Is it normal for my daugher to worry about me dying?

Monica - posted on 06/21/2012 ( 6 moms have responded )




My 7 year old daughter seems to be concerned with what she should do if she were home with me and I died. She asked who would take care of her and where she would go. I am divorced so she is with me alone a lot. Should I be concerned by her questions? Is it normal for a child to be wondering these things?


Hannah - posted on 06/23/2012




yea it's normal im 12 and one night i was crying because a wild thought poped in my head ,the tought was what would happen if my mom died i didnt know how to stop my crying but once my crying quieted down i slept on the floor in my moms room.

Jennifer - posted on 06/21/2012




my son has been doing this since he was about 4 (he's nearly 6 now) his main concern is due to the fact that his father is in another country and to calm him, he needed to be told who he was going to - and who if that person was dead and so on down the list. it is most definitely a creepy thing to hear from your child...but the best thing you can really do is answer her. tell her what your plans are (and if you don't have them set down in a Will yet, do it) and also that there's no need to worry - you have no plans what so ever of leaving her. also, ask - after you have answered so she doesn't feel like you are fobbing her off - why she is worried. it could simply be that someone else has mentioned it and got her curious...or she could be worried about changes.

Louise - posted on 06/21/2012




It is obviously something that is playing on her mind. The best thing to do is confront it and lay her fears to rest. Explain to her that you are fit and well but in case of an emergency she should do this. Teach her emergency numbers and how to ring for help. Tell her who would look after her if you were taken ill. It is important to her.

This is normal in single children from single parent families.


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Elizabeth - posted on 06/21/2012




Our experience is similar, but our daughter was adopted from China. She does have abandonment issues which I believe can also show up in a divorce situation. My granddaughter lives with us right now along with her mom and she struggles with not having her dad around. Just keep talking to her and preparing her ahead of time for when you are away from her etc.

Chaya - posted on 06/21/2012




I know children older than her that have the same concerns. Answer her questions honestly and make it clear to her that she's not going to be left alone to fend for herself for many years, you may wish to tell her who the guardian would be if you were to pass.

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