How do I get my son to quit playing his games and watching T.V. so much?

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Dawn - posted on 09/25/2009

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My kids are allowed 30 minutes on EITHER the computer or xbox each day. And only after they have done their daily chores. I was having issues with backtalk and the kids being inactive so I set up 3 chores each week day. If they don't do them in a timely manner, not only do they get no games or computer, they have to pick an extra chore out of a 'chore jar'. There was a lot of complaining at first, but a few times losing privileges and having extra chores and now they come home from school, check the list on the fridge and get busy hoping to be the first one with access to the computer or xbox. I feel if you don't teach kids that helping around the house is important, and allow them to do whatever they want, you are doing them a horrible disservice and they will flounder when they leave the nest.

Alia - posted on 09/21/2009

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I have my children do chores to earn beans. When they do a chore they get a black bean that they keep in a jar then they can trade it in for something they want. i.e. each bean is worth $0.25, or a half hour of t.v. or video games. Playing outside is free. They loose a bean for misbehaving.
Since I started doing that my kids have watched less tv and video games. Mostly because they want to save their beans to get some pocket money, partly they occasionally misbehave.
It seems to help them learn the value of earning things they want and making priorities.

[deleted account]

We took our daughter's tv away for 3 months once becaue she wouldn't listen and when I would send her to her room to do homework or read she would just turn the tv on and plug her earphones into it so I couldn't hear (she's 7now, but this was back in December when she was still 6). I know that sounds drastic, but it was the only thing that worked. We put her tv back in her room after we all went over a "responsibility contract" and we all signed it. It basically says that she will not watch tv (or play on her Nintendo DS - we added a clause in the contract to cover that when she got it) until EVERYTHING is taken care of.



This means:

(1) in the morning she has to: be dressed, have shoes and socks on, eaten breakfast, brushed her teeth, gotten her hair done, and been approved by me (or her dad)

(2) in the evenings she has to: be changed out of her school uniform, brushed her teeth, done her homework, read for 30 minutes and been approved (again by either me or her dad)



It's worked great so far, but I still do check on her when she is doing her homework and reading to make sure she doesn't go back to her bad habits. It was kind of rough on her at first, but the contract seems to really motivate her (she's big into promises and doing what you say you will).



Good luck!

Alinda - posted on 10/03/2009

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I set rules. No TV without my/or dads permission but mostly mine. I've also gave them a set amount of time to sit infront the TV. 2 30 min shows or one movie. No more than an hour of tv at a time.

During the school week, they normally don't watch tv, except on friday afternoon.

I set my rules, stand firm on it. but then again, my kids are 4 and 6, so there is no fighting back. I intend to continue to stand firm on this.

Kay - posted on 09/25/2009

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Unplug the TV and hide the game controllers in a closet top shelf. Yes this works my sons are 22 and 20. I also have an 8 year old girl so been there done that it works.

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Bagel - posted on 02/08/2014

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My son has an obsession. He sticks his penis into objects. The coach, soccer goal, fruit, gym lockers, exhaust pipes. Well, sure enough his penis is stuck in an electrical socket at school in front of the whole elementary school (he's in high school). I'm getting the ax

Bagel - posted on 02/08/2014

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YOU ARE ALL HEARTLESS PATHETIC EXCUSES FOR PARENTS. DO NOT MAKE YOUR CHILDREN DO FRICKIN CHORES ON TOP OF ALL THE HOMEWORK THEY ALREADY HAVE. LET THEM ENJOY THEIR FREE TIME HOWEVER THEY WANT YOU NAZIS. YOU CAN WORSHIP HITLER, THEY CAN GAME. my god I thought the staff Sargent in full metal jacket was bad

Destiny - posted on 11/09/2013

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Hey moms out there, I'm a 17 year old senior. In order for me to graduate i have to have a senior portfolio, which includes me having to do a documentary on a social issue. the social issue i chose is "television effecting a child's behavior". so i was wondering if you could record yourselves talking about how this has effected your childs life or email me writing about this issue, so i can include in my documentary. @wilson9615@gmail.com

Destiny - posted on 11/09/2013

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Hey moms out there, I'm a 17 year old senior. In order for me to graduate i have to have a senior portfolio, which includes me having to do a documentary on a social issue. the social issue i chose is "television effecting a child's behavior". so i was wondering if you could record yourselves talking about how this has effected your childs life or email me writing about this issue, so i can include in my documentary. @wilson9615@gmail.com

Denise - posted on 09/27/2009

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I would un plug the t.v. and his games and tell him to go play or do something else for awhile and if he does he can have at least half hour of t.v or game before bed. Something like that does work. I have a set schedule with my child and it works great. She gets to watch t.v or play games after homework is done, and any chores are done. And when she is done getting ready for bed she can do eighter one before bedtime.

Trish - posted on 09/26/2009

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have set times for tv set times for games and other then that it is all off and have times for reading or drawing. i do this with my 2 boys and it works quite well and they know if it is on when it is not that time that they will lose it all for a week.

Amy - posted on 09/26/2009

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We have a "no screen time til 6pm" rule. No computers, tv, wii, nintendo ds, if it has a screen they are not to touch it til 6pm. And all of their chores and homework have to be done before screen time starts also. Then they have to get ready for bed and eat plus any extra things in the mean time also, so they are not usually on for over and hour or hour and a half.

Monica - posted on 09/26/2009

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remember your the parent. its hard to put your foot down at first but you need to be firm in your decision and stick to it. try and do things together if possible (family night) make a schedule for tv and game time. TALK to him and find out what other interest he might have that you could do together or get him involved in. when he is good reward him.

Renee - posted on 09/26/2009

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Say he can't watch or play. Set a boundaries that you can live with and follow through with it. It is likely you do not sit down and watch tv until your responsibilities are done, Why should he be any different? Be consistent. If you say the TV and Videogames are not allowed to be turned on until dinner and the dishes are done, then stick to it. It will seem futile to say one thing and not follow through with it. It's possible that your responsibilities of dinner, dishes, etc. might evolve into family responsibilites and at times fun time together?

Debbie - posted on 09/26/2009

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We used to have this problem also until my husband completely removed ALL tv's from the house. We've recently added 2 back, but only for movies...no antenna, cable, satelite attached. It has worked on getting them interested in reading or playing board games. We also do the earn it to use it on the video games since they have DS systems. It seems to work well since they know they have to earn it.

Amy - posted on 09/25/2009

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I have that problem. So after they get home from school I keep the tv off and try to keep them entertained hopefully outside and active. the tv doesn't go on tell after supper and some days they forget about it tell half n hour before bed time.

It will also be hard to enforce if you have a tv in every room if so you may think about just putting in the common areas. as so not to be so tempting if its in their bedrooms.

Taiasha - posted on 09/25/2009

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ummm...Take it or put time limits on when he can play it. When you come in from school homework and studying first. TV an games are a privilege school is an obligation so are chores. Get him involved with other things outside of the home sports, an instrument something! You are the parent you bought the game you electricity runs it if we as parents don't teach our kids how to control themselves someone else will teach them how not to have control. You probably see it as it is just his game but if you can't get him to do something now a little as turning off his game how are you going to later get him to not do all the big things like drugs, alcohol, sex and other things our children face today.

Dorothy - posted on 09/24/2009

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tough love...un plug them. give him a book. or play a board game with him.

we only allow pc, video games ect...on non school nights unless it is a family event.

~~~~my son hated me for a hile too~~~

Lisa - posted on 09/24/2009

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you take it away.
I used to let my boys watch a few OPB cartoons but they would always fight afterwards, so I grounded them from tv for a week and after that week was up they were using their imaginations more, playing together better, and not saying "I'm bored" all the time. So I just took it all away--we've been tv (and game) free for three years now. If we want to watch a movie we watch it on a computer. The kids have limited access to the computer because it is password and mom protected. If they have been good i'll let them watch a half hour of something or play a game with me sitting right there watching. but not watching tv has been the best thing for this family.

Carmen - posted on 09/24/2009

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1 hour or 2 hour time limit!!! and dont give in..if they keep wanting to break that rule unplug and put it up! thats what i did :)

Julwaynla - posted on 09/24/2009

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Give him a schedule from the time he wakes up to bedtime. Allow him to have a certian time for game/T.V. If you see that this is his favorite down time, it can also be used as a reward. He can earn extra game time by completing all tasks.

Vandna - posted on 09/23/2009

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You, yourself will have to indulge in the outdoor games with him and restrict his TV watching to an hour and one hour for playing games. Children need a lot of our efforts and time.

Melanie - posted on 09/23/2009

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My daughter has to ask to play the playstation or watch tv. We have had an issue this year with not doing her homework so I banned tv in the afternoons until she can do an appropriate amount (she gets homework weekly). We would often have music on instead and has lead to much fun in singing and dancing to the different types of music we have in our cd collection.



But ultimately you are the parent and you are the one who decides who gets to do what and how long they get to do it. Tough luck if they don't like it, they can take your new regime or by throwing tantrums etc they can loose the time they have been allocated as they are obviously not old enough to be doing those things.

Tammie - posted on 09/23/2009

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take the games from him and unplug the tv give him a time limit on the games or tv and when that time is up if he doesnt stop u unplug them that what i do

Carrie - posted on 09/23/2009

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My kids also love to watch tv or movies, but they also play together a lot! I would suggest a game without the tv or computor's or maybe some arts and crafts my kids love them! Good Luck!

Diana - posted on 09/23/2009

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I have set times for my 10 yr old son. School days he isn't allowed on the games, but is allowed tv if home work is done. Unplug the games and put them away if he wont listen to you, they'd rather get some time than none! I try to get my son outside for at least a little bit in the day too. On weekends we break his game time up..no arguments or no go the following weekend.

April - posted on 09/22/2009

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You should have other choices available to him that will appeal to him. Stay busy, go for walks, play family board games, etc. After you set limits for him and give him alternate choices he will prefer and expect to do other things besides watch tv. You can also allow for only a certain time each night to be dedicated to watching tv or playing his games.

Jessica - posted on 09/22/2009

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their advice is good, and I agree. I have a 4 1/2 year old boy who rarely watches TV or movies. He loves to do things with me and "help" all the time, so it is easy to direct his attention elsewhere. But, you cant just say "go out and play" especially if you have an only child because that is boring for them, unfortunately, if you want them to do something you have you do it too. Or at least make it seem to them like you are doing it with them :) easier said than done though, especially if you have a busy schedule and a low energy level at the end of the day. Good luck!

Debbie - posted on 09/22/2009

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turn it off! Set firm rules and stick to them, as someone else said early in you are the boss! I don't allow any tv in the mornings before school, unless we are all so ridiculously early we have nothing else to do (never happens). On a school night they are not allowed any of their game things (DS etc) but may watch tv if all else has been done. Any games are strictly for the weekend. otherwise they get kicked out to interact with other human beings. They grumble, but I'm very good at ignoring them now! I'm sure when they get older the grumblings will get worse, but then so can I!

Lani - posted on 09/22/2009

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My daughter knows she needs to earn the t.v. and vid games, so we give her a time limit..... when time is up, time is up. She'll whine and try to get more time, but JUST SAY NO!!

Lisa - posted on 09/22/2009

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we went cold turkey and started with no TV or DS Games on school nights. It was only bad for two nights then they started finding things to play with and read. The very much look forward to Friday night. We are in week three and still doing great!

Jerri - posted on 09/22/2009

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One thing we have done is have family game night. We turn off the tv and make an evening of it. After dinner we have some sort of treat like banana splits or popcorn and play board games. Because of the age of my children we start with hungry hippos or something a 4 year old will enjoy. Then we move to a game more for my 9 year old and the 4 year old helps mommy by rolling the dice or whatever he can help with. Some games that we like are Sorry, Operation, and Yahtzee. We do this on a non-school night so the kids can stay up a little later. It's a great bonding experience for everyone.

RHONDA - posted on 09/21/2009

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I think you should take them away. My kids have TV's in thier rooms but they go off at 9pm. I dont not buy my kids games because I think that they should be doing something more constructive with thier time then playing video games maybe one ady I will change my mind and get them one but they are used to it by now. Of course when you take it you will be the bad guy but he will appreciate it later in life.

April - posted on 09/21/2009

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Quoting Melissa:

How do I get my son to quit playing his games and watching T.V. so much?




Though video games have been found to develop motor skills and some games and television shows can be educational, you really should limit their time with these activities.  My daughter is getting ready to turn 7yrs old the end of Sept.  She has become quite the "gamer" herself.  I have a chart of activities around the house that she can do.  The list includes things like taking out the trash, making her bed, putting her own laundry away and feeding her pet hamster among other things.  Not only does it teach her responcibility it also helps me out around the house.  I pay her for each task she does in a day.  Most things are 10cents, but others are a little more.  Good behavior is 20cents.  Also she is not under any circumstances allowed to play her games until her homework is done.  If it is nice outside I encourage her to play outside.  She also asks me before she plays her games.  Really there is not secret to getting your child to stop with the tv and games.  Just limit the time allowed.  If your childs behavior is not up to par, remove game privlages.  Trust me, after my daughter ended up grounded 2 different time for a week each time and was allowed absolutely no games or tv, she had a drastic change in her behavior for the better.

Vanessa - posted on 09/21/2009

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i had the same problem with my step daughter (12). if i gave her the option to go out and play instead she wouldnt take it so unfortunatly i had to be tough ( in her mind mean ). you have to turn the game or tv off yourself and force them to go out and play or do something else. go ahead and give them a set time they can play the game or watch tv everyday, just remember- the game or tv is a priveledge not a right

Jodi - posted on 09/21/2009

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You remove the games and TV? My kids know that if the TV or games don't go off when they are told, or when they shouldn't be using it, they lose it.

Angela - posted on 09/21/2009

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I have a similar problem in my family. When I get home, my dh is already watching tv or playing a game, and my 4 year old just wants to watch tv or a movie (though she will usually also play or color while it's on.) One of my friends suggested a no-tv night. This is hard even for me, b/c I'm also so used to hearing the tv. In lieu of tv she can play with her toys, go outside, color, or we can do an activity together. The best suggestion is to probably do an activity together...I think this is how most families introduce game night.



I have implemented this on the nights my daughter has her swim class. This makes it easier since there really isn't much time left for tv. But sometimes it does also get away from me.



If you are a structure type family, set up cetain times available for TV/games, or a length of time. If you have any kind of reward system (i.e. marbles, checks, stamps) then he can "pay" you from what he has earned for additional time.



You are still the boss. Don't let that get away from you.

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