you know only to find out 45 days after arriving to your new station, that your spouse is leaving for a term of "not less" than 8 months and "could be" as long as 18 months. You know no one, you can get to Wal-Mart, the local grocery, but other than that you're clueless. I am a resourceful person, but when I ask the local police department what to do when my son was doing what he was doing, THEY OFFERED to assist me, they weren't busy at the time, and were MORE THAN HAPPY to dispatch an officer to speak with my son. I'm not stupid, arrogant, or selfish, but in truth if you do a little research just as you pay my husbands salary, tax dollars pay for police and fire departments, and in certain areas EMS services; although you were correct in saying that the majority of EMS services are privately owned now. I have a lot of respect for police officers who know their job doesn't only include writing tickets, putting themselves in danger, and unfortunately sometimes taking a bullet intended for someone else, but it also includes assisting fellow public servants families when they haven't a clue where to turn; whether that be because they're new to the area or whatnot. Those are the officers I respect, NOT officers who think they are above assisting an active-duty military spouse who honestly needs help on how to quickly redirect a child's behavior that could not only turn dangerous, but also criminal. It's a matter of; do the police want to have a 10 minute talk with a child at the beginning, when he/she is starting to steer off course, OR arrest them when they are so far gone, they can't be redirected without some sort of locked facility. I don't know about you, but I would rather pay that officer for the 10 minute talk than the years of incarceration. Good Day and I pray your husband is the 1st type of officer I spoke about (i.e. one who cares about his community) and not the 2nd who thinks speaking to a child is below his job description to be bothered with (we have enough arrogant people in this world without giving them a badge and a gun)

5 0

I have also called the police on my youngest son. (Several times) Unfortunately, he though the cops are idiots and can never make anything stick on him. Now that he's 18 though he's going to find out differently. It breaks my heart, but he's the one making stupid choices. Do not hesitate to call the police--the earlier the better. Also, check out Calvary Academy in Mulberry, Florida. They performed miracles with our son. Unfortunately he got in the wrong crowd 7 months after he got back home and things went downhill from there. He was invited to go back there, but he's 18, it's optional, and right now he has no desire to straighten up.

2 0

Anna Morgan you make some very valid points and yes there is then the need to reassure your child that you are preparing them for the real world and you love them.

60 0

Any parent who has to call the police to an 8 year old or an 11 year old is a pathetic excuse for a parent. If you can't control your child at that age --unless the child is truly certifiably mentally ill-- you need to learn the basics of parenting skills! And with your military training and service, this is absolutely mind boggling. Did your Drill Instructor rely on the police to control his or her recruits? How do they handle it? Did you learn nothing from the examples you must have witnessed? This is simply amazing!

0 0

My husband is a commander and I am nervous that turning my son in for assaulting a kid at school will affect his career, as it will show up on the blotter and therefore his boss will know. My son has been having a lot of disciplinary problems since he started middle school. I caught him stealing money from my bank account, he skipped school, been in fights with kids and went from a strait A,s student to D&F's. Today I got a call that he pushed a boy into a door and the kid ended up going to the hospital. I'm not sure what else to do, but also don't want to have the army boss involved in our personal problems. What do you think?

0 0

I"m Zanele a mother of 15 years old boy I think your idea of calling Police will also help me as im stucked with naught boy who does not sleep at homedint even write his grade10 June exams.

View More
5 10

I have a younger son (16) who thinks that he shouldn't have any limits or boundaries. He thinks smoking pot is okay and choosing friends who participate in these behaviors seems to be his goal. We have tried the family counseling route and there seems to be something much deeper bothering him (possible adoption issues) and he negates anyone's efforts to encourage proper behaviors. This has forced us to seek out more frequent and intense counseling. He has taken a car twice without permission and doesn't think anything of it. This last time he was caught after curfew (and without permission to be in that vehicle) and given a curfew ticket which forces him into the judicial system. There was illegal paraphernalia involved but not caught in the vehicle. We have sought help from our county juvenile assessment center and will impress upon the judge or magistrate our need to hold him accountable for each and every infraction of all laws. His defiance is disruptive to the household and if we need to call police to keep him accountable, we will. A child's need to be in control of every aspect of their lives should not be detrimental to the family as a whole. When there is a lack of control say in their school work or another area, they will struggle harder to maintain control where they can. Helping them to strike and maintain balance is our goal. I pray for everyone who struggles with a young child or teen who puts them in this position. Be strong!

20
5 10

BTW, he disregarded the curfew set for him again tonight. I called to report him as a "runaway" and had a great conversation with an officer who educated me on what the rules of discipline in our state are. He encouraged me, supported me and helped me maintain a bit of sanity and even a little humor. They would all rather help us early in the process, than have to arrest our children later on. They are not our babysitters but they ARE a source of strength and support.

6 0

WOW! I'd love to know that officer's name:) He deserves a medal at the very least. (Sainthood at best)! Serious Jayne...PM me w/ his name if you'd be so kind.

180 21

You are fortunate. Here a child is allowed to chose where they wish to live a t ike age 13. If they don't want to be at home and the people they are with are okay with having them stay the police will report that your child is safe and would rather stay where they are, instead of bringing them home. This law was a direct overreaction to child abuse in the home. They felt if the child could run away and not have to be returned then the child would be more likely to be safe. unfortunately it has helped more teens defy athority thatn it has helped truly abused children.

33 212

@Heather, in many areas were children can do what ever they want after age 13 you have an option of calling child protective services for help. I know few people who have put their own kids into group home because of their behavior, it did help and police took the problem more seriusly. With my kids I established rules very early in their life, at 4 & 5 they had chores to do every day and once a week we cleaned our house top to bottom wich was family afair. One thing that I also did was to make sure that school new what were our family rules and they had to abaid by them, got phone calls from school lots but in the end it did work.

3 0

Heather, That really pisses me off. Yes, the police should help. That is great. But, what you are saying is true - and a huge problem. Our teens are turning into these disrespectful little monsters BECAUSE we are not free to discipline our children! It's crazy.....and the kids KNOW this! As a parent, I cannot wash my child's mouth out with soap if they say a bad word...I cannot spank them....I have to "put them in time out". Which would work...ONLY for a two year old!! Kids NEED boundaries and discipline! I'm not suggesting we beat our children - just discipline with LOVE. Let them KNOW they're loved at all times, pick your battles wisely, and feel free to discipline as needed. The law should be changed to support the parents efforts....not the disrespectful teens efforts of avoiding this needed discipline!!! Sorry - I had to vent! :)

0 27

My son's misbehavior began when he turned 15 and escalated to the point that I kicked him out of the house when he was 17. He got involved in stealing several different times and spent jail time twice. Fortunately our local police took him under their wings, so to speak, and worked with him. Our judge did the same and tried to give him a break. Unfornutately, he decided to take my car, which he did not have permission, and I reported him to the police. I filled out a police report, which was the hardest thing I've ever done, but it did the trick. My son is now 20 and, once again, is the child that I know from his youth. Hang in there, moms, cuz there ARE good outcomes but sometimes practicing tough love is the best you can do for your teen and the rest of your family.

4 2

That IS GOOD PARENTING!! My girls (now almost 18 and 19) knew RIGHT off the bat of what I would NOT tolerate and steps I would take. Drugs in my house = I WILL CALL police. Come home drunk/stoned on drugs of any kind, I call the police. Go to a party with underage drinking, I will call the police. I have only had to have my bluff called with my youngest. Her most recent escapade was .. SHE LOST A CAR.. I mean "LOST" it. Out with her friends she claims it ran out of gas and now they can't find it. Yes I called the police, she gave the same story to the police in a statement and I KNOW it's going to come back and bite her in the rear. She did not want us to go to the police, it was 3 days of driving around endlessly trying to find it!! I know her story stinks and the police were VERY clear that she would be arrested if they found she lied. She also have friends that apparently feel if they are drinking or getting high it's ok as long as they are around. My girls know my boundaries and I do not relax them for any reason. My youngest now knows I DO NOT BLUFF.

5 10

Update: My son took the car again and disappeared for 24 hours. We reported the car "stolen" and when he returned with the vehicle we had the sheriff come and arrest him. He spent 3 days in detention and is now on "diversion" which is probation with all charges being ERASED upon successful completion. There are just some kids who refuse to learn from a little "thump in the head", sometimes you need to use the whole board upside their thick little brains. He still thinks he can use pot, which will then get him a trip to drug treatment. Oppositional and defiant behavior cannot be ignored. My son plays LaCrosse, umpires baseball for his job and is generally a great, funny kid. POT CHANGES WHO HE IS! Medical marijuana stores and the ease of getting a medical card are clearly to blame for the epidemic level of pot use in our schools. Do not have your heads in the sand when it comes to pot use and how young it begins. It is definitely all the way through our middle school system. It is not an invasion of privacy to give your child a $20 urine test. YOU are responsible for any car accident that happens under the influence of pot or alcohol. We have taken away our son's driving privileges and until he has a totally clean urine test (which he is required to take 3 X's per month) he won't get behind the wheel of a vehicle. YES, it sucks to drive my 16 yr old to all his events. YES, it's inconvenient BUT we have thrown down the gauntlet and we intend to hold our ground. BE THE PARENT!!! Your kid has plenty of friends, he/she doesn't need another friend. It's okay that your kid tells you "I hate you", "Go to hell". They're alive and will eventually thank you, apologize or at least not be dead themselves. Anticipate the worst and hope for the best. No 2 kids are alike and setting boundaries and sticking to them will create a well rounded adult in the long run. I pray for you all.

5 10

5-2013 Update to my original post. We have now moved from "diversion" to actual "probation". For what ever reason, after going back to court and standing in front of the same judge, he is on the cusp of going to a facility if he doesn't begin to "tow the line". We finally discovered a counselor with a specialty for children with possible fetal alcohol and abandonment issues. He seems to be responding well to her and we are meeting with her as a couple to reinforce our parenting. Maybe he's just tired of being in trouble all the time, I'm not sure. But he has all but quit his pot use (numbers are very low and should be 0 in another week) He has earned a little bit of freedom, his cell phone (basic, no internet) and as his system cleans up, he's funny, engaging, social and a pleasure to be around. For parents who are struggling with a defiant, ADHD, troubled child. Stay the course. Stay strong TOGETHER as a couple if you are blessed to be dealing with this together. GET HELP! Get respite care if necessary. The worst thing you can do is wear yourselves out. It does nothing for the process. Keep planning for your family AND for you as a couple. Use all disciplinary methods at your disposal BUT acknowledge all good things that happen with your child. They want to hear something positive too. It took us about 15 months to be able to enjoy and say positive things about and to our son. I pray for ya'll who are living this seemingly never ending nightmare. It CAN get better. Blessings.

0 0

This is ridiculous. That is your SON. He made some mistakes, as do all teenagers that age, but to call the police on him? You know what you signed up for when you decided to have a child. I pity this poor boy. It must be so hard for him having such difficult parents.

0 0

You are pathetic.

5 10

Terry, Until you walk in my shoes, you have no right to judge. He has stolen items from our home and pawned them. He's still getting high and has no intention of trying to quit this worthless habit. WE are still in family counseling trying to help him deal with early childhood issues created by his drug addicted/depressed mother and loser father. We have rewarded and had to take the reward away because of his inability to respond. I resent your insinuation. I signed up for a child with no idea what his later years were going to bring. We are still trying to HELP him but unless he helps himself our efforts will be worthless. I pray you never have to deal with a violent/drug addicted/depressed child who thinks he's worthless and that no matter what you do FOR him he does not want to change the way he sees the world.

3 0

You said your son is adopted? Do you know if his biological parents were into drugs? I have heard addiction is genetic and I personally believe that marijuana smoked by teenagers is a gateway drug, it is a fact that pot does something not very helpful to the teenage brain. You are a wonderful parent and are doing everything you can to help him! I will remember your comments for my sons my oldest is less than a month from 12 and is totally changing already, Middle school is harsh!

5 10

Addendum to my 2012 posts. Son now 19, ended up in a 6week rehab program because he hadn't been sober EVER. Pot ruled his every waking moment. The first time he got to drive from my previous posts was January of 2014 and he hit a parked car and ran. Didn't report it and was found out when turned in by a neighbor who witnessed the accident. His pot use has clearly stunted his decision making ability. He's still defiant and thinks because he is 19 that our house rules don't pertain to him. He is one nasty day away from being driven to a youth shelter. He is an addict and will always be one. He doesn't think he is and thinks he will be able to smoke pot when he is 21, because of course we live in Colorado where the voters helped perpetuate my nightmare and legalized recreational pot. ANY person pointing fingers at parents like us who have done EVERYTHING we could possibly do to love and support a child who doesn't want or respect it need to take a step back and count your blessings. It's mot over and won't be for a few more years. Right now we just want him to finish a high school education and get a job. The natural consequences that will follow all the horrible choices he's made will haunt him for many years to come.

0 0

how did all turn out. Did he stop using pot

View More
15 19

I never would have thought I would be a parent that had to call the police on my own child, but I did and it was the best decision I ever made for him. He is adopted and has always had some anger issues and has been in counseling since the age of 5. The problem is he never acts out to anyone but me, for a long time I thought this was my fault but I have 4 other adopted children and no issues at all. He got angry one night when I told him he couldn't cuss his younger brother and punched me in the face and left. I called the police because I had made the decision he wasn' t coming back to my home without something changing. The officers took it very seriously and photographed my face and put out a bulletin to pick him up when seen. I went looking and found him walking down the highway and called and they showed up lights and sirens blazing and surrounded him and handcuffed him and took him to the station. I didn't see him for an hour and he was a changed boy. We went to court and he was put on probation for a year and that was 3 years ago. We still argue but never has he raised his voice at me or become violent. This experience scared him and hopefully showed him just how bad it could get. My son was 14 by the way and I would do it again in a heartbeat.

18
1 21

Jennifer and Carolyn..... My son also adopted is going down this same road. He hasnt hit me yet but has pushed. His father left in 2011 so now I am a single Mom and he thinks he doesnt have to respect me. Last night I had someone in the house to try and fix an electric plug and he was acting up and I told him he needed to respect me and he accually said NO. His father is a cop so I do not think for him a cop coming would have the same affect on him. I am just beyond knowing what to do.....

2 33

To preface this statement, there was a lot that happened before this arrest to lead up to it, having to do with emotional instability (which led to drug use), to numb her feelings. My Daughter was going on 15 and was caught with resin in a small pipe when stopped by police (after throwing up all over one of them). That was the 2nd, are you so and so and do you have a daughter X phone call...! She was thrown into the juvenile system and we were going to court quite often. I found a site online for struggling teens in S. Carolina and I mortgaged my house (i am a single mom of 3) and sent her there. (by doing this, the charges in my state were suspended). They tried to shove religion down her throat, but she is extremely intelligent and manipulative. The woman called 6 weeks later telling me she was putting her on a plane the next day that she could not handle her. With no $ left I didn't know what to do so I called social services and was told, "the only way we can help you is if you abandon your child". I told them that her father had already done this and i would never abandon her. I meditated all night on the answer and the next day called her probation officer in my state and asked her if my daughter was still in the criminal justice system, would i still have juristiction over her as her mother. She said "of course". I then said, "good, i'd like you to re-arrest my daughter". It was the first time anyone had ever asked this and it was the most difficult decision of my life. With that, she was placed in the system and my state paid for a residential treatment program for one year ($80,000)! It was the best decision of my life as she is now a beautiful 22 year old girl who is drug free and happy.

16
9 44

AMEN! What a great story and it shows your love for your daughter. You saved her from a life that was ghoing down fast. Kidoos to you Pauline!!!

2 33

Thank you Daphne. I didn't tell her what I had done until she was 21 yrs. old and in a really good place emotionally. She got pretty angry at first, but then realized what a hard action that was for me to take and that I did it for her and her brother and sister. She is adult beyond her years in some ways now, and says it is hard to hang around kids her age who only party all the time. I also took the NAMI (National Assoc. for Mental Illness) course which is offered in communities around the country and it helped me a lot in identifying what was illness and what was not. I highly recommend this course.

11 43

I completely agree with Daphne, wow what a powerful story and what an AMAZING Mom you had to be to do that. So glad to hear you had a happy ending! God Bless!

0 1

My goodness Pauline i am so glad to have read your storie.I have a 13 year old daughter who is just so mixed up emotionally.I am a single Mother who is trying to take on the WORLD,eg work and raise not only my 13yo but her 6yo sister.I have had anger issues with the 13yo since she was a 2yo.It broke my heart but i had to put her into foster care about 4years ago,ofcourse resulting to that she had stints with family members which didnt work.THe girls father is of no help as has anger issues himself.I have tried councilling,parenting courses you name it hasnt worked.After being out of my care for several years she had returned until last week i had to put her back into foster care,as she is trying to self harm herself.Gosh dhs & stlukes are trying to place her back home with her sister and myself but they need to give my baby more help!!She so desprate wants to come home and i also want that but in the process is killing us all inside with her anger problems.....Life sucks at times....

0 0

I tried that and the "system" has kept my daughter and put such a wide gap between us I dont know if it can ever be repaired. I am so angry at the "system" here its beyond belief. They will admit she is is an expert manipulator, but refuse to help me. Its like watching a train wreck about to happen and someone is holding me back when I know how to stop it.

2 33

Dear Donna and Christine, don't give up!! It is imperative that you try to remain involved in the process with the "system". If you have probation officers, stay closely connected for if they are truly doing their job, they will help you each step of the way. Donna, i understand fully about having your other child to protect, as i have two younger children that were very affected, but each child learned from their older sisters actions. My kids are now 23 and 20 (twins) and even though my oldest still cycles (she is back in therapy now) as they get older they are much more intelligent and listen to reasoning. Keep your faith and remember, this is their path, their journeys, and although we need to love and nurture them no matter how old they are, they need to experience whatever it is in their lives to learn their own lessons. Good luck! Namaste' Pauline

254 28

I "abandoned" by 14yo in March after juvenile transferred him back from a psychiatric hospital he was court-ordered to for medical assessment/med wash. Juvenile said they had no charges to detain him & I needed to pick him up...why they transferred him back knowing this, I have no clue, but I followed medical professional's recommendation for 24 hour supervision & that it was unsafe for him to be in my home, I didn't pick him up, & was hotlined to Children's Division for abandonment. It was the hardest decision I've ever had to make; he is now in a residential facility after being arrested when CD disregarded all medical advice & put him in "least restrictive environment" ....a foster home. Working with the "system" has been aggravating to say the least, but they have so many resources that I can't get to. Before CD was involved, it was just as aggravating, my insurance kicked him out 3 weeks into a 60 day program...I wish there were easy answers, but it's a tough path no matter which way you go....just trying to find the greater good :)

View More
21 6

Plain and simple when their actions threaten the safety and well-being of themselves, you, your spouse and/or other children in or outside of the household. If they are consorting with criminals or committing criminal acts themselves the police should be brought in when reasoning fails. It might sound harsh but breaking the law is just that and if they don't learn sooner then later their path could take them and those they "love" into dangerous situations

12
9 12

When they are actively breaking the law (drugs/drinking+driving) or if they are a physical danger to you, themselves, or others.

8
185 2

Good question! My husband is law enforcement... I'm going to ask him this question when he gets home.

7
180 21

Did he give you an answer? I am very interested to hear his views. I had a daughter (now 23) who was very willful and disobedient. Her behavior was much the same as some of the other troubled teens that moms are talking about in this thread. Oh, and for the record, having achild who behaves in a completely disruptive and rebellious way is not always the fault of the parent.

6 2

Amen! So many people always blame the parents, but it is simply not always the parents fault. Children have a mind of their own.

180 21

So my daughter proved time and again.

185 2

Yes! He is for it when they become reckless and a danger to themselves and other...he also said he would not personally get authorities involved for misdemeanor offenses (unless it became a chronic problem) - like finding a small amount of marijuana in your child's room.

185 2

Okay! I actually read my husband the question on here and he has another answer. He said "NEVER" when it comes to discipline. He said those calls are out of line and irritate all the guys on patrol.

View More
2 6

I believe that there are times you should call the police. I have an 11 and 12 year old in my home and a 14 year old step-daughter. I have never had to call the police on any of them yet, and I pray that I never have too.
My husband was on the local fire department so we know many police officers. I spoke to one of them a while back and he told me that there was a 13 year old girl that was being raised by her grandmother that was having problems. He said the first time he went over there, he spoke to the girl and explained what she was doing, how it was going to get her in more trouble, along with the consequences. He also told her how lucky she was and that he could not understand why she was acting this way toward he grandmother that loves her, takes care of her, and wants the best for her. He also gave the grandmother other options that she could try along with his cell number to call if anything got out of hand. After this first visit, a week later he just popped in. He did this a many times and random times of the day. Once he was sure that things were better, he started spacing out his unexpected visits. Now, this child has done a lot of work improving herself, and is more helpful to her grandmother. He told me that most of her problems were with the people she was hanging out with and with the fact that she could not be with her mother that was in jail. This officer is the same officer that arrested he mother.
My 11 year old has anger issues and he is getting a lot better with handling his anger. It has been a lot of work on him, his father and my part. Staying consistant was the hard part, exspecially when I was not feeling good or just tired. It has taken about 9 years to get to where we are but with the length of time it has taken, it is well worth it.
My 12 year old is a normal (what I call normal) pre-teen girl. The attitude, smart mouth, and being boy crazy. I have a lot of work with her a head of me on these issues.
My 14 year old step-daughter acts just like her mother in many ways, which is not a good thing. She lives about 20 minutes from us and we have only seen her once in 6 months. Her mother has admitted to brain washing her to hate her dad because of me. The only reason I know of is that I spend quality time with her, and her mother (from what I am told) does not. I have had 1 inccident with her and when I spoke to her dad about it, he thought I was just making stuff up. After a few times of her doing this, I had her dad on the phone when it happened. When he got home from work, he was ticked off. He spoke to her and she told him that her mother told her, she did not have to do anything I said. He corrected that problem real quick.
I know it may not seem like I have had to deal with major issues yet, but the problems I have had with some of the issues, and I have tried everything, I spoke to a friend on the police department that helped me handle the issue when it was first starting.
If I ever had to call the police, it would be to any type of assalt, theft, valdalism, or anything worse. I know it would be hard but I would also know that their futures depended on it. This may not help many people much, but I think if you have communication at an early age, you are honest with them, and let them know whats going on (pending the details on their age) with the situations that will affect them, it will make it easier as they get older. I also had to get in the mind set that I could not get mad at what they tell me, at lease they are talking to me to help them with a problem or situation. I also told my kids that if they do not tell me when they have done something wrong that they know they will get in trouble for and I find out, that there punishment will be a lot worse. When I first started telling them this, I made a chart with what they did wrong, consequence if they told me about it , and the consquences if i found out. This helped a lot. I also hope this helps someone to make things easier for them and their children in the future. This may not have been the place to post this and I am sorry if it is not.

6
180 21

Do not call the police if you are using it as a scare tactic. If your child has done something that could be construed as breaking the law (stealing money from you) and you get the police involved, you may lose control of the situation and thing could go further thatn you had origianlly intended. Once you call them, you can't take it back.

6
31 52

Agreed. It's disconcerting that ANYONE would consider police involvement for DISCIPLINE. That's not their job. If the kid is involved in criminal behavior that is beyond one's ability....then yes, that may need to involve police intervention.

0 0

exactly! that's what i was trying to convey.. they are not here to do the disciplining. let them do their police work

0 0

I involved the police when my oldest daughter stole my credit card and made some charges. If I had to do it all over again.....I WOULDN"T!! It ended up that she made some serious accusations against me and got her GAL to buy into it and now even tho she is almost 20, I am still having to go to court with SS and cave into things concerning my other younger children(11 & 9) that I dont want to do...like let them visit her. It has been nothing but heartache on our end while the county pays for her college and gives her whatever is in her best interests regardless of who it hurts. Tread very carefullly here!!!!!

180 21

Christine i understand. While thing with my child never went THAT far, there were isses with lies told ot various authority figures that put me in a very difficult position. I even got SS called on me because of one incident, luckily they found that the accusations were unwarranted, but you never know. With SS the outcome depends heavily on the person they send to investigate the situation and if that person takes a dislike to you or has any preconceived notions about what is going on instead of coming inwith an open mind life can be hell as you have discovered. Yesterday was the anniversary of the murder of one of my daughter's friends. She ranaway from state custody at 15 and they failed to report her missing nationally. She was murdered by her pimp a few months later and her body dumped on the lawn of some suburban homeowner nearly 3000 mile away from home. We still miss her. Her mother's life was also torn apart by her daughter;s lies and now all she has is a memory of how badly thngs turned out. Keep the faith and I ope you life turns around very soon, praying for you and for your daugter, she has no idea what she has really done.

0 0

This is true. Don't trust the police. Your kid already proved to be a threat to you for you to have to call the police, so expect they will say whatever they can to turn it on you. The system is jonesing to have their claws in your kid. Your kid in the system is a big money maker. Thing is, you could be fine with the bad kid in the system...c'est la vie!...but if you have other ones, be very afraid. Don't call the pigs, they are stupid...99.9 percent of cops have a substandard IQ. That is why they get into this job. They cannot use their brains. They are front line soldiers who only know how to take direction. Has anyone ever noticed how angry they get? It's because they have an issue with their own denseness and try to hide behind their uniform and weapons on the belt. Do not doubt this. Attorneys and the non-profits as well have negative things to say about cops as well. In fact one attorney told me never to call them unless you are about to be murdered. Yes, follow this. Now as far as your rowdy kid goes, you are smarter than your kid. Try to calm the situation down, play nice or whatever you have to do..even ignore their defiance, and then go ahead and don't get them braces. Forget their orthodontics. Don't bother with them...no new shoes, no new clothes. Broccoli for dinner. Only if they start smashing you around, be prepared to take a video of them with your phone rushing you, whacking you. Or hidden cameras. That will be evidence to show the pigs when they come...and that is the only time you should call...when you have proof of the harm they caused you. And don't let the kid know you're filming it. In fact when the cop shows up, show it in private. Then whatever the kid says ...probably lying since the kid will have no idea you taped it... then you will probably be free of the worry of the Guard Asshold Lydum (the correct acronym for GAL). Sum this up to say be very afraid of the "law". You can fix this yourself by just giving your kid the bare minimum till the kid figures out they're spiting their face...get it?

View More
16 6

Having raised 2 kids who gave me 6 grandchildren and having been a 9-1-1 operator, the only time you should call the police is if they will hurt someone or themselves. If they steal you should report them. But for everyday disipline problems, the police are too busy to help raise your kids. Only in an emergency should you call the police. i.e. the child threatens to harm you or someone else, the child threatens to hurt themselves, the child has stolen something, the child is using drugs or partaking in other illegal activity. The best thing a parent can teach their child is to respect others and the law. Then set the example for them. Don't lie, cheat, or steal as they will do what you do.

My kids knew I would not put up with bad behavior. When my son got in my face and was yelling at me (he was 17) I grabbed a handful of chest hair and yanked. He will be 40 soon and still will not yell at me. Children need to have boundries and limits and if you never set any for them, then you will have problems. Tough love is the best kind of love. It says I care about you and don't want you to end up a jerk or criminal.

5
0 0

I think that you are absolutely correct! On all accounts. My husband is LE and he hates to go to a call becuase someone's kid won't go to bed. Of course he does his job as he is called out to do. and he will help the parents out by talking to the kids. The police are the good guys and of course will help anyone who calls, but I think that you should make sure they are doing something unlawful in order to call them. Just my two cents.

3 0

I'm also a former 911 Dispatcher and grandmother. From what I've seen of tough love it screams rejection of the child. The child will obey because they are afraid, not because they want to obey out of respect and love. It is better to work on yourself as a parent and determine why the child is so angry, and try to fix that. Somethings are out of your control, such as a spouse leaving, but I've found if you can lower the tone and pitch of your voice, and remove the anger from your own voice, choose supportive and loving words, all children will respond to that in a positive manner. Threatening to abandon and reject a child just doesn't work in the long run.

4 0

unfortunately grabbing a handful of chest hair or grabbing anything can lead to abuse charges this day and age. My son 16 has been selling pot. I started going through his phone and found half of his school looking for 20.00 bags. Some kids requesting weed to smoke with their father. I tested him with the store kit and it came out negative. To my surprise I realized my son had ordered synthetic urine on line and kept it with him at all times. I don't know what to do! He has been in the house all week. I have confiscated phones and ipad/ipod. He knows how disappointed we are and I have cried a mountain of tears. He told me he would stop however kids lie. I would welcome any suggestions. I have read in his messages that he was looking for an ounce to buy, that was one month ago.

View More
0 0

When? It is not the police departments job to discipline your child. You are the parent. You had them not the police. The police should only be called if the child is a viable threat to themselves, you or others. If your child is a criminal and committing criminal acts then call the police. It use to piss me off to see a parent telling their child if you don't behave that police officer is going to put you in jail. Way to go, teach that child to fear the police.

I'm sorry but I really dislike people using the police like this. It's not what their job is. I come from a law enforcement family and it's gotten worse as time goes on that parents don't take the responsibility to parent their own children. If you have a friend that is a police officer ask them to talk to them as a friend not an authority figure.

I'm sorry if I hurt anyone's feeling but be a parent not their friend.

4
0 0

I think you are 100% wrong... If a child is in danger, using drugs, committing crimes, etc. Then it is a parents responsibility to call the police. Withholding information like this is wrong. "Using police"? How do you figure that this is using the police? Please explain to me what their job is if it's not to protect and serve... I suppose if it's not that then I've got that all wrong. I am 100% pro parent, and as I said I believe you are wrong, If I ever caught my daughter with drugs, I would have to call the police. just the way it is. You do the crime you do the time.

0 0

So what I think you're wrong. Saying that I'm wrong is ignorant since no one said the "child" is doing drugs. Don't assume things. If I had caught my kids with drugs I would't have had to call the police because I would have handled it. The person they got the drugs from would have had a visit from the police. If you don't know what using the police is then you would never understand. Be a parent, learn to teach your child what's right and wrong, don't think everyone else has to raise the child for you. The police job is not to be a parent to your child. Their job is only to come in when there is a danger to them or you. Surely you aren't so ignorant as to think that they have to parent your child then you have no clue. No don't bother cause I have no rason to respond to any more of your ignorance.

3 0

Those that work in law enforcement, dispatchers or officers, don't like to see parents use the police to raise their kids, and treat the police like the bad guys. I agree 100%. Again, it is better to work on yourself as the parent. The hardest things I ever had to do when raising my children was to admit to them I was wrong, and work on changing my own behavior. But trust me when I say all relationships are a system, if you change yourself, the other person has to change in response.

0 0

Your kids wouldn't have told you who they got the drugs from, you are ignorant, but again, you are from a law enforcement family, passing down that front line soldier IQ. How would you get that info, beat the crap outa your kids? Otherwise do you think you are so bright telling parents to be parents ? Your assumptions that this person thinks everyone else has to raise their child is your own wrong assumption. Surely you are as ignorant as your lineage of pigs presents. You have no "rason" to respond to any more of their ignorance? Your brain's got the reason of a raisin.

View More
0 0

Here's the thing. I am a mom and a spouse of a Police Officer. I will admit I have not read through all of the posts, but have read through several. I can tell you the Police do not mind coming out to calls where there is a real problem, damaged property, battery etc. However, they do not enjoy coming out to calls where the parent has called because little Johnny isn't listening and refusing to do his chores. When the Officer feels as if he is raising your child, then it is more a problem of the parenting than the child. I am not suggesting that anyone here has done this. I am saying as a spouse of a Police Officer, I can tell you nothing is more irritating than getting called for something the parent could have taken care of. I understand that there are times when the Police do need to be involved and they know it too. I am only asking parents to use any other disciplinary tactics you feel comfortable with before calling police.

4
0 0

well said!

0 0

I'm also a LEO spouse and I completely agree. If the child is doing something that is illegal or of harm to themself or others, absolutely call the police - that's why they're there. If it's a situation where the child has a bad attitude or isn't listening, that's something that probably would be better dealt with through other channels - discipline or getting a counsellor involved.

3 21

When the child has mental health issues & counseling/doctors aren't helping sometimes its necessary. We have had a few instances were I have called & it was extremely helpful. I am very appreciative to them coming & helping me. There's a proper time and a reason for it.

View More
9 4

Life is difficult and there is no book On how to raise children. We try our best from what we have learned from our parents. Whether we had a great childhood or bad. We are supposed to learn from the past and break the viscous cycles of abuse. 

If we had a bad childhood or grew up poor and now can provide for our children we tend to over indulge and spoil them. We need to learn self control before we can teach it. 

With that being said our children act out to gain attention of some sort. Whether the parents are fighting or divorced. Whether the child is being bullied or abused. Whether your a hands on parent or just doing what you consider your best due to your circumstances. 

Children are curious by human nature. If you talk to them and give them the information and tools to form proper decisions chances are they will deter from drugs, smoking, drinking, crime, & sex. 
I talk to my kids all the time. My 16 year old though he is very popular, quick with the tongue is also very intelligent for his age and makes decisions based on  The tools I have instilled into him.  (he is my stepson who lives with us and our 3 other children). He has come from a broken home, a rotten early  childhood, his mom has been divorced 2x's, foreclosures, repossessions of personal things, boyfriends coming and going, and his other siblings movie g with their dad while he was dropped of at our home while she moved to another state. She see's him every 6 mths). From this he should be a rebel kid, trouble maker, etc.. But he's not... We had our issues at 1st but he had soon learned what is expected of him as well as what he should expect from us. 

As a parent you can not tell your children not to do something if you do. "you can't smoke"... As your holding a cigarette. Be a role model not an hypocrite.  Yes you can indulge in a glass or wine or beer but being a drunk is inappropriate. 

No matter how time restricted you are have 1 meal with each other at the table. I include the kids in on preparing dinner from setting the table to cleaning up. Talk about your days. Allow everyone a voice. 

From an early age never be what I refer to as a " Couch parent". The type of parent who yells across the room to stop certain actions as they are screaming. Get up, down to their level and address the situation. They will learn that you mean business as well as you respect. 

Calling the police is necessary if the child is putting himself or others in danger. You have to be prepared for the police to take control from you and do it the legal way. You can't expect them to not follow the law. 

Take a step back think things through than take charge. 

Being an active parent is best. I'm not saying join the PTA or PTO just talk to them no matter how embarrassing the subject. If you don't they'll get the information from their peers. 

Educate yourself find out who their friends are, family background, grades, activities, have them over. Take time to introduce yourself even if they are picking your kids up to go somewhere. Make your face known with other parents. 

Make a routine. 
Come home from school, snack, homework, than free time (till dinner). Than we clean up and either watch a tv show together or allow personal time alone. This is mine. It works best for us may not for others. 

We can try our best but sometimes we need help. Maybe even our children do and we have to except that we can not be ashamed.

4
3 22

I find it interesting that you say it's OK to have a glass of wine infront of your kids but that you can't smoke. If they are BOTH legal for me to do and I am of legal age, why would one be ok and the other not? You said you would be a hypocrite iF You are holding a cigarette and tell them they can't smoke yet you would not be a hypocrite if you tell them they can't drink while holding a beer or glass of whine! I find that amazingly hypocriteal. Why would you & your children not?

0 0

I don't know that she was saying you can't smoke but that if you do you can't say don't smoke to your kids....it doesn't work well. My girl's dad says if I catch you smoking I'll break your fingers but yet he smokes....she has no respect for it. Why is it okay for him to if he doesn't want her too and I think that is what the lady who posted this meant. If you want to say your under age and can't drink or smoke until your 18 then your not being hypocritical but legal. However if you don't want your kids to drink or smoke then they won't truely respect your opinion unless your not. Also she didn't say it was okay to drink but not smoke. I think she was refering to teaching kids to drink responsibly rather than be a drunk. That was how I took it.

9 4

Yes, that is what I meant. The lady above read what she wanted. If she would have continue reading she would have read having an occasional glass of wine is not hypocritical (especially because we are of legal age) but being a drunk is hypocritical because it shows lack if control, no respect for others as well as yourself. As well as many other issues. Smoking is just like alcoholism. It is addictive in many ways. Many would disagree and that is okay. The real topic here is teaching your kids respect and morals so you never have to second guess your actions.

3 0

Bravo! You said it right there - you can't teach self control, or anything else, until as a parent you exhibit it yourself. If you want your child to talk to you in a tone that shows respect and caring, then you must speak to them in that same tone. You can't threaten to reject and abandon a child all the time and expect good things in return.

View More
6 0

I know this blog is for moms but as a father of two teen boys I would like to chime in if I may. I have an older son 17 who is really the perfect kid....always respectful and courteous to everyone, holds a 4.2 gpa with all Ap classes and does well, volunteers, officer in student council etc.........Then I have a 14 yr old who is totally the opposite and has somewhere down the line figured it's easier to disobey us, get in trouble at school, not do his homework etc...I would like to add that we don't ever compare him to his older brother, I don't think that's a good thing for a parent to do, we do ask him to make an effort and do the best he can and at least make passing grades . I do have to admit that he has anger issues and he has been in therapy and put on medications for many years now and taken off meds then placed back on them again. I find it shocking that some of the comments here seem to blame the parents for their child's actions. My wife and I along with many others do consider ourselves to be excellent parents. We are very involved in both of our children's lives, sports, fishing, homework, school, yard work etc......We stay involved! However, there are children who no matter what is told to them , no matter what you do to them, take away from them etc....are going to defy you to no end! We have that child! There's a point where nothing works despite talking to them until your blue in the face and warning them that they could end up in the penal system. I would like to address the comments made by several that police aren't there to babysit your children, you are partially correct. However, your community police are also there to serve the community, and if that means getting an officer involved so that your child knows what can happen to them then you should call them. Yes the police can be busy at times but then again, having them come out may be what saves your child from becoming who the police are looking for in the future. Small price to pay.....

3
5 10

Vince, thank you so very much! It is refreshing to hear from a dad and to feel supported in this way.

0 0

Seriously folks... There are two seperate questions here: "When is it appropriate to call the police on your children?" Are we talking about your six year old who walked out of the pet food store with a dog bone in their pocket. Do we really want to take the police off the streets to tell your child that was the wrong thing to do? Seriously, man up and PARENT your child! That is YOUR job. Are we talking about the child who is building a bomb in the garage? Then yes, at that point you should get the police involved. However, if you were parenting, you would have been able to discern prior to the bomb building there was an issue with your child. The other question posed was, "At what point is it okay to get the police involved in your child's discipline?" The ANSWER by any INTELLIGENT parent should be NEVER!! The police motto is: "To Serve and Protect". At what point does it become their job to discipline your children. Answer, NEVER! Discipline is your parental job..... C'mon Man!!!!

3
1 20

MIchelle u must have never had to deal with an out of control teenager. Not that ANYONE has to justify anything for you because obviousloy you have no clue. I am a single mom who disciplined and did everything in my power to raise my chioldren. we had time outs, spankings, groundings, writing sorry notes, saying apologize. ,I went to conferences, school functions, did homework with them, had familyu dinners, took them to parks, zoos, educational places, libraries, put notes in their lunchboxes, read them books before bed, hugged them, kissed them, told tme i loved them daily. etc and as older teenagers they chooswe to bully me, swear at me, break my things in my house, drink, smoke, skip school, etc. The police are there to help the community. as u recall back in the day there was a saying "it takes a village to raise a child" I needed help and I aSKED for it and the police officers were awesome and kind and they helped me. i appreciate their kindness and understanding.

0 0

You are lucky to have found cops you consider are kind and understanding. But it is always a crap shoot when you call the cops. Google what cops do on YouTube, During car stops, or doing anything. Also cops are different in different parts of the country. Some have to bring in the money for the state all sorts of ways...traffic tickets, kids in juvenile, parents paying to get their kids out. Seriously don't trust the system, don't trust the cement heads on the front lines. If they are nice to you they are on the depressive side of their bipolar disorders.

0 0

I don't know where you live so cannot speak to the legal parameters you are constrained by. I live in Michigan. In Michigan, I am legally responsible for almost anything my child does or fails to do. It is not law enforcement's fault, but it is the legal system I have to work with. Having said that, the bar for what is considered child abuse here is extremely low. If I spank my kids bottom and leave a red mark I am guilty of child abuse. So my reality is that I am responsible for my child in a legal sense, but constrained on what I can do to my highly defiant child. We have been through all the usual: family therapy, individual therapy, psychologists, psychiatrists, medication, school counseling etc etc. Nothing has worked and my 16 yo daughter is still a total bully even though we have taken every privilege there is to take and she still doesn't have them back. She does drugs, she is abusive, she has stolen my car. If she was a grown man like me, I would have beaten her ass for the disrespect pain and suffering she has caused. I have worked full time and ran 2 businesses so my wife can stay home with her to no avail. So you believe that though the law is dictating all the rules I have to play by in raising my kids that I shouldn't use them as a resource when needed? That is naive.

View More
0 29

I agree that you should call the police to get involved if they are breaking the law or they are a threat to themselves and/or others.

Don't call the police because they won't get out of bed for school. Sounds silly, but my husband who is in law enforcement has had to respond to such calls...seriously people!

3
4 2

That is BS, because MOST states have truancy rules and law enforcement is supposed to enforce the laws, are they not? I have a teenager who refused to go, the school did nothing, I would physicially put her out on the porch and if she didn't get the bus she would be locked out of the house (she was 15-16). There was NO way as a parent I was going to support or enable her to sleep in my home when she was supposed to be getting an education. The result, I had to place her on what we call PINS.. took 4 months to get that in place, when she turned 16 they told me that NOW she was of "compulsurary age" meaning it was her decision to go, but get this.. AS a parent of a minor, it was my legal obligation to make sure she got to school. Nice. So yes, I got to point where I had to call law enforcement and it worked. The police did NOT mind, I have in fact met some of the finest state troopers from this and they had kids so they understood. I was even sent a letter personally from one of those officers telling me it was refreshing to have met with a parent that was willing to go the extra mile. My daughter blew her Junior year of HS but now she's a senior and is seeing how tough it is to make up for those lost credit's and she actually made honor role this year.

18 0

I agree with you Linda, Everyone is saying wait until they have broken the law. If they are doing smaller things like not going to school or skipping school, trust me, it won't be long before they will be doing the major crimes like stealing and drugs. Then it is too late. If I had a child that was doing something that is not criminal like skipping school, I too would call the police. Who cares if certain officers have to get off their bums and come and assist in getting a child to school. They complain about coming to these types of situations but if I force her to go they will be coming to pick me up. It's not getting the police to do your job as a parent, it's called intervention. Why sit around and wait til your child does drugs and starts stealing. The police are getting paid to do a job. So they shall do it. God bless

48 0

I don't agree. My husband never got up and got to school and his mother didn't give a CRAP! She just slept in and called the police when he drank or whatever....she was the laziest mother I've ever seen. It's not difficult to get your children out of bed and in school. If you don't demand respect, you won't get it. That's the truth in this type of scenario. He punched holes in her wall, would come back at all hours of the night.....I blame it on her laziness. I was a pretty wild child too, but somehow my parents made me go to school WITHOUT the police. If you don't have what it takes to discipline your child, don't have one! And don't leave it up to the police! I know several people I went to school with who dropped out...I know the parents too and it's quite clear to me that they are lazy parents. "if I force her to go they will be coming to pick me up." Please. That is the most ridiculous crap I've ever heard. If you want your child to become a productive member of society, then act like you care! It really shows the police you don't care to discipline your child when you don't go out of your way to enforce the rules. About truancy laws.....there are special officers for that.....they're called truancy officers. I would think to be more concerned about your ability to parent if you're calling the officer on your own child.

0 0

linda walker..how did this turn around from truant to honor roll happen? Suddenly..she found out how hard it was to catch up , then suddenly she's an honor roll student? Somewhere in there you failed to mention something that would make this believable. But hey the cops saved the day. Except I don't believe the cop wrote you a note. Come on now. Liars stand in the corner, time out for you.

View More
0 3

I'm absolutely astonished. I 'm not stupid I know mental illness is a big problem and that a lot of parents have difficulty with their children but I never realized how bad things were for so many people. I pray to God that I never have to even consider calling the police on one of my own children.
All the politicains are on TV talking about jobs and the deficit but America is undergoing a crisis that is deeper than poverty.Forget about breast cancer We need a cure for bipolar illness.

3
0 5

if you go to conductdisorders.com and read posts there, you will see things can be frightening, horrendous difficult every minute of every day for some families. BUT the police are not who provides help- doctors, mental health professionals are

0 0

Alot of "Health Professionals" are just as screwed up as the people they are supposedly helping

0 0

Yep Christine a lot of them are screwed up even more than those they should be helping. And about bipolar, one of the cures would be to stop putting kids inside of boxes and making them move to the Pavlovian bell. Rather, this would help much of the bipolar society of adults as well. We have a society geared toward sitting and doing computer and paperwork. Lots of reasons why people are mentally ill..because society is mentally ill. And those in charge of toning down problems ...the cops...are also mentally ill. Problem is they're the sickos who are allowed to show up at your door, armed and ready. That should worry you the most.

View More
0 0

You can give opinions of what you might do or how you might react to a situation that needs more attention than you can give it but until you've lived through it you really don't know. My son was and is not on drugs. He suffered an emotional breakdown because of experiencing a devastating emotional trauma. Without going into details, it was enough to have him completely change his personality. One week night he did not come home from school. I thought perhaps he was staying after school for an activity, but when it became 10:00 p.m. and no sign of him, I began calling friends and even called the school's principal. They assured me he was in school that day, all day. His friends said that they saw him that afternoon. After going crazy for over an hour, I received a phone call from a neighbor who said they had seen my son walking down the middle of the road about 4 miles away... They picked him up and brought him to their house because he didn't want to come home. The next day he came home , locked himself in his room and proceeded to destroy everything in his room, when I tried to enter the room he pushed me against the stairway and would have thrown me down the stairs if his older sister did not step in between us. Then he proceeded to break things and throw them at us, we were unable to control him so I called a "hot line" and they basically blew me off and said , "if he's violent , call the police". With a VERY heavy heart and EXTREME emotions I did.... He was taken to the hospital for evaluation and began counseling the next day... My message: "Sometimes it is out of our hands, don't let your heart rule your mind, they need help and so do you, so if it means calling the police , do it". I am happy to say that today my son is a VERY successful business man and a happy young man. (K)

3
31 1

It depends a lot on your local system. In our town, there is a "hanging judge" who will not listen to any evidence on the part of the defendent and gives maximum sentences plus totally uncalled for tongue lashings that include truly demeaning charachter demolition. My son was stopped once for taking a shortcut. His truck had been borrowed by a friend the night before and son had no idea that there was anything illegal in it. They found a brand new, unused marijuana pipe and son ended up in court. Despite the fact that paraphernalia is legal to SELL in our city and it was clean, the judge threw the book at him....rehab, AA, AND jail. Jail turned out to be clear across the state and my son was badly victimized there. Things we sent that were on the approved list never reached him. He was forced to pay protection to a big guy or worse could have happened. His bunk was an upper, right under the airconditioning duct and they were allowed ONE thin blanket. He was the youngest and smallest there and the first day all of his underwear and socks were stolen except what he was wearing. All of it was marked and the guards would do nothing to locate it. You could only buy hygeine items from the store in the jail, with a 3 ox. shampoo costing $5 and a toothbrush costing $8. Deoderant, soap...everything was overpriced. Food was horrible with some having mold on it. Complaints to the sheriff did not gain any improvements. Books sent to him were never delivered. I finally bought multiples of crossword puzzle books, colored pencils and such that were for him to share and that calmed down a lot of the guys. (Oddly no crayons or markers were allowed, but colored pencils were.) I bought him heavy undershirts and all but one was taken...again despite labelling. His food was taken from him at meals and several days he went without a scrap until he "hired" the protector. It was a totally horrendous experience and he came home weighing 105 pounds (down from 130), broken, bruised and battered by "accidental collisions", horrendous nightmares, withdrawn, unable to sustain sleep, He ALSO took up marijuana since he'd already been punished for it without using it. The whole affair cost us well over $6000, not counting follow up care with a psychiatrist for his fears and nightmares. It's been three years and he's still paranoid and had after-effects.

I would NEVER turn him in here because of that. But, if we had fair judges and safe jails locally, I might consider it as a last resort, except for our experience.

3
0 0

You should try and get a lawyer and sue the crap out of the state. Hanging judges have to answer, too. Go to administrative court about this. Sue the bastards. This is what happens when you get the ILL LEGAL system involved! Horrifying but I expect to hear this...it's happened to many people.

31 1

Angela and Teamarilyn....I'm so sorry not to get back to you, but between being out of town and being ill, I missed notification of your responses. Angela, he had just turned 19....a young 19 at that and he's learning disabled. Teamarilyn, I agree, but he doesn't want to have anything more to do with lawyers or courts and he's of age to refuse to sue. Thanks to you both for responding.

View More
5 3

We have four adopted children. Our youngest son was born with Cocaine in his system and it has caused him problems. Particularly now that he is starting puberty. We have a great relationship with our town's police and they have helped us tremendously, even to the point of protecting our son from the county police. We called because he had sliced open his older brother's thumb with a knife and though we asked for our town police the county police showed up also. If the county police had gotten involved our son would have had a record. We have family counseling, he takes medication to help him with control and he recognizes that they help him.

However, he is prone to poor choices. Would I call the police again. Absolutely! Does he know I'll do it. Yes. Hopefully, that will make him think twice.

3
0 4

The issues with your son are probably more due to alcohol exposure than cocaine. 80% of cocaine users also drink. This means that there is likely frontal lobe injury. This part of the brain is what controls rational decision making. I am not sure that anything can make these kids really think twice. Consequences are rarely understood by them. 40% of people in prison were exposed to alcohol. My adopted daughter was cocaine and alcohol exposed. And this is my area of specialty...good luck with you son.

36 5

Well if they break the law then it may be necessary - now it does depend on circumstances for instance if you realise your teen has been taking items from a shop, maybe the best approach is for them to return them and apologise, not getting the police involved as long as the store agrees, HOWEVER ifs its repeated then maybe they need a lesson learned, maybe its a psychological problem and medical professionals could help? No two circumstances are alike, and its not a black and white issue - its easy to sit and type you must have zero tolerance and report everything but nothing in life is that simple.

Now if violence is involved, yes it probably is a must you contact the police, or a professional that can help with anger - but again however cross you are with them, its important you are still their parent, and ensure you get to the bottom of why they are exhibiting behaviours. I love to think the police would support parents in these difficult circumstances but we know that isn't always the case so we need to make a judgement call ... BUT if the crime committed is a serious one, covering up is never right, huge difference between a fight between two teens that parents can sort between themselves and and a one sided assult.

3
0 5

If I have to call the police on my children, i will be the one to go to jail.

2
7 6

I don't follow, why would you go to jail if you had to call the police?

0 2

I had to call the police on my son after several warrants and then he passed my younger son a fraudulent check for $500.00. My heart is breaking, but I know that I have done everything in my power to help him and it is beyond me now. He needs to stop and take responsibility for these things he keeps doing and does not answer for. He just keeps running. I almost had a nervous breakdown after calling the police, and am slowly trying to dig myself out of a deep depression. The police in our town are sometimes worse than the criminals. The police here make criminals out of young people and all the court wants is money. No one cares about helping these kids get back on the right track so calling the police may be the wrong thing to do. Heartbroken in Arizona

2
0 0

I am soooo sorry and know where you are speaking from!!!

0 5

When they are breaking the law.

2
0 5

police are not the expert on YOUR child. They do not (usually ) KNOW your child. They do not have training for these things, they are not the expert. You do not know what personal baggage an officer might carry from his (her) own past that might affect his (her) way of handling the issue at hand. Once you call police you possibly can lose all control over how the problem is handled and once you get to that point things might not go at all how you planned. Then if you have a special needs child, one with a psychiatyric disorder (diagnosed or undiagnosed) you do not know how the officers handling might affect things............(officers are not trained in mental illness, either, no matter what many believe- and can make things much much worse, even explosive)

2
0 5

yes I have 2 special needs children, 3 children, a very disabled husband.... my children are now adults, and yes it was a rocky road at times..............and I was VERY active in the mental health community here- and in the police dept and court system and now have 2 grandchildren

0 5

for people who might want supprt for such things, I found CABF and Conductdisorders.com to be very helpful resources

3 0

Bingo, the police are not experts in this field. They go through training in all kinds of things, but much of what they do they do by their ability to make quick decisions on the spur of the moment, they decide what to say without any time to think about it, and they really are not training in this either in college or during their field training. Some cops are good kind hearted people who will take the time to try to help you and your children. Some cops are cold hearted and sinister and I would never want them talking to me or my children. When you call 911 for help with your children you really are taking a crap shoot in the dark as to what kind of person shows up on your doorstep to help. Don't be naive and think all cops love children and will be good at this. If you must get help, get a professional counselor, and if you are poor and can't afford it, go to your school counselor or your County mental health office.

View More
0 0

I never had and never will... Reading all your answers, I start to feel that I'm really a lucky single mom.
My older girl is now 23 years old and still studies and also has a job, does not drink or smoke and is a good girl. My boy is now 17, is a senior in high school and also sings in a choir near our home. He does not drink or smoke and spend all his time sudying or singing.

I really thought that what I live with my two kids was the "normal situation" for a single mom, but, ladies, you really scared me, maybe when they were a little younger I had some troubles with discipline, but I solve them all by myself, without spanking them, but always taking away from both the things they loved the most, and telling them that they were going to lose more things when they behave bad.

By the way, for me, behave bad means, come home after the hour the have permission to stay out, or do not do their home activities like, help with the laundry and stuff like that.

Ladies, I have a good life and two helpful, healthy kids, and I'm grateful for that!

2
0 5

You should be thankful and thank God every day! I also disciplined my kids along the way. Time outs, taking away things- I never spanked them either- and have often wondered if I shouldn't have! So far, my daughter is awesome. But, I also believe it"s a learned behavior. My son witnessed alot more things from his dad than my daughter did.

0 0

AMEN sister! Phew! A mom who thinks like me.I have a 7y.o. and a 3 month old! I am scared of "mothers" like this... it makes me scared for my future grandchildren to have to be in the same society without me in it with these peoples spawns and or kids they have raised 0_o

View More
57 5

i have called the police on my 11 year old but don't know if it did any good they put her in the police car and i met them at the hospital my daughter threw a phone at me and hit me in the eye so that why i called police they did an evaluation on her and the next day cps showed up at my door and trying to tell me that i need to pay more attention to her it wrong i take care of my daughter and police in my area think if your kid hits you there nothing u can do about it and they tell you can't spank that why kids are so messed up today when i was younger if i would have hit my parents i would have got a spanking i would have never forgot now a days your kids can beat u up and there nothing u can do about it kids need discipline

2
4 0

i took my 11 year old to the police,more as a scare tactive as he was threatning kids at school with violance and other miss behavior. the sarg was very good and spoke about the concequences if it continues and he is of an age that he could be charged etc plus took him to see the cell that hit him the most. i was there whikle the sarg was talking.

0 0

My daughter threateded to take a hammer to my locked bedroom door and me if I got in the way. I had her probation officer on the other end of the phone and nothing happened to my daughter. But if I had threatened that I bet I would have been locked up for a long time. I went online after to research parental abuse and no such thing exists unless its abuse of the elderly. Unbelievable but true

View More
17 13

I had this problem with my one daughter. No matter what we did at home, or the programs she had to go to, nothing worked. She was on probation for shop lifting and had to do community service. I, myself caught her shop lifting in a store I used to work in wnen she was suppose to be at her community service. I took her to the manager of the store, and because I worked there at one time, he was going to let her go and not let her in without me. I did the hardest thing a mother could do. I told him "no' she needs to learn". I had to stand there and watch my daughter go with the police. I then had to watch in court as she was in handcuffs and be sentenced to 21 days. Her probation officer and her lawyer, and udge thought since nothing else worked, maybe this would. It did. She doesn't hold it against me. She has actually thanked me for not giving up on her. She is now married with two beautiful children.

2
10 2

Being the ex-wife of a law enforcement officer I can tell you that there are times when you should call in the police. These times, however, are only when laws have been broken or people are in danger. My children knew that we would call the police in any of these instances and their opinion was "please put me in jail, my parents will give me a punishment worse than death." While our children have gotten into some trouble over the years, they learned very quickly that they would be responsible for the consequences. My son had to earn the money to replace a girls glasses when he punched her as well as write a letter of apology to her and her parents. The police talked to him about what assualt was and the consequence if the behavior continued. He still has anger issues as an adult but he is aware that it is his choices that create or destroy his life.

Stubborn children (I have six of them) will try your patience until you understand why some animals eat their young. The only way some children learn is through hard consequences. I have always taught my children that every choice, whether good or bad, has a consequence. They were required to deal with the consequences of their decisions. Harsh consequences were buffered when necessary but never eliminated. It is the relationship between a child's choice and the consequences of that choice that needs to be understood. It has been very difficult to watch my children deal with things in their life that could have been so different if they had made a better choice.

2
4 2

I had a boyfriend hit me, my father forced me to press charges, he was the son of an abuser, we pressed charges and saw it all the way to the court where they slapped his hand. it's been 30 years and he has put 2 wives in the hospital, one was in a coma for 2 months. If I had been the boy my father would have done the same thing and got law enforcement involved, assault is not behaving badly, it's an issue that if not corrected from the start can lead to much worse than just some bad decisions. It's a situation where the police and courts have to do their part as well.

46 31

i have 4 children ranging in age from 10 to 17 1/2. i fully believe that if the childs behaviour is dangerous to themselves and/or to others then yes the police should be involved in. if it involves stealing, threatening, physical violence - again the answer is yes. of course there may be other help needed but sometimes it just takes the police to enforce what you are trying to teach them. i do not know what area you live in but where i live even the public schools will call the police in to discuss severe behaviour issues with a child if the behaviour persists. there are also anger management courses that they can be referred to. its a little difficult to answer your question specifically as your statement is rather vague but i hope this helps.

2
4 0

Where we live the law dictates that a parent my use corporal punishment to discipline their child. They also allow the parent to decide to press any charges of violence against their own, unless of course there is obvious injury upon someone from the child...in that instance the juvenile will be detained or even adult child due to domestic assault. I have had to contact the local Sheriff to establish that my teens must follow the guidelines of the home that I provide as their parent. They have always been able to clarify to my children that it is indeed in their best interest to listen and abide by any rules that I may place, and failure to comply can/will result in further consequences.

5 16

Well My Husband and I just had to do this 2 days ago! It was not an easy thing to do to our 11 year old son and the fact that we have two smaller children in the house made it that much harder.However our son recently started having very severe mood swings from one of his mental illnesses and we had taken him to the ER for violent fits and to A mental health crisis center .Each time he gets more violent.The Dr. and staff told us if he became a danger to himself or to others we needed to call the police to come get him and bring him to the crisis center to be baker acted .So we new right away at the begining of the day on Sat. this is what would be hapenning just by the way he was acting.By the time 1pm came he was totally out of control.So I got my 2 younger sons got in my car and called the police while my husband stayed inside with our ill son to do his best to restrain him.I drove to a friends house and waited for my husband to call and tell me it was over.I didnt want to be there and I did not want my other kids to be traumatized more than they already were from his wild and dangerous actions.This is never gonna be an easy decision ,however you will know when you have to do it.And you will feel a sence of releif after it is over knowing that your child can no longer hurt himself or someone else!

1
6 31

I recently did call police on my kids for fighting, it was out of control. I came home to Blood all over my kitchen floor because of them. They were done fighting but I just couldn't deal with them and my punishments didn't seem to phase them at all. The Police came arrested both of them they spent night in juvenile detention center and appeared in front of a judge the next morning. The judge asked me why I had to go to this extreme with my kids. and I was honest. There fighting was out of control when I cant run to the grocery store for 30 minutes without coming home to full blown fighting its out of control. And no punishment I give stops this. The judge did step in and put both on a type of probation that if they mess up again they will get 180 days of boot camp he also required them to go to counseling, community service and several other classes. It helped for awhile. I believe it is up to everyone's own situation to how calling the police should be handled.

1
16 13

Unfortunately I have had to do this and it is not fun ! In cases where your child is endangering him/herself or others, damaging property ect. then it is definitely a warranted move. Two of my sons were having a fist fight in the home one day. When I tried to break it up and was unable to, I had to call them for help. They (my kids) were embarrased but it never happened again

1
0 0

i THINK TOUGH LOVE IS A GOOD THING AT LEAST IT SHOWS YOU CARE ! JUST IGNORING THINGS AND HOPING IT WILL STOP IS NOT A GOOD THING .STOP THE PROBLEM BEFORE IT GETS ANY WORSE!!

1
0 0

I totally agree, i had been puting my sons behaviour down to teenage hormones, but yesterday i had had enough, damaging property in the home and punching doors, i called the police on him and they came straight out, i have 2 younger ones in the house and they had to witness his appalling out burst, i'm glad i done it so now it's just a waiting game to see if it has any affect.

0 4

It depends on where one lives. In my town, I would not call the police if they were the last people on earth. No matter what the crime, if a kid is involved, particularly a boy, they will take it all the way. My son, at the age of 14, grabbed a girl's butt in school...a girl who was sitting in his lap. She reported it and my son was charged with felony sexual assault, arrested and taken to jail. He had to do a year long diversion program. In the mean time the girl had to be removed from the school as she continued to make claims about boys in the school and create problems. Nothing was done to her. However, it did come out that she had been abused, just not by any of the boys at school. She needed help. None was given. But some boys lives were turned upside down. There are many stories like this. Parents here avoid the police.

1
13 0

That girl definitely sounds troubled, but your son is abusing girls if he is grabbing them--especially on school grounds. Sorry, that's reality.

48 0

I do not agree Fiona. If you put yourself in that situation, expect a certain outcome. She voluntarily sat in his lap......he was touching her butt either way whether he put his hand there or not. If she wants to put herself on a boy's lap then that's her problem. I would see how it could be abuse if she was just walking in the hallway and somebody grabbed her butt, however that was not the case.

View More
0 0

Wow, all of these stories are great to read, I had to call the police on my son, when he was 15, It really didn't do me any good. The courts called his dad from another state and had him pick him up. I explained to the courts that his dad was not their for the children. But they let him take him anyway. My son ended up quitting school and not finishing. He did come back to live with me a few years later. So I hope that it all works in your favor. I just wished it would of mine.

1
0 0

the courts or officers don't give a care about our kids.

0 5

I've filed missing person reports on my son when he was 16. He was taken to the police station more than once and I will say, our officers were very good at helping me with him. I also had him arrested after a I got a call from him saying he was in "trouble". I asked where he was and he said, "wal mart". I asked him what he stole. He said, "chicken". I couldn't believe it! Chicken? and energy drinks for him and 4 of his friends. The security guard wanted me to come pick him up. I refused and asked him to call the police and have him arrested. He said, "Ma'am, it's his first offense and it was chicken and drinks. Are you sure you want me to call the police.? Yes! I know this is his first offense, but I wanted it to also be his last. My son also refused to go to school because I took his cell phone after he kicked in my door. "No phone. No school." I refused to give into the manipulation. He refused to see his father. Hadn't seen him in 18 months. Talking to his dad and "working together" was a joke because his "motto" was "whatever happens at your house stays at your house and whatever happens at my house stays at my house". So, I was doing this myself. I also have a younger daughter. Finally the lawyers got involved and my son was forced to move to his dad's. That lasted for 9 months. The last day he was there, his dad called me and said, "he needs to give me one good reason to let him stay because I'm kicking him out" My son left before his dad came home, or dad could have been brought up on abandonment charges. My son came home and at first did really good, but it didn't take him long to get into his old habits. He hasn't done anything illegal- that he's been caught with, and in fact I drug tested him and he was clean- but his words are angry and mean. He will be lucky if he graduates. He's still refusing to go to school and unless he has cigarettes he won't go. So instead of "no phone no school", it's "no cigarettes, no school". Since he's 17, he knows he can drop out if he wants. He has no job. He's a slob. I know that I can kick him out when he's 18, which is very soon, but he really doesn't have any survival skills and I'm afraid he'll either end up in prison or dead. Anybody have any advise for me?

1
7 6

Have you tried therapy? Most states have a teen ranch run through the sheriffs ranch or a teen challenge program. At 17 and in danger of not graduating, JobCorp is an option where he will learn a trade skill and live on campus so he at least will have the ability to support himself.

0 5

He's been in therapy since he was 12 or 13. He had a JO for a little while- til he moved with his dad. Thanks for your suggestion on JobCorp! I will strongly suggest, but at almost 18 (2 days), I can't force him. I feel like my hands have been tied for so long. I've also thought and called about a boys town sort of thing...$30,000 a year, which is almost my annual salary. To be honest, I've pretty much given up on anything I can do. He knows if he is busted for anything after his 18th birthday, and actually since turning 17, he would be tried as an adult. I pray a LOT! and I continuously ask God to keep his arms wrapped around him and keep him safe.

View More
0 15

I have a nephew that is currently in jail for breaking and entering.My sister always thought calling the police on her own children would be the worst thing a mother could ever do so she tryed her best to deal with her son he stared young with behavor issues acting out yelling kicking screaming but it got worse when he started school he was dignosis with ADHA which i beleive its because the school teacher do not have the time to share with the kids like they need too so some like to give kids a label intead of trying to help kids that cant sit still or that my have a slow ness problems .I growing up had a learing issue but with great teachers and a GREAT MOM i turned out okay.My sister ended up allowing him to drop out of high school tryed to pursue him getting his GED but failed at that two he started hanging out with the wrong kids and doing drugs and stealing which only led to bigger things he finally got caught and the police arrested him at 17 years old and charged him as a adult for his crime he got 10 years do three he has done about 2 years and let me tell you i think it would have been easier for my sister and the hole family if he was out ...He has not learned one thing in JAIL yet but how to be a bigger criminal and how to beg and wine for every one to send him money my ponit is I have read all the comments in regards to this topic and i would like to say that the children of this generation do not think they should be held accountable for any of there actions nor should they have to go to school or work that it is the parents JOB to take care of them buy them cars and video games etc....If we as parents do not start standing up to are children and stop trying to be there freinds and be a PARENT intead we all are going to be in BIG Trouble in the future .

1
0 0

My boyfriend ex wife... Keep sending me threats messages but I just ignore it... What I can't stand is she called my daughter as a " BAGGAGE"" my daughter is only 2 years old... No other parent would like to hear that... Any suggestion what should I do?

1

when you child is attacking you

0
    Edit  |   Delete  |   Get Your Widget

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms