Any other single moms out there finding it hard to find a decent man who is geniune about dating a single mother?

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Carin - posted on 02/25/2009

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I'm alone for almost 5 years now. Must be honest I am not really looking for somebody because my son keep me so busy. Between school, Tug-of-war practices and all the other things I must do I don't really got the time. The few dates I were on were awfull and the only thing the men were looking for were s**. Not really interested want the frienship first. Maybe that is my problem.

Ginny - posted on 02/23/2009

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Like others', I have tried the on-line dating, but as soon as the realization set in that I had children, none of them worked.  I am fortunate to have met a man that has no children and has taken mine in and been a wonderful influence on them and a big help to me.  He came along when I wasn't looking.  I had pretty much "given up" and figured it was just going to be me and the children.  I feel like when I could accept it was just going to be me and the children and do the best that I could and be happy with my situation, the right person came along.  It is hard to explain, but I wish you good luck and happiness.

Nathalie - posted on 02/23/2009

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I have agree with most the lovely ladies here. Be patient is what I get told all the time. Although it is rather hard to do just that. Being a single mother of 2 kids (ages 3 yrs and 3 mths) and being only 21 myself is hard. I have been trying online dating but most guys between the ages of 22 and 27 just want to have a bit of fun with no committment and I have had my fair share of rude comments about it being to hard to date a single mom.



 



I get sick of people telling me all the time to just be patient when I see my ex flaunting his girlfriend (who loves our kids) in front of me all the time. I just keep thinking positive, I have made so many great friendships and a few guys I would love to have a relationship with but they only want fun.

Kelly - posted on 02/22/2009

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I've been wondering the same thing. I have two children ages 1 and 2 (18 months apart) and both have special needs. I knew when I adopted them that finding the right guy would now be even harder. But I wouldn't change it for the world! What I know now is that when the right guy does come around he really is going to be the most wonderful guy. Hang in there....it will happen.

DSL - posted on 05/22/2014

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I know that this post is old but I have been having the same problem. I find myself defending the character of my kids upfront with a statement like " I have great well behaved kids and they are great students. I shouldn't have to do that. Then I get the men who have kids themselves and I think that it is going to work out and I later realize they just want sex. It starts off good but when they realize I am not going to do that they seem to leave. I have a great career so I also get the men who think I am going to play mommy to them and treat them to everything. I am old fashion and I still believe in a man being a provider. It is so hard for me. I am losing hope about finding love, and even marriage. I cant take another heartbreak. I have been at this for 3 years now and no success. I came close only to find out he was a possessive stalker.

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Foxtrotter - posted on 05/23/2014

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I think we have to be proactive when it comes to finding a decent man. Yes, it's a lot more complicated as a single parent! On my case it requires some coordinating and some understanding on his side. Still haven't fallen madly in love but I've talked to a couple of guys... but watch out!!! I've found out that many of them are just horny!!!!!

Sonja - posted on 01/13/2013

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I have been single since 2008. I have been trying here and there but no success

Becky - posted on 02/23/2009

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I too have to agree with the other posts. My son's father and I split up when he was 6 months old (he's now 8-1/2). I've been in a couple of long-term relationships since then, but never found someone to truly accept my son into their lives. I live 2 states away from anyone else in my family, work full-time and go to school full-time...all the while raising my son on my own. I vowed after my last relationship ended that I wouldn't "settle" just to be with someone...and I haven't. I'm so used to the "single" life that I can live without a man. After casually dating a wonderful man that I had met online for the 6 weeks that my son was visiting my family out of state, we got to know each other as individuals. He knew that I was a single mom and was skeptical at first but now we couldn't be happier. We've been together for 7 months. He's there for my son more than even his own father has ever been! I know hang in there is hard to hear, but it will happen...you just have to have an open heart and an open mind. Be yourself and be honest up front and you'll find someone who can truly accept you and your kids :)

Alison - posted on 02/23/2009

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I agree with others - NEVER settle for second-best.  I've been on my own for 7 years and I would rather remain single than accept someone who isn't right for my children or myself!!  I just keep hoping and praying that one day my path will cross with someone special :)  Thanks for sharing ladies.

Lisa - posted on 02/23/2009

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I had the hardest time with this for years. But they are out there. Last year I found one that is amazing and understanding of my faults and of my connection with Noah. It gets better.

Adriel - posted on 02/23/2009

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I was thinking the same thing for so long, especially seeing as I didn't have much time to date, being a single mom and making a living to support us. It seems I kept finding one loser after another. Never just settle, keep passing the jerks by and I promise one day you will find someone happy to be in not only your life but your child/ren's life as well. It finally happened for me.

Pamela - posted on 02/23/2009

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I lost my husband to cancer it will be 2 yrs in June, I havent really gotten out there and dated yet. I have three kids still living at home 20/18/ and 11.....I worry about finding someone has wonderful as my husband was. It will be hard for anyone to come close to filling his shoes, so right now I am just hoping to find someone that is genuine and that is a strong enough person to handle me...lol It really sucks being forced out here into the world of dating again...but I dont wish to be alone forever...so am Praying there will be someone out there for me!

Aimee - posted on 02/23/2009

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It is hard to find a man worth your time and  eventually your childs, however be patient believe i Know that as a mom you want nothing more than companionship and some "grown up" talk.  I know many people arent a fan of the online thing but I tried it and have had success and I have been raising my daughter on my own since day one she's 9 now.  Dont give up, and if babysitting is an issue I have met other single moms and we "swp time"  so we can date and our kids get to have a playdate.  GOOD LUCK

Sarah - posted on 02/23/2009

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i find it impossible to date anyone genuine and adding to the fact that im a single mom i'm also only 20 years old so needless to say guys my age dont want to be sitting at home on a friday night watching a movie.everyone tells me just be patient it will happen someone out there is right for you which i guess is true but it definatly gets frustrating and very lonely sometimes

Alison - posted on 02/23/2009

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I've been a single Mum since my marriage ended in February 2002 - my children are 11 and 13 and I've been online dating for the past 2 years. I've made heaps of great friends but my online relationships have unfortunately been "players". It's not easy finding someone who's genuine, whether it's in person or online. And I suspect already having children means some guys aren't interested in raising someone else's children ... but I haven't given up hope of finding someone special. Hang in there :) Ali

Jodi - posted on 02/22/2009

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I think it's just hard to find a geniune guy to date at all these days let alone adding the single mother factor into it. They all seem to play games and cant be honest. im thinking all the good ones are taken, but im trying to be positive and hope there are a few decent ones still out there, i guess it's just sorting through them, lol

User - posted on 02/22/2009

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I was there, in your shoes! They are out there just be paitent and keep looking when the timings right he'll be there! I finally found mine! I was divorced at 26 and found him at 29. I always said I'd never on-line date, but I did. Found him! No joke! Good luck:)

Angela - posted on 02/22/2009

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It is hard as a single mom to find a man who has the right heart and attitude and is willing to have an instant family. My son is 16 so for me it needs to be a man not wanting younger children but willing to be a dad and role model to a teenager. I do believe that the right man is out there and all we need to do is look to God and step out and date until we find that right man. Good luck with your search.

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