My 5 yo daughter had an accident at school

Liz - posted on 08/26/2010 ( 8 moms have responded )





My 5 yo daughter has just started kindergarten last week, and today I had to pick her up because she peed in her pants. She has had issues with accidents in the past. We've had her checked out by her pediatrician, had ultrasounds and xrays, and we even changed her daycare so that she could get more individual attention. When she was at her latest daycare/preschool, her teacher would give her consistent reminders to use the bathroom. But now, I know that her kindergarten teacher may not have the time to remind my daughter to use the bathroom.

I believe that my daughter's main issue is that she doesn't want to interrupt whatever she's doing to go to the bathroom. So she waits until the very last minute, until it's too late, and then she has an accident. In the past, we've used a potty watch to give her reminders, but that didn't work as well as someone reminding her to go. She doesn't seem to be in discomfort , so I don't suspect a UTI. I'm worried that her habits will get worse and she will have more accidents at school.

Of course, there is more to my story and my daughter's story (divorce, etc.) - which may have been an underlying cause as to why potty training wasn't so successful 2-3 years ago. But she was successful at her previous preschool, and I want to try to get my daughter to the next step where she doesn't ignore the signs that are telling her to go the bathroom.

Hopefully, her teacher may be willing to give my daughter reminders, however if not, does anyone have suggestions on how to help my little one go to the bathroom? Does anyone know of a good book or resource that I can use? And honestly, hearing that other parents have struggled with this might be helpful too - then I wouldn't feel like such a bad mom :-/




Jennifer - posted on 08/31/2010




Last year my son started kindergarten and he never had an accident until he started kindergarten. He'd get to playing or he'd get so in to learning that he'd forget so they teacher did what she always did and told all the kids to use the bathroom if they needed to before recess. I asked her to personally remind him to go to the bathroom so what she did was say "Adin, please use the bathroom before you go to recess." I had to have her do that for awhile because he'd go all day with out using the bathroom and then have to go really bad on the way home, there were some days where he didn't make it to the bathroom.

No matter how much you think that it is not the teachers job to mention it to the children to use the bathroom before recess, it is there job. Just talk to her teacher and ask her if she could please remind your daughter to use the bathroom periodically through out the day. Eventually your daughter will get it.


View replies by

Sherri - posted on 09/01/2010




Teachers may not be able to accommodate your requests. It is difficult to do when you have up 18 other kids to watch and teach as well. So I recommend keeping an extra pair of undies and pants in her backpack so she can change if an accident occurs.

[deleted account]

Make sure your child's teacher respects the fact that your child may not be able to wait for their "designated times" to use the bathroom. But encourage your daughter to go at every break they are given too. If she doesnt need to go at recess, tell her to try anyway.

My kindergarten teacher told me I had to wait. She felt that by age 5-6 we had enough control and had adequate breaks allowing us to go. Long story short, one time I had to go... she wouldnt let me... & I wet myself... I believe the conversation my mother had with that teacher caused her to NEVER tell a child they had to wait again.

Talk to her teacher, while some kids may not have accidents - many do. I'm certain the teacher will understand and do the best that she can to offer suggestions and help for your child.

Jennifer - posted on 08/31/2010




My sons teacher also would not let him go out to recess until he used the bathroom, sounds harsh but it worked.

[deleted account]

I"M STRUGGLING TOO!!! My daughter had an accident yesterday! Her teacher has been told that she has a bladder disorder, that she takes medication daily, and has had a recent surgery to help. When she raised her hand to ask to go to the bathroom yesterday the teacher misunderstood her and thought she was asking to go get her jacket so her teacher told her she had to stay in her seat. She also had an accident last Friday. This has not been a good start to the school year! My daughter's urologist has suggested a watch with a timer on it to train her bladder to void at certain times. He has also offered to send a note to school to remind the teacher of my daughter's bladder disorder. It sounds like you've tried the watch though. We always keep an extra pair of shorts and panties in the backpack because accidents will happen and I do not want her to be ashamed for coming home. I have learned that if you give your child a dose of Mirilax daily, it keeps their stool so soft that their bladder functions better. Ask your pediatrician what they think about that. Most urologists insist on giving it.

My daughter has never had a symptom of a UTI other than excess urination because her bladder walls are thicker than they should be. Maybe your daughter simply does not have the same sensation that other children have. That's the problem here. Do you happen to live near Cincinatti? We had such a wonderful experience with their children's urology department. We went from having no luck whatsoever to almost success. She used to have 3-4 accidents daily. Now just once weekly. Good luck!

Zita - posted on 08/30/2010




Don't worry about it, its happened my kids too. What I did was put a change of clothes in a bag and put it in their schoolbag and told their teacher it was there if necessary. In kindergarten they can get so caught up in what they are doing they just forget to go until its too late. Its also new to them to go during recess, they need to learn to go even when they don't feel they have to. Have a word with her teacher and ask her to remind your daughter to use the bathroom. Hope this helps. This happened with 2 of my kids and they are fine, just one of those things!!

Jane - posted on 08/27/2010




You're not a bad mom. Just the stress of starting a new school can cause regression.

The teacher will probably be willing to give reminders, and in addition, if it were me, I would get a copy of the daily schedule the teacher follows. Go over it with your daughter until she can repeat "I use the bathroom after x, y, and z", or roughly every two to three hours.

In the meantime, it might not hurt to have an extra set of clothes at school. The nurse will usually keep them in her office.

Angie - posted on 08/26/2010




My daughter has no issues - hapy family life, no divorce, no drama of any kind and she wet her pants in kindergarten too. BUT she didn't tell the teacher because she didn't want to be disruptive. I noticed when we got into a hot car that there was a problem -p u!!

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms