My 8 year old is constantly crying over the smallest things

Michelle - posted on 01/20/2012 ( 15 moms have responded )

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My daughter is 8 and the littlest thing sets her off into tears! I am truly at my wits end and starting to feel like a terrible mother as she is always crying and truly 90% of the time for NOTHING! Causing such stress at home with the family, my husband gets sooo uptight about!!!

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Tammy - posted on 03/05/2012

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I have the same emotional issue with my 8 year old, the only BIG difference is, i have a son, not a daughter and he's very emotional, cries easily and for trivial things at times. His teacher has spoken to me about it as well and to be honest it is kind of embarrassing, what can i do to motivate him to stop being a "cry baby" as one of his classmates describes him.

Suriyavarshini - posted on 05/14/2013

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Hi,

I have the same emotional issue with my 8 year old son, the only BIG difference is cries at home alone. I am a single mother. I am with my parents, my entire family gets upset if he starts crying. How to over come this issue

Bindi - posted on 02/03/2012

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My 8 year old is crying at just about anything these days too. I think it may be another phase that will pass. Part of it could be extra homework, friend issues, school challenges etc. When I stopped getting uptight about her being upset or trying so hard to cheer her up and just saying "It is ok to be upset, I understand honey." and giving her a little comforting squeeze helped. Then I get up and continue what Im doing and give her the space to calm down. Once she realizes that I am not going to sit there and plead with her to "cheer up" or "stop crying" she lets it go and cheers right up!



Do not worry, it should pass and remember we all feel like a bad mother at times. Hope the method I shared helps :)

Tq - posted on 10/28/2014

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I have an 18 year old and an 8 year old. The crying is just a maladaptive way of coping, and its extremely manipulative. If this behavior sticks, it becomes an automatic knee jerk reaction to anything that the kid doesn't like. Hopefully, it will go away on its own, but if it doesn't, you have to strategize as to how what you are going to do about it.

My 18 year old used to act like this, through out all his elementary school years, and I was aware of it, but in his later years too. He didn't act like this at home, but in his public school, his crying manipulated his teachers, and peers into feeling sorry for him. It became a knee jerk reaction and a way of coping, having people think that you are so incompetent, that they don't expect anything from you. I wish I would've caught this sooner.

Now, my 8 year old daughter is acting like this too. And she is just getting worse and worse and more and more avoidant of doing things. Now, it seems that anything that doesn't go her way, or what she expects, she just cries about it. It is driving us insane.

Since it hasn't gone away, I talked to her about it. She is having nightmares about monsters, and it seems as though everything makes her scared. That's what happens when you cry about everything.

The crying becomes the focus. Its very normal, but its still very debilitating and not a good way for children to learn how to handle things. I wish I was more heavy handed with my son about when he was younger, but he was my first, and I guess I believed that he was actually suffering. He wasn't. In the beginning, it was all manipulation, but now, he is jus tan incompetent 18 year old.

Marla - posted on 01/20/2012

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My 8 year old daughter is very sensitive too. She gets her feelings hurt at the slightest thing! I think maybe it could be that they are experiencing hormonal changes to head into puberty soon. Don't feel like a terrible mom! I would just console her when it is necessary, but then give her time to herself if she needs to cool down. Talk to your hubby about not being so uptight about it.

I have talked to my mom and older moms about it. They all tell me this is normal and that I should expect more to come through pre-teen and teen years. Hang in there hun!

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Dcake - posted on 06/25/2017

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The reason why all your kids on this site cry at night at any age is , you are stiffling them ( babying them ) in their everyday life. If you want a them to act grown up and brave , you have to start treating them that way . Be strong for them and they will mimic you . When they cry at night . Don't say ( awww mommy is here for you , or daddy is here for you ). You go in and say ( you will be just fine !! Walk away ! Let them cry . They will stop . If not , tell them to stop crying !! They need firm consistancey . Not aww poor baby ! STOP passifiying your kids ! Your making them insecure ! If your strong for them they will be strong .

Kesaiserris - posted on 05/15/2015

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My 7 year old daughter cries easily and is very sensitive. Generally speaking I find that if small seemingly innocuous things are setting her off it because something is actually bothering her. For example she is dealing with a very stressful school situation right now. She has some trouble expressing her feelings in words and the issues she is going through with school are painful and difficult to process. I think it is important to sit down with children regularly and talk to them. Find out what is going on in their lives and try not to be so quick to dismiss their feelings. I make her use a normal tone when speaking, whining is not okay. When she is talking at the top of her register she knows I can't even hear her much less understand her. Acknowledge your child's feelings, don't make fun but don't baby. When children are overwhelmed or too tired they also get this way, sometimes they need a break even if they don't realize it themselves. Teach your child tricks for calming down, when upset.

Kelly - posted on 04/20/2015

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This is such a relief, My 8yrnold daughter is crying all the time over the silliest of things. she's so emotional, I've been feeling like a bad mother as I work all week and my daughter has been staying with her grandmas during the week and I see her evenings and she's home weekends as I work long hour but have no choice with rent etc. My daughter has been perfectly fine with this arrangement as she has an amazing relationship with her grandma and she only lives 20min drive away. My daughter turns eight and oh my gosh the emotions, she now cries every evening about all things most worrying about losing me and her father In accidents and wants to come home. I'm very close to quitting my job but how we would survive scares me, my field of work unfortunetly doesn't have any work in my town and I have to travel. I feel so bad it's destroying me, reading these post knowing that I'm not alone with an emotional young girl and could possibly be hormones, apart of the growing up process gives me a little bit of relief. I believe my daughter has possibly anxiety as she fears she will lose us in an accident? Any advice to what I can do to assure her? I'm with her every evening and weekends we have tons of fun, she's knows how loved she is. Grandma has her doing home work every evening and I no she hates that and when she comes home she has fun. I feel sometimes she gives me guilt trips and suddenly her mood changes and she's all happy again. So confusing! My little princess has grown into a little lady, she's always been such a happy child only cried if she fell and hurt herself but quickly got up and carried on playing but now she's so emotional, just cries and when I ask her what's wrong she's says nothing I just feel like crying. Are these emotions normal? The only way I can see forward at the moment is to quit my job and see if my girl is happier! Any advice would be greatly appreciated. :)

Tiffany - posted on 02/07/2012

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My 6 year old daughter is the same way and I am constantly wanting to baby her and let her sleep in my bed when she wakes up in the middle of the night acting like this but it is causing her Dad a lot of stress and making him uptight. I am not sure what to do anymore. I ased her if she wanted to talk to her brothers CMH worker and she said yeah, however i don't think that will help right now. If anyone has any suggestions on this sitch I would be greatly appreciated to listen.

Michelle - posted on 02/03/2012

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Thank you everyone! So good to know that I am not the only one - sounds corny!

Jill - posted on 01/31/2012

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my 7 year started to become like that. i asked her, "how old are you? you're in 2nd grade so pick yourself up and let it go...."



i've also said things like, "ah, man! I saw you bump your head, that must have hurt. give it a good rub and you'll be fine." then i'd walk away and not pay attention to her.



worked like a charm. i did notice too that she acted like that when she was tired. so i tried to get her to bed a little earlier each night and the crying fits went away. the world just never seems right when you're so tired. hang in there. this too, shall pass!

Alyanna - posted on 01/29/2012

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There's hope! My DD was like that at 8 too, now at 10 she's calming down. She still cries over nothing occasionally, but she's more aware of it (she'll tell me "I'm not sad, I just feel like I need to cry") & it's much less frequent now.

Zetena - posted on 01/24/2012

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ok we are on the same page* scary***** i just posted today about the trivial things that set her off. I too tend to feel like a bad mom because she is never over 75% happy. My husband gets p.o.ed when she is rude and disrespectful to me, and or when she goes into her poor me stage. She is my most beautiful disaster!!! I may not make it to her teenage years. lol Never can I do anything just right for her. Her dad on the other hand may turn out to be her saving grace!

Kyleigh - posted on 01/21/2012

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My DSD7 almost 8 is like that! Cries about everything, not getting her way, just telling her no nicely, I think its a phase perhaps they will soon outgrow. Do you talk to her after she is done with the crying spat?

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