Does anyone have any suggestions on how to handle an EMOTIONAL 7 year old???

Lori - posted on 03/07/2010 ( 2 moms have responded )




In the past month or so my 7 year old daughter has taken to MAJOR MELT DOWNS over any little thing along with lying and tantrums. This is not the same easy going, helpful, loving daughter I have always known. Nothing in our household has changed recently. She does have a younger sister (almost 3 yr old) and usually they get along real well but the 7 year old is more into picking fights then playing lately. My husband and I are stumped, time outs use to work to correct her when she acted up in the past but now we usually get hurt in the process of trying to get her to the time out spot ... she has taken to hitting, kicking and pinching if we try to put her there.


Thank you,

Lori Mann


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Janet - posted on 03/08/2010




Hi Sounds like something is bothering her i can only identify that when i pick my daughter up at school she can be in the foulest of moods some days and just wants to pick an argument with me however i do not rise to the challenge later i ask her what has upset her and she usually comes out with something that has happened at school.

Rebecca - posted on 03/08/2010




if this is NEW behaviour, something has happened to her, something has changed for her. it could be something big, or it could be something to us that seems small. perhaps there is something going on at school -- new teacher she doesn't like, teacher picking on her, someone bullying her at school, more pressure at school, etc etc. the thing is to get to the bottom of the problem and to do that, you need to sit down and talk to her on a daily basis about her day and what is going on; ask about how she is enjoying school, what's going on with her friends etc... try asking open ended questions, not ones with yes or no answers. if she goes quiet when you ask a particular question, you are probably getting close to finding out what is triggering this.

as a matter of course, even when we use time outs with our kids (which for us is a last resort) we always sit down and discuss the bad behaviour after the time out and explain why we don't like it, find out why they did that, offer alternative suggestions about what to do to deal with frustration, etc. this way they are left in no doubt that we are prepared to listen to them and that we do things for rational reasons.

only when you find out what is triggering the behaviour can solutions be found. feel free to come back for more advice when you've got to the bottom of it.

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