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kindergarten teacher is no helpful

Shelly - posted on 01/27/2014 ( 7 moms have responded )

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today my kindergartener came from school all wet infact soaking and when i asked her she said today she peed in her jeans and when she told her teacher she said no problem when you go home tell your mom.
what i have to do?
my daughter is feeling very emberrased and didnt wana go to school

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♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 02/04/2014

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Oh boy...Lynda, I assume you've had poor experiences with your kids and teachers and schools, but please don't put that blanket statement of "the state of all schools in US & Canada is deplorable"...Because I SERIOUSLY DOUBT that you've taken the time to visit EACH AND EVERY SINGLE SCHOOL IN THE US, AND IN CANADA.

Folks, I know we all, deep down, want to believe that our kids would never, ever tell us a story that wasn't 150% true. BUT, (and here's the 'rub') there are TWO SIDES to each and every story told.

If you want to take your kid's word, then great. But, don't be surprised when you speak with the teacher/principal/adult in charge, and find out that you've not been getting the 'Rest of the story' from your kid.

Not because your kid is intentionally lying. I'm sure that Shelly's daughter DID pee her pants 'after lunch'. But to a 5 year old EVERYTHING between lunch time and when mom gets her is 'after lunch'. If the kid was, as the OP stated, SOAKING WET, then the incident had to have happened within the last 10-15 minutes prior to school letting out, when it is a complete zoo in that classroom. Since I wasn't in there, the first thing I'd do is talk to teacher.

I would recognize that lunch happened at (for example) 1 pm, and I'm picking my kid up 2 hours later, so therefore 'after lunch' must have been closer to 'time to pick up'.

But hey, go ahead and jump on that "schools and teachers are HORRIBLE BULLIES THAT HATE MY KIDS" Bandwagon, and see how far it gets you.

Speaking as both a parent, a teacher's aide, a paraprofessional with our school district, and now a university employee, I guarantee that teachers/principals/school officials will tend to take you more seriously if you investigate rather than accuse. And, if you don't automatically take your kid's word for everything, you'll find that you'll progress further and faster in your investigations of circumstances...

Lynda - posted on 02/01/2014

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You should go directly to the principal (and HOPEFULLY you have a good principal) to tell the principal that your child deserves to be taken care of with respect!!! Your child is supposed to go to school feeling safe and secure! Where's the empathy!!! And we are talking about a 5-year-old!!! Wow!!! And when my kids were in kindergarten, we sent an extra set of clothes, because a 5-year-old WILL have accidents. It's only normal! But beware of that teacher if that how he/she handled this situation. And the reason I say beware is because the state of all schools in U.S. and Canada is deplorable! There are a lot of teachers doing the bullying!!! And that was a form of bullying to leave your child in wet pants!!! Of course your child didn't want to go back to school! I'm sorry this happened to your little one!!!

Leigh - posted on 01/29/2014

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I am pretty sure teachers are required to at least let the parents know that the child has had an accident, but if it was towards the end of the day there probably wasn't much she could do. I have had to make a few trips to the school before for my nephew and they were very good about it. They removed him from the class as nonchalantly as they could so there would be no attention brought to him. If you think that your daughters teacher did not handle it correctly then you need to bring it to her attention. Have a conference with her and come up with a solution so it is not to happen again.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 01/28/2014

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Really...well, how close to "after lunch" did you pick her up?

Because, honestly, unless she sat there and pee'd herself all afternoon, she would most definitely NOT been soaking wet when you picked her up.

If she peed herself at lunch time, and you were not contacted, that is one thing, but she still wouldn't have been "soaking wet" when you picked her up, unless you picked her up within 10 minutes of the incident 'after lunch'.

Talk to the teacher, and get the 'rest' of the story. There ARE two sides...and you need to know both before deciding an appropriate course of action.

Shelly - posted on 01/28/2014

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I picked up my daughter from school and she was soaking and she said after lunch tine it happened.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 01/28/2014

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Well, like Chet said, kindergarten is usually required to have an extra set at school.

Figure out the timing, figure out what happened, and how, and handle it appropriately. If she was made to sit all day (which would mean that she'd have been dry by the time she got home, not "soaking")

As I look at this a bit further...how long between when she leaves school and gets home? Do you pick her up? If the child was truly "soaking", then it happened fairly close to bus load, and there would have not been time to change clothes, nor to notify you of the situation.

Chet - posted on 01/27/2014

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Does your daughter have a change of clothes at school? My experience has been that in kindergarten kids are usually asked to have an extra set of clothes at school, and the teacher just sends them out to change if they have an accident (they pee, fall in a puddle, spill paint all over themselves, etc). The dirty clothes come home tied up in a plastic bag.

Now, if your daughter didn't have a change of clothes and it was nearly the end of the day there may not have been anything else the teacher could do other than to reassure your daughter that this wasn't a big deal (it does happen to lots of kids) and instruct her to tell you as soon as she saw you.

If it happened earlier in the day and there was time for you to get to the school to bring clothes or to pick your daughter up the school really should have called you.

I would start by talking to teacher to find out exactly what happened. If you aren't happy with how things were handled and you don't get anywhere with the teacher go to the principal. A child should not be left wearing clothes they've peed in. But like I said, if the teacher found out ten minutes before the end of the day and your daughter didn't have any other clothes at school I'm not sure what else she could have done.

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