How to fire a babysitter, politely.

Crystal - posted on 08/20/2009 ( 9 moms have responded )




I need to fire my sitter. I live in a small town so I don't want to upset this person. The husband endangered my daughter last week which I did not witness but my father did. He ended their 12 yr friendship over it. I didnt fire her then because i didnt have another sitter. Now people are coming out of the woodwork to tell me the husband and the wife are not right in the head. I now found a sitter.(yeah!) but i don't want to make these people angry simply because they convinced the state to let them adopt their daughter and i see two dif sides to them plus the school says shes nuts and they kind of scare me. Any suggestions would be great.


Angie - posted on 08/20/2010




Don't lie about why you're firing her, be an adult and be honest. I've lived in small towns too (from 100 to 5000 where I live now). I know it's easy to feel intimidated by the proposition of firing someone in your community who could cause you "issues" in the future. With that said, what you're doing is the proper thing. Make an appointment to visit with her over the weekend. Considering the end of the relationship between your father and her husband, this is not going to be a surprise to her. Just be honest with her and tell her that since your father witnessed inappropriate behavior, and specifically tell her what the incident was, you will no longer need her services. Also let her know that if anyone calls you to ask for a reference you will tell them about the incident. Good luck, I know this isn't easy.

[deleted account]

I have to agree not to lie about it. Your children come first. You don't owe her an explanation period! These are your children... not her's. Simply tell her, thank you, but you won't be needing her anymore. Keep it short & to the point. She knows why. You do not OWE her a reason!

Rita_2_davey - posted on 08/20/2010




I would just simply say that an old friend of yours happened to call. Someone you have known for some time, and your daughter loves' her dearly. She is great with your daughter. Tell her that your friend suggested that she would like to babysit her. She doesn't want to cause any problems with them (the ones' who care for her now). Just say you would love to try it out since your daughter has said how she would love to be with your friend. End of story. Let them know if things dont' work out, could you possibly bring her back. This way your really not subjecting tha they are just plain not the babysitters' you thought they were. I cant' see them thinking otherwise. If this woman is older than yourself, just say that your parents' know her well and you thought you would like to try it out. Just simply ask them if this would put them in a discomfortable position, let them know that you would love for your daughter to be with her as she is so excited to stay with her. Hopefully this works for you, I'm sure it will. I mean really what can they do, Nothing!! Take care and I hope and wish that all turns out. This way you wont' be stressing yourself out when she is there after school and prior to. You dont' need your daughter listening to them fighting either. Its not a good environment for her to be in. Hopefully I will hear from you soon.

Ruby - posted on 08/23/2009




I would just let her know that "too much is going on right now with your family that I do ot want my child to experience or that my family do not need to be involved with. I no longer need your service at this time, but I will keep in mind in the near future. Thank You."

Madonna - posted on 08/21/2009




Of course your kids safety come first!! Do not let anything compromise this if you can avoid it. Obviously the sitter knows you know about the incident as your father would have told you. If you let her keep sitting your kids then it is like saying to her "I'm OK with whatever happened". You would be giving her the power in your relationship. You need to tell her that you are concerned for your kids safety and even though you probably have no hard evidence, you want to make a change for the kids now.

Tell her that you're sorry to have to do this but that you have told your kids about the change already and to undo it would confuse them too much. Don't let her talk you out of changing. You cannot be held responsible for her income!

Good luck!


View replies by

[deleted account]

it is easy to fire a baby sitter. It all depends on the reasons you are firing her. if she is not doing her job very well or being mean to the kids, fire her immediately, you dont need to be polite when firing her. But if the reason about your finances, just call her and tell her you dont have enough money to keep her with her great job and tell her to look for another job and tell her if your financial situation changes, you will contact her for a comeback..

Let her know how much you appreciate her work, honesty and dedication towards her job as a care-giver but wll definately contact her as your situation changesl

Karen - posted on 08/21/2009




your child is your life!! you do what you need to do. dont think about offending any one...

Tina - posted on 08/21/2009




Sorry to be blunt. But do what you feel in your heart is the right thing. I can care less what any other people think , i would do what ever it takes to protect my children...

Nikki - posted on 08/20/2009




honesty is the best policy talk to her about the problem and tell her that you feel you need to try someone else for a while. then she knows how you feel and if there are hurt feeling they aren't your fault

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms