Babys dads new wife

Janae - posted on 02/18/2009 ( 2 moms have responded )

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I recently had my daughter in october. I was is a very sticky stituation. I am 23 and cheated on my bf with my 38 year old supervisor. We had this affair going on for a year. In that time he had a gf and a baby with her. he also got engaged. i know i was wrong for what i done. I have never justified my actions. well when i turned up pregnant i told him. i knew it was his or my bf. i quit my job and he never contacted me during my preganacy. in that time he got married to his fiance who had no clue i was pregnant or that it could even be his. when i had her me and my bf did a dna test because i was up front and honest about the whole thing from the beginning. My beautiful daughter turned out to be my supervisors. he then told his wife who kicked him out for a few short weeks then took him back. now he gets my daughter on a pretty regular basis. This worries me, i know he loves his children more than anything but i have a serious problem when he works third shift that my daughter is left there with his wife to take care of. It would take a very strong person to treat her as her own or look at her with no resentment. i have talked to her and she says it not my daughters fault but i have a very had time believeing she can over come her anger and resentment towards me and not treat he like a mistake. i am haveing a very hard time feeling secure about this. Not to mention in the time i was pregnant and him knowing he married her and had her take out her iud and got her pregnant. i know prenancy hormones are crazy and i dont want them taken out on my baby. any advice ? i know i was wrong in what ive done but it dosent change the fact that i am a mother who cares about her childs well being.

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Alba - posted on 02/22/2009

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i deal wit da same thing with da my baby dads future wife. here is my story...i met my him and we were dating fo a couple months till i found out he was cheating on her with me, in which i quick ended da whole thing. i just couldnt do dat, he den broke up wit her and we started dating again. we got together she called him n told him she was pregnant wit her second child (his first)..ironically i found out i was pregnant a month right after dat. we stayed together through my whole pregnancy and 8 months after i had her. he den got abusive and i left. he got back wit his EX n is now gonna marry her n just had another kids together. my daughter goes ova dea from time to time when he Decides he wants to see her....i cant stand dis woman, i kno shes good wit kids but i feel da same about how different she is gonna treat my child. Wat i did is only allow my daughter to be in da house n under his custody if he himself is gonna be dea to care fo her n not her. If not, den he simply doesnt get her. i think dat not till u feel comfortable to have ur child being takin care of by her den u should do it. I told her father dat not until my daughter can home home herself n explain to me wats going on around her den she may not be left alone wit dat woman. cuz wen she can, my daughter can tell me herself if she is being taken care differently or anything in which den i can take sum action myself.

I hope dis helps a lil, well its my opinion at least. good luck, let me kno if i can help wit anything else

Alice - posted on 02/19/2009

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It sounds like you've been taken in by a womanizer! too bad 4 you! He must be some guy! LOL In no way am I making fun of you, I just think some men are never accountable for anything! You did the right thing talking to his wife. This is your child, whom you love and care for. It is possible that she does have good intentions, but has been hurt as well! Keep this communication going as best you can. If he has legal visits you cant do much but comply. Watch for signs in your child that all is well, and try to relax. Ther's a chance that this will be ok. Take the time that you have alone to take care of yourself, being a single parent is hard. It sounds like you are a competent lady who will know if your baby is being mistreated, trust your instincts! good luck!

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